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Reprinted by Hunter Baker:

To the churches concerning homosexuals and lesbians:

Many of you believe that we do not exist within your walls, your schools, your neighborhoods. You believe that we are few and easily recognized. I tell you we are many. We are your teachers, doctors, accountants, high school athletes. We are all colors, shapes, sizes. We are single, married, mothers, fathers. We are your sons, your daughters, your nieces, your nephews, your grandchildren. We are in your Sunday School classes, pews, choirs, and pulpits. You choose not to see us out of ignorance or because it might upset your congregation. We ARE your congregation. We enter your doors weekly seeking guidance and some glimmer of hope that we can change. Like you, we have invited Jesus into our hearts. Like you, we want to be all that Christ wants us to be. Like you, we pray daily for guidance. Like you, we often fail.

When the word “homosexual” is mentioned in the church, we hold our breaths and sit in fear. Most often this word is followed with condemnation, laughter, hatred, or jokes. Rarely do we hear any words of hope. At least we recognize our sin. Does the church as a whole see theirs? Do you see the sin of pride, that you are better than or more acceptable to Jesus than we are? Have you been Christ-like in your relationships with us? Would you meet us at the well, or restaurant, for a cup of water, or coffee? Would you touch us even if we showed signs of leprosy, or aids? Would you call us down from our trees, as Christ did Zacchaeus, and invite yourself to be our guest? Would you allow us to sit at your table and break bread? Can you love us unconditionally and support us as Christ works in our lives, as He works in yours, to help us all to overcome?

To those of you who would change the church to accept the gay community and its lifestyle: you give us no hope at all. To those of us who know God’s word and will not dilute it to fit our desires, we ask you to read John’s letter to the church in Pergamum. “I have a few things against you: You have people there who hold to the teaching of Balaam, who taught Balak to entice the Israelites to sin by eating food sacrificed to idols and by committing sexual immorality. Likewise, you also have those who hold to the teaching of the Nicolaitans. Repent therefore!” You are willing to compromise the word of God to be politically correct. We are not deceived. If we accept your willingness to compromise, then we must also compromise. We must therefore accept your lying, your adultery, your lust, your idolatry, your addictions, YOUR sins. “He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.”

We do not ask for your acceptance of our sins any more than we accept yours. We simply ask for the same support, love, guidance, and most of all hope that is given to the rest of your congregation. We are your brothers and sisters in Christ. We are not what we shall be, but thank God, we are not what we were. Let us work together to see that we all arrive safely home.

A Sister in Christ

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476 thoughts on “An Open Letter to the Church from a Lesbian”

  1. Bruce Russell says:

    One really good music that Church music should not be light and fluffy.

    1. Patricia says:

      Huh??? Did you actually miss the topic?

      What does this have to do with anything? Additionally, your sentence doesn’t even make sense.

    2. TW says:

      Best comment on this page

  2. Keith Kraska says:

    “To those of us who know God’s word and will not dilute it to fit our desires …” Should that say WILL dilute it? Doesn’t seem to fit the rest of the paragraph.

    1. PL says:

      I had to re-read that sentence myself, thinking what you did. But no, she meant “will not,” referring to herself and others who refuse to compromise. Perhaps a better wording might have been, “On behalf of those of us who know God’s word and will not dilute it….” Overall a brave and encouraging letter.

    2. Brian says:

      She is saying that even though she has homosexual desires, she knows what the Word says, and she is not willing to dilute it to justify those desires. She has them, but she knows they are wrong, and the last thing she needs is for the church to tell her it’s okay in an effort to be politically correct.

      1. Dell Dodson says:

        If what you are saying is true, then she is NOT practicing homosexuality! The bible is talking to those who practice this immoral act both in their mind and their body. If she is in a warfare with this sin, or under condemnation over a past ‘act’ then she is in the same boat with the rest of the human race -regardless of the sin we are wrestling. All have sinned and come short of the glory of GOD. Faith in His name, ‘JESUS’ and faith in His blood is what sets us free. Rom 3:19 Now we know that whatever things the law saith, it saith to them who are under the law: that every mouth may be stopped, and all the world may become guilty before God.
        Rom 3:20 Therefore by the deeds of the law, there shall no flesh be justified in his sight: for by the law is the knowledge of sin.
        Rom 3:21 But now the righteousness of God without the law is manifested, being testified by the law and the prophets;
        Rom 3:22 Even the righteousness of God, which is by faith of Jesus Christ to all, and upon all them that believe; for there is no difference:
        Rom 3:23 For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God;
        Rom 3:24 Being justified freely by his grace, through the redemption that is in Jesus Christ:
        Rom 3:25 Whom God hath set forth to be a propitiation, through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of sins that are past, through the forbearance of God;
        Rom 3:26 To declare, I say, at this time his righteousness: that he may be just, and the justifier of him who believeth in Jesus.

        1. Michael Harder says:

          The issue I believe you are having is one that I personally encounter when dealing with a friend who would define himself as homosexual.

          He says that he is homosexual because of the homosexual desires, but I say that he is not because he does not put them into practice. In the same way, I believe the author is defining herself as homosexual because she has these desires, but you are defining homosexuals as those who practice it.

          I also believe that this is one of the largest issues in the dialogue within the Church on this subject, as one group will define homosexual with reference to action, and another with reference to desire.

          I would like to use an example in order to support my definition. I am personally a man who struggles a lot with lust. Jesus said that if a man lusts after a woman he has already committed adultery (Matthew 5:28). If I do not lust after a woman, but still have these intense desires to do so, it does not make me an adulterer. I view homosexuality as no different, your desire to act homosexually would not make you a homosexual until you act in accordance with it.

          On the surface, this difference in definition seems trivial, but it becomes much more important when you realize just how much damage it has done. A man calls himself gay because he desires to sleep with another man, the world tells him that being gay is just part of who he is. The Church condemns homosexuality, in accordance with the things they find in scripture, and they define homosexuality by action. Neither party clarifies their definition, and the man feels condemned by the Church because what he has been lead to believe is just a part of who he is, is under condemnation.

          Before dialogue can continue on this subject, both parties need to make their definitions clear, or people will just keep walking away from the Church under a false belief that the Church condemns who they are at their very core.

