We never really know how much we love something until we consider what we are willing to give up to get it. This is a fairly basic point, and we see it proven in various ways in our lives. Whether we are talking about our health, careers, or any other goals, we sacrifice one thing to get something else.
Last week I wrote about conflict and how the avoidance of it can lead to us missing out on some surprising blessings. Today I want to highlight another aspect of this thread. If we avoid peace for the sake of personal comfort then we prize comfort over peace. This is selfish, anti-gospel, and harmful to the church. Therefore it is something that we should make sure that we are not doing.
It is inevitable that Christians will have some degree of strife that requires the uncomfortable pursuit of peace. Think about the dynamics at play, and I think you will agree. One of the main qualifications for membership in the church is to admit that you are a sinner. You can’t be a Christian if you don’t believe that you have sinned against God and need forgiveness. The church is made up of people who have sinned against God and one another. What do you suppose is going to happen as we spend time together? Lots of people (even sinful people) together in a relatively small space will inevitably bring about some conflict. Now what do we do about it? We have a choice to make. And often, though not always, it comes down to peace vs. personal comfort. I’m arguing for the former in this post. Here’s why.
Prizing comfort over peace is selfish.
If we have a conflict, there needs to be work done to make peace. The thing that so often gets in the way is not the other person (though that does happen) but ourselves. We don’t want to have those difficult adult conversations that require vulnerability, intimacy, and transparency. It is uncomfortable to have to say what needs to be said. But hold on just a second, since when are we as Christians ever called to pursue personal comfort? In fact, many times being a faithful Christian is not about being comfortable but faithful. And this faithfulness often makes us uncomfortable. Remember, Christianity is not primarily about comforting ourselves but denying ourselves (Lk. 9.23).
Christians are to be about peacemaking, especially in the church. Consider just a few verses from the New Testament:
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.” (Matthew 5:9)
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness.” (Galatians 5:22)
“If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” (Romans 12:18)
“And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.” (Colossians 3:15)
“Finally, brothers, rejoice. Aim for restoration, comfort one another, agree with one another, live in peace; and the God of love and peace will be with you.” (2 Corinthians 13:11)
Prizing comfort over peace is anti-gospel.
This header sounds harsh, doesn’t it? I admit it, it sounds extreme. But friend the gospel is extreme! When we think about denying ourselves (and our comfort) for peace we are simply doing what Christ has done for us. He is the one who took the initiative, left the beauty of heaven, came to earth, became a man, served us in life, and suffered a brutal wrath-bearing death. All of this was to make peace. Christ was made to be uncomfortable in his pursuit of peace. When we think about how uncomfortable it might be to have hard conversations with other believers we are beginning to grasp some of the glory of the gospel. Let’s be clear: if there is a problem with another Christian and we are unwilling to work it out, then we should probably stop calling ourselves “gospel-centered.” If we are looking for a way to mix the gospel in as a description of our life then it would have to be “gospel-muting.” We can’t say we are all about the Jesus’s gospel but then not apply it with Jesus’s people.
Prizing comfort over peace is harmful to the church.
This point would just seem to follow from the previous two. When we think about the church we need to remember that we are a body. If a member is out of joint with another member, then we are not playing a full strength. Like having a dislocated finger or shoulder, the body is not going to be right. When there is outstanding conflict, then believers are not going to enjoy and partake of the full blessings in Christ. Instead of musing on forgiveness of sins there is nursing of bitterness. Instead of the prayerful contemplation of the triumph of the gospel there is the personal fantasizing of winning arguments. Instead of aiming to serve one another there is a distancing from and avoidance of one another. Instead of harmony there is awkwardness. This is harmful to the church, and it makes us look like the world.
I know that comfort feels good, and pursuing peace often feels hard. But in those moments of being governed by our feelings, remember what God’s Word says. That gap between what we want and what God wants gets closed through sanctification. May God close that gap in our lives as we learn to love peace even at the cost of personal comfort.
