×

A mere 314 million of the world’s more than 7 billion inhabitants live in the United States. Under God’s sovereign care the world enjoys myriad cultures and subcultures, varying governments and authorities. God is creative. God himself is diverse in his nature as three in one (Gen 1:26). And as man made in his image began to fill the Earth, and sinned against him by striving to make a name for ourselves (Gen 11), we too became diverse and distinct from one another.

Yet God has given us one Word, translated in many languages and versions. Scripture contains the very words of God (Ps 19:7; 1 Thess 2:13). For “all Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work” (2 Tim 3:16-17). God doesn’t say that Scripture is only useful to certain people or certain cultures. The Word of God has authority over all people. The Word is useful for every tribe and tongue.

In light of God’s beautiful diversity, I asked a few women how God’s Word and their culture affect the application of Scripture as it relates to femininity. Here is a taste of how they responded according to their singular experiences in varied cultures.


Joanna Mathew, Indian, lives in Dubai

What is your culture like in regards to male/female relationships and interactions?

Joanna Mathew: India is a diverse country with many different cultures. So my answers may not be true of all Indians but are based on my own experience. Typically, Indians are very conservative when it comes to interactions between single men and women. For example, I went to a girl’s school, and we weren’t allowed to interact with the boys from the boy’s school. It is typically forbidden to date, and marrying for love (as opposed to an arranged marriage) is sometimes frowned upon. This is because sexual purity is held in very high regard and not because the Indian culture places a low value on love.

Within marriage, the man is the dominant partner. Obedience to the husband and respect for his family are prized virtues in the Indian culture. In some families, women are esteemed and treated really well, whereas in others they are considered second-class citizens and are treated poorly. The latter attitude has changed a lot in recent years as women are being empowered.

When you became a Christian, was the concept of being equal in personhood but assigned different roles new to you? What about submission? Was that a new concept?

JM: I am fortunate in that my culture has set me up well to accept the teachings of Scripture. I never found it unusual that women were to submit to their husbands or be their helpers. I was surprised, though, to find that God designed these roles; they aren’t just something we came up with. I was also amazed to learn that God modeled them after the relationship between Christ and the church. It helped me understand the importance of honoring these roles.

Even though submission was not a new concept for me, I realized that the reason a Christian wife submits to her husband is very different to the reason a non-Christian wife does. In my culture, women tend to submit because of fear, social pressure, weakness, or just because it is what they have always known. A Christian woman submits to her husband because God asks it of her and because her marriage is modeled after the intimate relationship between Christ and the church. She submits to her husband because God first loved her in Christ, and she does it by the power of the Holy Spirit.

My mom taught me how a submissive wife doesn’t mean a passive wife, but one who actively seeks good for her family and respectfully spurs her husband on to growing in Christ-likeness. My father loved my mother deeply in ways that, even as children, we could see and appreciate. My mother has struggled with her health for many years, and through all that time, he made innumerable sacrifices to care for us. He never complained but was always strong, kind, and encouraging. His example of self-sacrificial leadership really brought the Scriptures to life for me.

Is there anything about biblical femininity that you find difficult? Any due to your background or culture?

JM: I find Peter’s exhortation about inner beauty in 1 Peter 3:3-4 both wonderful and very challenging. When I first read this passage I was struck by how many years I had spent desiring more physical beauty without a thought to inner beauty. My struggle is further compounded by the fact that I live in the consumer center of Asia, where only your outer self matters. A quiet and gentle spirit is often misunderstood to mean weak and timid. While this is a challenge, I am surrounded in church by women who are truly beautiful on the inside and whose lives are a wonderful picture of the gospel, and that really motivates me to work hard at my inner beauty.

I have also struggled with what Scripture says about only men teaching in church. This has more to do with my personality than my background. I love teaching, and I feel that God has given me some gifts to be able to do so. Again, I have been encouraged by other women in my church who have put their ability to teach to good use by leading women’s groups and retreats and teaching children. This has really helped me find a place where I can be useful and also respond well to male leadership in my church. And over time I have come to really appreciate and understand God’s wisdom in setting men up as the leaders of the body.


Yvette Knight, Jamaican, African descent, lives in New York City

Tell me about your upbringing.

Yvette Knight: I was raised in a very strict, religious, God-fearing home. I went to church and to Sunday school. At the time, Jamaica was considered a religious country. Dancing, drinking, and wearing makeup were not considered the “Christian” thing, and so there was none of that as part of my upbringing.

My mother raised me. She was a single mom and worked to raise two women. Having her as an example made it easier for me to see women outside of the very traditional cultural role of my upbringing.

What is your culture like in regards to male/female relationships and interactions?