          1. lisa says:

            This is not the “typical” attitude of the gay and lesbian community. This girl is either struggling with desires that she has not given in to (or did but stopped and still struggles) or living in a lifestyle that is not making her happy or satisfied because she knows it’s against God’s word. At least from what I hear (albeit from media outlets)GLBT do not believe their lifestyle is wrong and just want everyone to accept it. I have no problem loving any of them…repentant or not, but that does not mean I accept their lifestyle or will say that it’s ok, just because I’m treating them kindly. Just as I don’t think it’s ok that a friend of mine’s son is living with his girlfriend (5 years). He is a Christian and just doesn’t think there’s anything wrong as long as they love each other…sorry.. I love my friend, but I do not accept his rationale. I also don’t like that my other friend eats too much and though he has undergone gastric bypass surgery, he continues to eat too much and has not lost the weight. That is– according to the Bible– a sinful lifestyle. I love him too…but I don’t love what he’s doing to his body. Bottom line is Sin is sin and truth is truth. We are to love one another and encourage each other in “the way”. It’s not easy, but it’s what we’re called to do.

            1. Michael Harder says:

              I would completely agree, but there are those who struggle in this way who don’t want to live the lifestyle, as evidenced by this very article. I do not accept the lifestyle either, and when my buddy who struggles in this way does slip up, I do not condemn him. I view such a lifestyle like I view my own history of alcoholism, and I can’t hate someone who is that much like me.

            2. Rachel says:

              Of course this is not the “typical” attitude of the gay and lesbian community according to the anti-Christian media, but it is far more common than you think for Christians who struggle with s.s.a. (same-sex attractions) to long for the church to deal with the issue in more Biblical ways… This is an excerpt from something I wrote about the same-sex attractions I struggled with.

              It is ever increasingly acceptable to call yourself a Christian and gay/lesbian, but conviction tells me that these words can’t be combined. There are two extreme groups in the Christian sphere. The more liberal side would say that they feel sorry for me that I will not go with what my heart tells me – that new revelation from God tells us that s.s. relationships are natural and can even be glorifying to God (or that this has always been the truth). Conservative Christians vary about how they approach this topic – outright condemning homosexuality, ignoring this topic to avoid controversy, or simply not knowing how to approach it. I have, however seen some good ministries out there for people with s.s.a., and have been blessed with a Pastor who did not focus on my apparent s.s.a., but on the hurt that may have caused me to seek after that which harmed me, the underlying problems that needed to be dealt with. I hope that, as my story and others like mine, surface, the church as a whole can work on developing greater ministries for those struggling with s.s.a. Many times, there is deep, underlying hurt. If the focus is shifted from dealing directly with the s.s.a. to ministering to the deep hurt and acknowledging how s.s.a. is a result of that hurt, I think many more people will be reached. It is also essential to surround the struggling person with a healthy and loving Christian family that can guide him/her towards healing and to the truth in God’s Word.

              1. Max says:

                Well said Rachel. Contextually sound too. All sin, however you define that, is the result of not understanding/experiencing God’s love/grace in some way.

                Some friends of mine once said, “What if God isn’t who we think He is… and neither are we.”

    3. Sally says:

      I read and wondered at that…but who knows the heart of this writer beyond what is written? God’s Word does not need to be diluted in any way in order for The Church to love ANY individual. Without any debate on if homosexuality is a “sin”, we Christ followers are still called to love. I don’t know about you, but personally I don’t want any of my sins to be written in sand for all to see…and not be loved in spite of that sin.

      1. Marilyn says:

        We can pretty much know her heart because out of the mouth [word] comes the overflow of the heart.

  3. Ray Ortlund says:

    Immanuel Church is one place, among others, where LGBT people can mingle with others to consider the real Jesus, without fear.

    1. Tony Romano says:


  4. T.Newbell says:

    Thank you for sharing. Praying for this: “We simply ask for the same support, love, guidance, and most of all hope that is given to the rest of your congregation.” This is possible in Christ! -Your sister

  5. Hi,
    your letter is brave and to a great extend true… though sad.

    I do not have all answers… but I might have hope (found in Christ… the undiluted one that is):

    I once was lesbian… God changed me. I chose God over a relationship to a woman… deciding that I want God more, even if my feelings might never change. But God showed grace and He changed me completely in this area!

    Be blessed… and know I’ll have coffee any time for I know how it felt!


    1. N. Anderson says:

      I, too, struggle with the same thing. Trying to fit into a church full of “normal” couples when there is nothing about me that is normal. Thank you for expressing so well those things that those of us who keep our “feelings” hidden and live an isolated life have not quite yet found a way to say.

      I would be honored to meet you for lunch or coffee – after all, we all are nothing more than sinners saved by His grace!

      1. Caree says:

        Thank you to both of you for your honesty with your struggle. May we never forget to continue to confess our sins to one another and bear each other’s burdens.

  6. Angela Davidson says:

    I love and agree with this letter. I believe most Christians would lovingly befriend Christians who struggled with homosexuality. However, I’m afraid that there is a difference between the sentiment of this writer and the “stereotypical” homosexual with which we are too painfully aware of, largely due to the media–that of the aggressive militant who will not stop until all Christians are wiped out or gleefully celebrate the homosexual lifestyle, even under the Christian banner. Any hatred or mocking Christians have done, though wrong, is I believe in reaction to the pressure we commonly feel is directed toward us and Christian beliefs to change or be labeled as homophobic, intolerant and yes, hateful. It will be important in the future that people who are investigating Christianity as homosexuals do feel the love of Christians, but also that communication remains open so that we can distinguish between those who struggle in this area who are submitting to the biblical mandate and seeking God’s grace to change, and those who insist on twisting or ignoring scripture in order to justify their lifestyle. She is right, we are all sinners and so must engage each other with humility, but neither must we compromise, on that of others’ sin or our own.

    1. Lisa says:

      Angela, you have said exactly what I have been feeling for several years but have not been able to say as eloquently as you have.

    2. Rose M says:

      I’ve been pondering this article since early this afternoon. I wanted to reply but wasn’t sure what I wanted to say. You [Angela] have said it succinctly so I’ll simply agree and say, “Thank you”.

    3. Diane says:

      Wait, are you seriously saying that this type of person exists: “aggressive [homosexual] militant who will not stop until all Christians are wiped out”?

      Because I’ve never met a gay person that wanted to wipe out Christians. In fact, I’ve never met a gay person who cared at all what Christians do, unless they themselves were Christians. A gay person is no more likely to want to murder Christians than any other (presumably) non-Christian; that is to say, there are jerks in every group and that doesn’t have anything to do with the group they belong to. I really hope you were just saying that that’s how you see homosexual people portrayed on the media (although that’s not a great thing either), and that this isn’t a personal belief of yours.

      1. Linda says:

        Unfortuately I have met a militant gay man who declared in a mutal work environment “I hate Christians. I wish we could just get rid of all of ‘em.” All I can assume is that he’s been emotionally scarred by a Christian in his past for being a gay man. I was shocked because I know him to be a fun, happy man with a generally bright outlook.
        However, his sentiment and the militant gay folks portrayed in the media are NOT my experience with the other gay folks I know, and that is a LOT! They are loving, kind, sweet, good, bad- in short everything everyone else I know represents.

        1. Ray says:

          I have met just such a person. On my college campus, this person was sharing how he would like to burn down churches of Christians and snipe the ones that got away. There were circles of folks around them, agreeing, and my professor did nothing to stop this. There certainly IS a sick and prevalent mindset towards Christians that, if shown to anyone else, would be scourged with cries of, “narrow minded monster!” In that moment, I simply said, “I’m not sitting here talking about burning down houses full of gays. So maybe you’re the narrow minded ones?” This militant monstrosity, it taints both sides. I’ve had many opportunities since to talk to and share the love of Christ with some of those students. One is even attending church now. God works mightily! I deeply, deeply enjoyed this article. It brought tears to my eyes.

          1. Marvin says:

            After reading several comments here, I never met nor heard of a homosexual that is seeking God wholeheartedly. I have plenty of argument in the last several days about the gay marriage. Yes, I’ve met a lot of those militant style, bible bashers myself which cause me to be always on my toe, my shield and defense always on high because I have seen people blasphemed, lied and deceives people…I thought this article wasn’t any different especially with the gay marriage right in all. I thought this was an attempt to infiltrate the church. After reading several comments though, All of my shield are down. I’m not any different than you are. I have my sins also that I don’t show, but I fight it EVERYDAY. I ask God to forgiveness all the time for my shortcoming. If I saw any of you, a warm welcome followed by the urge to keep on fighting. Anyone who seek God whole heartedly are my brother and sisters. Don’t be discourage, and Keep fighting, for our reward is in Heaven.

      2. Sarah says:

        I also know some homosexuals (two of which are in my extended family) who say they accept everyone (meaning everyone except believers), but they viciously attack Christians via social media, etc. Of course you can’t ever say that all people fit into a certain stereotype, but Angela did not say that every homosexual acted that way.

      3. Karen Butler says:

        Towards the end of the blog where the original letter was posted, a commenter named ‘Kyle’ has this observation:

        “I feel so sad for this woman. Brainwashed into thinking she is a sinner because of her nature. This cult needs to end.”

        The only way for this “cult to end” is to end the cultists,right?

        The imagination runs amok at all the possibilities. We already have mandatory diversity training in some corporations and in the military, and in the public schools. We have the ghettoizing of public opinion. What steps would be next, since the teachings are so virulently resistant to change? Real physical ghettos?

        1. Karen Butler says:

          But I feel great sympathy for this writer. I ‘came out’ as one who has struggled with a mental disorder, and there is such stigma attached to that label in the church. As well a general trend to minimize sin issues involved, and it all on genetics and brain chemistry.

          1. Karen Butler says:

            should read, “and blame it all on genetics or brain chemistry.”

          2. Mark says:

            Yes, we ignore and stigmatize those in the church who are hurting or wounded, yet we embrace and promote the “wolves in sheep’s clothing” because they are charming, attractive or, most importantly, have money! So disgusting…

          3. jason says:

            Being a homsexual is a disorder of the brain. You are not born this way.

      4. Fred says:

        You’ve never met a militant atheist then. I consider myself agnostic, live and let live. But there are people who actively seek to unmake religion and purge it from society and the face of the earth.
        A shining example of open-minded intolerance.

      5. David says:

        We {Christians} are all no more, no less, than sinners saved by the grace of God. None of us became perfect, {but under the covering of the blood of Jesus}, and until we are in glory with him us will continue to deal with our sinful nature, and the consequences of our sins. We must as Christ did – love the sinner – hate the sin; not only in our own lives, but in the lives of those we live around. There are many examples of ‘close’ as mankind sees it, but only one example of doing it right – Jesus. May God bless us all – WE ALL NEED IT!

    4. BC says:

      If God is on our side, what do we have to fear? (Consider what happened to the Roman Empire.) So saying that we, as Christians, will be loving to gay people only after they are loving to us is like a father saying that he will stop beating his child only after his child stops calling him bad names.

      Never mind the fact that, like Diane, I don’t find the gay persons I know any more anti-Christian than any other group of people.

      Never mind that even pagans know better than to sterotype in this way.

    5. SS says:

      Angela Davidson, I am a straight Evangelical male. You state that most of why Christians mock and hate homosexuals is in response to the aggression of the gay community. I would be VERY surprised to find that this was true. It would be almost as surprising to me as discovering that white racist views in the South originated in response to “uppity negroes.”

      1. Marie says:

        I live in San Francisco. The militancy here is extreme. We have picketers in front of churches, Roman Catholic masses invaded by drag queen “nuns” who upset communion, lesbian kiss-ins in front of churches, picketing and yelling in front of churches, and scenes in churches where homosexual activists attend and then, on a given signal, get up and walk out in unison or slam books together. Also, vandalism. A church in our city was set on fire (documented in the book “When the Wicked Seize A City,” also in the award winning documentary, “Shakeytown.” Death threats against pastors and their children have been commonplace. Increased activity when Prop 8 was on the ballot increased some of these behaviors. Frequent commenters on local news sites like to end with “Bring back the lions!” Hearings on homosexually sensitive issues like sex ed in the classroom bring out activists who hiss, scream, stand and turn their backs, and give Hitler salutes when Christians are taking their turn at the mic.

        Yes, when they have enough numbers they are VERY aggressive.

        1. apelila says:

          I agree. I’m in Santa Cruz. A name that means “Holy Cross” yet the presence of the evil of the LGBT groups and mindset far outweigh the the presence of God’s truth being taught in my local churches out of the fear of the backlash, I presume.