YK: As it relates to gender roles, the Jamaican culture was very traditional. Men are considered to be the leaders and the head. Men were the breadwinners, and women had the responsibility of taking care of the home and the children.

What are your thoughts on the roles of men and women from Scripture?

YK: Because I am a complementarian, there is nothing about biblical femininity that I find difficult. My understanding of my position (as a woman) in Christ was very liberating.


Maria Rosales, Latina, lives in Tennessee

What is your culture like in regards to male/female relationships and interactions? 

Maria Rosales: Latino culture is very traditional when it comes to gender roles. Men are to work to provide for the home, and women are the caregivers and homemakers. Women serve their husbands and their children. Men are tough, dominant, and supposed to be “machos.” Three of my sisters and my mom have been stay-at-home moms who care for their children and care for their home. I remember one time, my brother in law told me I should be in the kitchen instead of going to school. There is no basis or reason for this other than culture and what is expected of male and females.

Have you ever experienced patriarchy? 

MR: No, but I have been part of a matriarchy. As an environmentalist working for a nonprofit on clean energy issues, our organization was run by women (not on purpose, but everyone was proud of it). The youth climate movement sees itself as the next great social movement (following women’s rights and civil rights movements). We had readings and discussions about anti-oppression, equality, and how to dismantle institutionalized oppression, which includes sexism. It was a great opportunity to see how progressive views differ from biblical views of issues like these.

When you became a Christian were women’s roles a new concept? 

MR: It was new, but exciting. I’ve seen women under complete submission, and I’ve seen women take on leadership roles and do it all. Christian women’s roles were refreshing, exciting, and different than anything I’d seen before. After seeing women in our church live out their calling, this new view of women’s roles became irresistible to me.

I found it freeing after understanding this is the way God designed it to be. Environmental culture told me women need to strive for equality. God’s Word says we are already equal because we’re made in his image. Latino culture told me women should submit and serve for no reason. God’s Word says women are to submit and serve the leadership of their husbands just as the church submits to Christ. The Word of God is the perfect balance between two extremes with the right justification.


Jane Doe*, Chinese, lives in the Southern United States

(Jane Doe is anonymous to protect her parents, who are missionaries in a closed country.)

Tell us about your background.

Jane Doe: My father was a pastor and held a day job working for a Christian publishing company. He traveled all around the world for his job and for mission work—-more frequently the older I got. My mother was a stay-at-home mom. Much of her time was dedicated to her family and the church.

Did you have a model for womanhood growing up?

JD: My model was my mother. She always stood by and supported my dad, and never seemed to miss a morning reading her Bible. She is loving, generous towards others, humble, stretched every dollar, and prayed fervently—-God has always been the main vision and guide in her life.

What is your culture like in regards to male/female relationships and interactions?

JD: The traditional view of Chinese culture is that men are the head of the household; they more valued than women. Familial wealth, status, and power would be passed down through men. I know there have been many changes since the Cultural Revolution, so this isn’t as widespread as it used to be. Women have gained more rights and value and are seen as more equals to men.

Have you found the application of the Word as it relates to womanhood to be easy or difficult? 

JD: As a college student and a newlywed, I saw submission as a bending of my will, ideas, independence, and person to someone else completely; that my every choice and act in life would be determined by my spouse. I saw biblical femininity as being a woman restricted in clothing choice, volume of voice, freedom to speak one’s thoughts, and finding joy only in a clean and pleasant home, home-cooked meals, and child-rearing.

At some point after being newly married, I gave my struggles over to God. Since submission and leadership were in the Bible, I knew they were good things, but wasn’t sure how they should look in my marriage and life. I asked God to change my heart. I could never change my heart on my own, and I wasn’t sure what to believe. I knew that God could transform my heart, help me to see clearly, and guide me.

Now, after seven years of marriage, femininity and submission do not feel restrictive or a list of do’s and don’ts. In our marriage there is an easy rhythm in the ways I submit and my husband leads. I assume that submission and leadership look different in every family. In our family, I trust and respect my husband’s judgment in our family’s big life-changing decisions. I feel able to disagree or share my thoughts and know that he will listen and guide our family according to my opinions and desires as well. He does not order my every act and daily task as I might have thought these roles would’ve looked like. I put him first before myself, and he also puts me first before himself. Within striving to be a godly example of biblical submission and femininity, there is not a list of wrongs and rights that I must keep in order to be deemed as godly. No more confusion and legalism, instead I seek to love God and my husband.


Women’s roles can look different for someone in India or New York City than for someone in Nashville or Dallas. God’s Word, rather than bending to context, challenges every culture. Nevertheless, these varying cultures, when submitted to the Word, can and do look different while remaining faithful to the Bible.

Podcasts

LOAD MORE
Loading