        2. Mark says:

          Thanks for clearly explaining what is going on in this country. Unfortunately, it is possible to be sheltered/ignorant enough to actually think people are making this militant activity up, and they love to feel superior in their ignorance by commenting that they have never seen/heard of such things and therefore those things must not exist and those who think they do are imagining things. Since we keep pointing out that all sin is the same, then since all sin originates with selfish and Satanic desires, how can we ignore that ALL sin seeks to destroy the sinner as well as anyone who gets in the way of stopping the sinner from getting what he wants? Only repentence can change this. Why do we think we have to watch out for liars, thieves, cheaters, gossipers, etc., but we don’t have anything to fear from the sexually immoral? You don’t think adultery hurts others, or rape, or sexual abuse, or homosexuality? The result of ALL sin is harm, to the sinner and to others. There is no such thing as sin that does no harm, and harm to anyone is harm to all of us. There is DEFINITELY a militant, very hateful, and violent component to the homosexual community, just like the drug community, the crime community, and so on. Not all the people in these communities are violent themselves, but just by being a part of it they support the violence that does come. Anyone wanting to keep their head in the sand does so at their own and their family’s peril. The Christian response, I think, is to face the truth, repent, and start living as we are commanded to live. It is our own faithlessness and hypocrisy that has helped lead us to this state of affairs.

          1. Katie says:

            The Homosexual agenda is frightening, They are violent and abusive to others in the community. Do not be fooled God is not Mocked. Everyone struggles with sin, some of it sexual in nature. If you act on these sinful Impulses you do so at your own spiritual expense.
            Trust no one, keep your children safe, keep praying. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
            having been attacked by homosexual men, yes I am afraid for our society. leave them alone, if someone is entertaining the idea of sin, turn away from them, dont blame it on Genetics or anything else, IT is sin, and the Wages of sin is death. All I can say to people who are Gay or who are letting the idea roll around in their heads is this, stop playing with fire you Will get burned. Stop thinking about this sin , dont give any place to it. Ask Jesus to help you, repent and turn away from your sin.

        3. Jamie says:

          Just realize that the world will only fill with more evil and hatred as the end times get nearer. I like ot look at things like this, and struggles and think “This is just God giving me another opportunity to grasp onto him.”

    6. Walter says:

      The problem the writer has (and those who agree with her have) is in defining homosexuality as a sin. To sin is to make a choice to do something which is against the Law – the Ten Commandments handed down to Moses by God in first of just two encounters with mankind. Nowhere in the Ten Commandments is there any admonishment of homosexuality and, in fact, the ONLY prohibition having anything to do with human sexuality is: “Thou shalt not commit adultery.” For Christians, God’s second and only other direct encounter with mankind was the Incarnation – Jesus the Christ. Of His life, there are four different accounts (albeit with some similarities) in which Jesus’ words and teaching cover a broad range of human endeavors, activities, contradictions and complexities. Here again, there are NO admonishments from Jesus on the entire subject of human sexuality, let alone homosexuality in particular. IF homosexuality is a sin and neither God in the Ten Commandments nor God Incarnate -Jesus- made ANY reference to or admonishment of homosexuality in the two great encounters with mankind, then it follows that either homosexuality is NOT a sin, or that a supposedly omniscient god somehow forgot to address the subject, not just in His Commandments but also during His entire 33-years on earth. And if homosexuality is not a sin, then the writer (and all who agree with her) have no reason either to charitably tolerate the homosexual or to seek repentance and forgiveness for being homosexual. However, if homosexuality really is a sin and God somehow forgot to personally issue edicts to that effect, then we must believe in an absentminded god who couldn’t really be bothered (TWICE!) to address the issue, leaving it to others (prophets and saints) to dispense His divine wisdom by whatever means they (supposedly) come by that wisdom. You can’t have it both ways! So take your pick: either homosexuality is NOT a sin or God is an absentminded fool. Lastly, homosexuals who choose to live charitable and loving lives as Christians do so (just like heterosexual Christians) within the parameters of GOD’s Laws, not those interpreted and dispensed by self-anointed prophets, scribes, rabbis, saints, teachers, preachers, priests, pontiffs and (let’s not forget) pundits. “Love God and Love Your Neighbor as yourself.” It’s quite simple really. Loving God and loving your neighbor means staying out of other people’s business and stop being judgmental. And loving yourself means accepting that God in His infinite wisdom created you heterosexual AND homosexual as His intended and in His image, so go forth and lead a godly life as best you possibly can. Amen.

      1. Apologista says:

        Walter, you must have noticed time and time again, that God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit inspired Word of God all use the words Bride and Bridegroom over and over again. So using your logic, since there is absolutely no mention ever of a “bride and bride” or “groom and groom”, sanctioned by God, then it must not be in His divine plan at all. Therefore, since it is not in His plan for a man to marry a man, or a woman to marry a woman, then any sex they have would be out of wedlock, regardless of what a man on earth says. And God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit inspired Word of God have condemned sex outside of the holy bond of Marriage between a man and woman, groom and his bride, would be sin. Clearly.

        1. Apologista says:

          Should read “So that it would be sin”

  7. Deborah says:

    When Jesus was on the cross dying to take on & take away the sins of the world – past, present, & future – He saw each one of us! No sin is better or worse…..sin is going against God. This post comes at an interesting time in my life — Do I truly love ALL as Jesus loves All? Most days, I can honestly say yes! But I have dark days when I am also NOT in any way like Jesus because I judge and am angry by influences, lifestyles, choices, thinking, peer pressure, injustice, and the myriads of sin that destroys lives, relationships, and families. This cuts me deeply and leaves me powerless, sickened, and full of self-loathing. I hate satan and the way of his schemes – which are nothing new, just a different twist – I yearn for my real home with Jesus, but mourn for those who still do not know Him. Dear Anonymous, you are eternally loved by Jesus….I love you as well, but will fail you…and for that I am truly sorry….please forgive me :( a Mom with a broken heart

    1. mrsdkmiller says:

      Deborah, I hear you… because I struggle with the same judgmental, pharisaical sin. I will pray for you; please pray for me. And we will both pray for Anonymous.

    2. Debbie says:

      Deborah thank you. i too want to love everybody.but i too judge people,i too get angry by the same things you mention.then i get angry with myself.for feeling this way. i pray Jesus will change me to be more like Him.dear anonymous God does love you,thank you for your letter,brings a whole new perspective to me.I woul have coffe with you anytime.may Jesusus give you peace.May Jesus forgive me.

  8. Well said author! Bottom line, Love, Unconditional love!! That comes only through Jesus Christ or Lord and Savior. He’s the only one that can love perfectly to bring change, all for His glory!

  9. M. MacDonald says:

    It is NOT about church…church members…men…women…OR …LGBT !!!!! It IS about you and your SIN nature………not sins you have committed or struggle with. ‘We are crucified with Christ , yet not I but Christ live to in me…….’ …….stop complaining about how you perceive ‘they’ are being treated by the so-called-church and LIVE in Christ…..regardless of the persecution!!!!

    1. Bekah Mason says:

      So the feelings and emotions with which God created us, created us in our image in fact, should be discounted? Where in Scripture does it say to suck it up and just deal with persecution?

      There are many more places which talk about the God who is heartbroken over the pain of his children, who catches our tears in a bottle, who hears our cries and comforts us in times of affliction.

      In Scripture, we read that Jesus is seated at the right hand of the Father, but how did Stephen see Jesus when the heavens opened before him at his stoning. Jesus was standing. I’d like to think standing up FOR Stephen, on his behalf as he was persecuted.

      We can live in Christ, walk in obedience and still be brokenhearted over the treatment we have received as Christians who have or are struggling with LGBT temptation. Those who do not struggle with that particular temptation show overwhelming compassion and love (the love of Christ) when they intentionally reach out and say “I love you anyway” because those in the LGBT community have heard nothing but the exact opposite from the church for generations.

      This woman is speaking for THOUSANDS of people in our churches, and it’s time to acknowledge that such thoughtless and heartless statements made about “they” tear at the hearts and the hope of those who already feel like an outcast.

      Praying that you see that it is not about the sin, you’re right about that, but about the church’s response to this particular sin, and the emotional damage that response has inflicted on those who fight the good fight against it.

      1. Chad says:

        Of course we love them the same way we love other sinners in our churches. There can be no excuse made for sin though. God didn’t create in us feelings of sexual immorality. That is a result of the fall and therefore sin. I am all about loving the LGBT community but loving them doesn’t equal tolerating their sin.

        If a man in our church was sexually abusing children we wouldn’t tolerate that. We would love him but discipline and repentance would be expected.

        If a gay man wants to come to me for council, I would surely do that. But, I would expect him to come in repentance and be committed to flee from sexual immorality.

        I think way too many people confuse love and acceptance with tolerance of sin.

        1. riley says:

          The author of this letter did not ask for the acceptance of the sin she’s struggling with though.

        2. Josiah says:

          How dare you.

          The first time I realized I liked other little boys I was six, and I was watching a disney movie and realized I wanted to marry the prince, not the princess.

          I. Was. Six. Now just like you, I have a strong drive to be in close relationships with other people. I want to love and be loved. I wish I could just direct my attraction towards women, but it is not that simple. Where would you begin if someone told you to start being attracted to other men?

          So I am left with the choice of living in sin or living every waking moment tormented by a crushing, piercing loneliness that has driven several of my christian gay friends to suicide.

          Tell me I’m sinful, because I am. You can tell me I must not have changed because I haven’t really submitted my life to God’s will, maybe its true. But please do NOT lump me in with pedophiles. Try to have a little empathy. At the end of the day this isn’t about sex, I can live without sex, this is about someone’s natural inclination to love, not an abusive perversion.

          1. Katy says:

            Your story is so sad and I am so sorry.
            I wish I could have been your mother when you were six – I only say this because I have young sons and daughters and I know the power of wise parenting.

            I would have helped you to understand that it is NORMAL for a six year old boy to feel attracted to the prince. It wasn’t sexual – six year olds do not have an awakened sexuality yet (unless they have been awakened by molestation, and I’m not saying you were).

            Young boys naturally yearn for masculinity, not some silly princess! That does not mean they are gay. It means they need a strong, loving father figure to mentor them and be their hero, and a wise mama who can consistently affirm their God-given sexual identity from the outset, and not allow Satan to get a foothold into childish vulnerabilities and cause deadly confusion.

            There is a way out. There is deliverance and healing of your mind and heart. I am praying for you.

            1. Brandon says:

              Again, how dare you? You cast aspersions on this man’s mother as though you know her. You can’t know anything about Josiah’s family and the way in which he was nurtured as a child. Do you really believe that in a hyper-sexualized society like ours six year old boys don’t know anything about sexuality? You make many assumptions about the nature of development and sexuality and then draw conclusions from your assumptions. Have you studied this issue at any length?

              The fact is that there may very well be a genetic component. The fact is that I have met very few homosexuals who “chose” their orientation, and I live in one of the most gay friendly cities of one of the most gay friendly states in the country. I find it ridiculous that so many here claim that God would not create someone with homosexual desires and then go on to state that our human natures are fallen. They don’t seem to grasp that if our whole beings are subject to the Fall, then even our genetics are affected. Then there’s Paul’s “thorn.” Might homosexual desires not be a result of Fallen genetics as much as the sinful nature? Might homosexual desires not be a “thorn” that some must bear?

              If this is the case, then “deliverance and healing” cannot be promised. Rather, we must bear with our LGBT brothers and sisters, enacting Christlike compassion and recognizing that the simple solutions we have traditionally advocated are empty and have led only to alienation. We need to recognize the complexity of the issue and in empathy join our brothers and sisters not in accepting sin, but in “fighting the good fight,” recognizing that total victory only comes after this life.

              1. Katy says:

                Dear Brandon, and anyone else who may be concerned,
                I have no heart to cast aspersions on anyone’s mother. I speak from a heart that is passionate to save children from any more life-long grief and trauma than is completely unavoidable. I experienced this issue in my own childhood. I shared some of my personal story elsewhere in these comments: But for the right intervention, my life may have taken a different turn. I have also seen this principle in action in the lives of other children (I am a mother of six and former pastor’s wife/theology student).

                If you acknowledge that we live in a fallen world I would plead with you to consider the possibility that some children, from a VERY young age, may have identity confusion because of ENVIRONMENT, PERSONALITY, STRESSORS and other factors. Plus, if you believe in a devil, you may agree that he will do whatever he can to mess up little lives, and so he throws things into the mix. Like encounters with a hyper-sexualized society. Sadly, a spirit of lust can be introduced at a very young age.

                Children can be ‘conditioned’. Adult responses to children are EXTREMELY influential. “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” Pr.22:6 CHILDREN NEED GUIDANCE in every area of their lives, including their developing sexual and gender identities. They are like tender plants that need a greenhouse and a stake to help them grow as they were designed to. In a fallen world, sadly there are many parents who do not have the skills or wisdom to guide their children. I do not speak with condemnation. I am a broken person like any other. I speak in the hope of saving other children.

                Our adult responses to children will be determined by our beliefs. If we BELIEVE (or even fear) that being gay is genetic or unavoidable, we are encouraging a child to believe that is WHO THEY ARE. A same-sex attraction is a misplaced sexual attraction and there are many forms of misplaced sexual attraction in the world. When 1 Co.6:11 says, “such as some of you were”, God’s Word is showing that transformation is possible. If you deny this you are taking away HOPE for these suffering brothers and sisters (as the original letter we were discussing says). “You shall know the truth and the truth will set you free.” Jn.8:32

                If our little boys have delicate traits, why do we assume they are gay? I think that is wrong. We are placing our assumptions on them and they will believe it and the devil will get his hooks in quick smart. Of course, there are many other ways and means that the devil uses to get his hooks in, not just parents’ responses.

                We should affirm our little boys in their masculine identity, and it takes great wisdom to do this. It is not about crushing their personality. Some men are gentle, artistic, studious. Some are athletic and adventurous. Same with our girls. A ‘tomboy’ girl doesn’t mean she is gay. But her femininity needs to be wisely nurtured.

                If it is too late for gentle-but-firm gender-identity guidance and the actual sexual attraction to the same sex has taken root, (rather than a non-sexual attraction which is quite normal) it becomes a much more complicated issue due to the extremely addictive nature of sexual attraction. There are Christian professionals who can help those who want to be helped, like there are for any addictive issue.

                Yes, some people may struggle with this their whole lives, and it is their thorn in the flesh. Fellow Christians need to love them as they would any other Christian. I have intense compassion for a Christian who is struggling with same-sex attraction.

                Sorry this is so long. I hope you can hear my heart in the limitations of a comments box.

      2. Clark says:

        Where in Scripture does it say to suck it up and just deal with persecution?

        Matt 5:39 maybe?
        But I still agree with your note.

    2. riley says:

      Excuse me, sunshine, but this is a repentant woman struggling w/ her sinful nature. She needs a church that will help to support her in a life of sanctification & in bearing her burden. A church that gives preferential treatment to other “non-gay” sinners don’t take care & feed particular sheep in the congregation, but rather abuse them. By the logic of Jesus’ command to Peter in John 21, the love of certain people in the church towards God, is hugely questionable.

  10. lyn says:

    There is no mention of repentance from her. I also am deeply troubled by this statement, ‘Like you, we have invited Jesus into our hearts.’ This is not the Gospel at all, sinners are saved by grace, not by a work. You will not find that anywhere in scripture. If there are indeed homosexuals in the church, they must be handled biblically. If they refuse to repent, then this verse must be followed,”If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.” Matthew 18:17. Commentary from John Gill says ” The meaning of this is, cease to have religious contact with him, or to acknowledge him as a Christian brother. It does not mean that we should cease to show kindness to him and aid him in affliction or trial, for that is required toward all people; but it means that we should disown him as a Christian brother, and treat him as we do other people not connected with the church. This should not be done until all these steps are taken. This is the only way of kindness. This is the only way to preserve peace and purity in the church.”

    As a former lesbian saved by God’s grace, I think there are some truths to what is stated here, I put up a post concerning speaking truth to homosexuals at

    1. Andrew says:

      I think the fact that she recognizes homosexual practice as “sin” and obviously struggles against it, is repentance. “Not repentant” would mean that she doesn’t think there is anything wrong with it and/or goes on practicing homosexuality. Am I wrong?

      Also, yeh, the language about asking Jesus into your heart. It’s become fashionable to rail against that. Sometimes that is just the way that people communicate the fact that they know him and love him. Just because its not the words used in the Bible doesn’t necessarily make it wrong.

      1. Lori says:

        I don’t know: I’d tend to think that unrepentent refers to somebody who knows that what they are doing is wrong but doesn’t care. I have areas where I sometimes find myself in unrepentent sin: I know it’s wrong for me to yell at my children, or covet, or gossip, but I do it anyway, because I want to. I’ll thankfully feel conviction at some point, but I can continue to do things I know are wrong without feeling badly about it for quite some time.

        On the other hand, there are things that I do not believe are sin that other people I know believe are sin, and vice versa. I don’t unrepentently watch R-rated movies or drink wine, because I don’t believe that watching an R-rated movie or having a glass of wine is a sin. I’m acting on a different set of convictions and, while I understand that others may think those things are sin and understand why they think that, I feel they are areas for disagreement. I realize it’s a wildly unpopular view here, but increasingly homosexuality–like other issues have before it that we now fully accept as areas where people of Christian conscience can disagree–is seen as an area where there are different interpretations and where Christians can come to differing conclusions.

        So I don’t think that a person who sincerely believes, after serious prayer and study that homosexuality is not in and of itself a sin is unrepentent, even if they are mistaken. I’d say that a person who believes it is a sin but doesn’t care, or who doesn’t care whether or not it’s a sin is unrepentent.

        1. Andrew says:

          Lori, you’ve given me a lot to think about. My first reaction is that I can’t understand how anyone could read verses like 1 Cor 6:9 and come away with the idea that practicing homosexuality is acceptable. My first reaction is that the Holy Spirit can not be with them. That seems like quite an arrogant stance. I can’t get over that the absolute opposition to homosexual practice seems entirely explicit in the scriptures.

          I do agree for sure that there are more open handed issues out there that are a sin for some and not for others (in agreement with Paul), such as the examples you listed about alcohol and R rated movies.

          1. Annie says:

            There are several places where you can view an alternate reading of all the scriptures addressing homosexuality. The first two that come to mind are “Fish out of Water,” a documentary a lesbian Christian made about her faith journey (it is streaming on Netflix), and “Torn” a book by Justin Lee, a gay Christian and the president of the Gay Christian Network. Incidentally, the GCN is a brilliant example of a place where Christians whose consciences disagree on the matter of homosexuality can meet, confer, and participate in positive support for LGBT Christians.

            I think the most positive thing about seeing alternative understanding of scripture on the relevant passages is not the possibility that your mind will be changed on those passages, but that you may see people holding those alternative views are not simply ignoring the Bible, but striving to adhere to its teachings just like you do.

            1. Rachel says:

              Annie, I am glad you brought this up. I have been studying these things for a better part of a year. In fact, this past week I listened to a local rabbi do a teaching on the “clobber” verses in the Old Testament (Torah)that are used against gays. It was fascinating and enlightening.

              In his opening remarks, Rabbi Ed said, “I am a little bit sick and tired of people taking my text, people who don’t know what they are talking about, and then claiming that it says something other than it actually says. People will take it and not only misinterpret it, but attach to it their own political or moral agenda, and then claim that that’s in my text, when they don’t even know the first word of Hebrew. They can’t even read it…but they “know” what’s in my text.”

              I have to say that this has been quite a journey for me. My eyes have been opened and my heart has been broken for the LGBT community where so many turn from Jesus because, well, why wouldn’t they? I’ve heard the horror stories firsthand about how Christians and churches have treated gay people. It is wrong. Please, please open your hearts to the possibility that evangelical thought and teaching could be wrong on this issue.

              1. Hodge says:

                Unfortunately, it’s your rabbi friend who doesn’t get it. His insinuation that the Hebrew reads something different enough to change the orthodox view of homosexuality only sounds good to ears that don’t know Hebrew. Those who do know it take that appeal as a joke, as though your friend has secret knowledge that lets him in on something others don’t realize. I not only know Biblical Hebrew, I’ve taught it at the seminary level, and he doesn’t have any more knowledge than the average English reader might have. What he does have is a lack of knowledge as to why those texts exist. They are founded upon the creation principle of Scripture, and to reject them is to reject the entirety of biblical morality. I’d find a better teacher than a rabbi void of the Word and Spirit.

              2. Chris says:

                So the Rabbi is sick of people taking “his” text and claiming it says something other than what it says? “HIS” text? I thought we were talking about the word of God here…frankly, I am a bit sick and tired of people taking GOD’s text and claiming it says that sin is ok, and that whatever anyone wants to do is just fine and dandy with God as long as it makes you feel good. Those currying favor with gays either desperately need their support for something (money, votes, power) or they have a loved one who is gay and they HAVE to show support or get shunned.

            2. Clark says:

              Unfortunately those ‘alternate readings’ are just not based on good translation. They are looking to water down what is actually said. People can try to do this but it is just poor scholarship. Look at the basic teaching of scripture if no where else: That sex outside of marriage is sin and that God joined a man and a woman together to be the first marriage of scripture. Jesus even described that event as the normative standard, ‘that a man shall leave his mother and father and cleave to his wife.’ Matt 19:5.

            3. Marie says:

              Shall we say the same for fornicators (those having sex outside of marriage?)

              Shall we say the same for adulterers? Can we be unrepentant fornicators or adulteres, yet still be Christians? Can we be porn viewers, or producers? Or is it just homosexual sexual sin that gets a pass now?

              1. Harry Ferguson says:

                Marie, you’re so right. Homosexual sin is no worse than fornication, porn viewing or producing. I’d say producing porn or exploiting prostitutes is a lot worse, actually. But God is the only Judge.

              2. Chris says:

                Right on, Marie! Yes, we could “re-interprete” the whole Bible if we really put our minds to it! People have been doing it for centuries. But scripture proves scripture, and the Bible re-iterates God’s truths and does not contradict itself, as so many would like to thing. “Let God be true, and every man a liar”!

      2. Tamara Omtvedt says:

        Repentance does not merely mean being “sorry.” It means “regret.” If one is still caught up in a homosexual lifestyle, there does not appear to be any regret.

    2. Lori says:

      I disagree. Our Methodist church turns away no one. You are saying that because she sins by being a lesbian, she should be turned away? We all sin, every single day, for many, the same sin over again. Does this mean we should be turned away at the door? NO, it should be opened WIDER. I have had gay friends and I’ve never thought less of them because they were so.

    3. lindimity says:

      Wow. You are saying this woman is not repentant because she doesn’t use the right words to suit you?? This woman is turning away from a sin whose temptation is ever before her (repentance). She has ‘said the right words’ to God, the only one who counts, and she is asking for help and understanding from other members of His Church, who have their own sins to repent of. My prayer is hers: that the people of God would show love and acceptance to all of His people (not condoning any of their sins)as we all work toward allowing Him to make us like Him. God bless you Sister.

      1. Yvonne says:

        Thank you, Lindimity, for your Christ-like heart.

        love to all through my Lord and Saviour

    4. holly says:

      I am in total agreement with you,why? Because this is truth,the word,scripture,if the situation doesnt line up then it isnt truth,God is love YES,but hates sin,and repentance means to go the other way,The entrance into the kingdom of God is through the sharp, sudden pains of repentance colliding with man’s respectable “goodness.” Then the Holy Spirit, who produces these struggles, begins the formation of the Son of God in the person’s life (see Galatians 4:19). This new life will reveal itself in conscious repentance followed by unconscious holiness, never the other way around. The foundation of Christianity is repentance. Strictly speaking, a person cannot repent when he chooses— repentance is a gift of God. The old Puritans used to pray for “the gift of tears.” If you ever cease to understand the value of repentance, you allow yourself to remain in sin. Examine yourself to see if you have forgotten how to be truly repentant.

    5. Yvonne says:

      Dearest sister Lyn, please remember that our Lord died for EACH one of.

      I fear for you and others who are so harsh and Pharasaical in their thinking. Thank God that you were given enough grace to overcome your sin. Where is the humbleness in receiving this grace? I do not see it in condemning another who obviously has a judgement about her sinful nature and cries out for grace and mercy from the Body of Christ.

      Love to you,through our Gentle Shepherd,Our Chief Musician,the “Sweet Psalmist” of Israel.

  11. Deb says:

    I agree, there should be no compromise with ANY of our sin, Sister! You are so much more than a lesbian. I pray that you will begin to grow and understand that every time we confess, God is faithful and just to forgive us and to CLEANSE us. Sometimes the dirt is pretty caked on, and it takes several baths to get completely clean. Eventually, we spend more of our time thanking, praising and serving Him than confessing. We need to be willing to be held accountable by one another. Also remember that God will always finish what he starts in us. It always takes a lifetime.

  12. April F says:

    This is a very well written letter, and I agree with most of it. The only comment I have is, that just because she struggles with these temptations doesn’t make her a lesbian. I think that term ought to be reserved for people who don’t think homosexual acts are sins. Everyone who loves the Lord struggles with temptation from time to time, and may fall sometimes, but do we take on the label of liar, cheater, adulterer? No, and neither should she. We have a higher calling, and those labels shouldn’t be the fate of those who look to Jesus for their hope and forgiveness, because in our spiritual nature we don’t approve of those things at all. To those who are feeling what this lady feels – you are loved and wanted. The rest of the believers share in the struggle to be honest about sin in our lives.

    1. talkback says:

      April F. Great comment. I was going to say the same thing. No labels, we all all sinners and a sin is a sin. The difference in her stance is that she is trying to live through Christ in not practicing that sin, which is wonderful! We can all learn a lot from her and her struggle. To those people who think she is unrepentant, I didn’t get that out of this letter. I pray and I KNOW the Holy Spirit is going to keep guiding her until these desires are nothing to her anymore. Great letter.

    2. Bethany Nash says:

      Well said, April.

  13. Ronald says:

    i agree with her statement however what concerns me is and i Quote “To those of you who would change the church to accept the gay community and its lifestyle”. what lifestyle is she ta;king about , if it is sexual sin then NO the gay community cannot be accepted neither is living in any sin accepted

    1. lyn says:

      We must give truth, but we must never compromise either.

      I have repeatedly heard of those who claim Christ and yet ‘struggle’ with homosexuality. Doesn’t Christ say ‘if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed’? How can you struggle with something Christ has freed you from? Something does not add up there. That is not to say born from above followers of Christ do not sin, however, it isn’t habitual like it once was, nor does it have us in bondage.
      She also claims this “When the word “homosexual” is mentioned in the church, we hold our breaths and sit in fear. Most often this word is followed with condemnation, laughter, hatred, or jokes.” I can say, that has never happened in my church. Sin is preached, and the necessity of repentance is proclaimed. No one sees sin as a joke; I think this may be a bit of a stretch on her part.

      It seems she is looking for acceptance on the grounds of other sins the church supposedly ‘allows’. She’s right, most churches in America tolerate all kinds of sin and do not practice church discipline..and it’s come back to haunt them.

      “We do not ask for your acceptance of our sins any more than we accept yours.” Sin, in whatever form, should never be accepted. Sin must be forsaken, there must be a daily repentance of it. We do not take sin seriously, we do not take offending our holy God seriously if we continue to feed upon lustful thoughts and act upon those thoughts.

      1. Sonya says:

        Reading this letter has been for me an eye opener, simply because I have not been around any Christians who have turned from homosexual sin (that I know of). I certainly hope that if I am in the future that I would welcome them as a friend and sister/brother in Christ.

        In reply to Lyn, I don’t think she is stretching the truth. Friends in my church communities have often made many “gay” jokes and I think that it is out of immaturity and inexperience in confronting this specific sin. It’s easier to laugh at something then to take it seriously.

        Also I think that she is very specifically saying that the other sins she mentioned are very much sins and should NOT be accepted From my perspective, she is taking this very seriously.

        And to your previous comment on whether she is truly repentant and saved by grace since she says she invited Jesus into her heart, I beg you to consider that this is not the place to be arguing her sincerity or whether she is saved by grace. Many Christians use phrases such as “invite Jesus into my heart” and mean that Jesus Christ has saved them, the Holy Spirit has worked in their hearts and finally because of that we can welcome God as Lord of our lives.

        Dear author, thank you for your open letter and it is my prayer that as a church we can continue to look to God and His Word for answers and maturity in handling all things with love.

      2. Struggling says:

        Lyn I’ve never met any Christian who has claimed not to struggle with sin, and if they did I wouldn’t believe them. Before we were saved we were enslaved and surrendered to sin, and now we fight and struggle against it to become more Christ-like.

        We will struggle against sin and temptation until the New Creation.
        A wise man once told me it’s a dead fish that swims with the tide.

        1. lyn says:

          If you struggle with homosexuality, or any sin, then you need to study the doctrine of repentance. I NEVER said Christians do not sin, I did say struggling with sin, in this case, the same besetting sin that once held this woman in bondage, goes against what the Lord teaches.

          1. Andrew says:


            Certainly if someone gives lip service to repentance and uses the idea of struggling as an excuse to indulge sin that is contrary to the teaching of the Lord. However it is not contrary to the teaching of the Lord to affirm that Christians sometimes fall into sins they have formally repented of and have several times before finally conquering that sin.

            Here’s the Westminster Confession on Sanctification, “This sanctification is throughout, in the whole man; yet imperfect in this life, there abiding still some remnants of corruption in every part: whence ariseth a continual and irreconcilable war; the flesh lusting against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh. In which war, although the remaining corruption, for a time, may uch prevail; yet through the continual supply of strength from the sanctifying Spirit of Christ, the regenerate part doth overcome; and so, the saints grow in grace, perfecting holiness in the fear of the Lord.”

            1. jennifer adkins says:

              Paul himself claimed a “thorn in the flesh”… I have often heard this interpreted as a sin that he may have struggled with…

          2. Jeff Dovalovsky says:

            Romans 8:13 – “If ye through the spirit do mortify the deeds of the body ye shall live.”

            As John Owen noted in “The Mortification of Sin”, “He that is appointed to kill an enemy, if he leave striking before the other ceases living, does but half his work.” We already agreed that Christians are not completely free from sin.

            It follows that if we cease to struggle against sin, even when we have already obtained freedom from it, we have ceased striking too early.

          3. Ruby says:


            Maybe I can explain this for you. I am a woman. I am happily married to and raising children with a man, but I am sexually attracted to women as well. In my younger days, before I was married, I acted on these feelings and had a sexual relationship with another young woman, as well as consumed pornography geared that way. I did not feel there was anything wrong with those actions, and in fact felt encouraged by my (extremely liberal) community to explore, affirm and accept my bi-sexual orientation. Since then, I have become a Christian and I understand the sinfulness of acting on those desires. This is the important part, though–repenting for my sinful actions does not magically make my sinful desires disappear. The struggle is to not act on them. I don’t know why God allows me to feel the feelings that I do, of attraction to women, but he never promised any of us that he would take away our desires to do evil. Some people–even Christians who are trying to live in a Christian manner–desire to lie, some to cheat, some to steal, some to rape, some to murder, some to gossip, some to have sex with people of the same or different gender they are not married to. Having those desires to sin–and struggling against them–is the condition of fallen man.

            1. Brad says:

              Thank you, Ruby. You expressed what I was thinking perfectly. Struggling with my homosexual feelings doesn’t (for me) mean I am struggling with whether or not they’re sinful; it means being at war with my flesh, in the same way (in a sense) that I struggle with my pride or my laziness. I know all of these things to be sin, but I am yet a sinner. A redeemed sinner, who is continually being sanctified by the blood of Jesus, and in that truth is hope.

              1. Yvonne says:

                Dear Brad,
                Thanks for sharing your truth and a biblically sound testimony regarding struggling with sin. We are ALL sinners saved by grace. There is indeed Hope, and Faith, and most of all LOVE! I am thankful for:

                The Redemptive Power of God’s Love


            2. S says:

              Thank you, Ruby, for enriching this discussion with your perspective. I hope every single person who reads the article reads your comment. In my opinion, you are right on target. Thank you for your courage and commitment to Christ. And for the humanity and grace with which you speak in an otherwise very heated forum.

        2. Yvonne says:

          Lyn,dear girl! “If you struggle with homosexuality, or any sin, then you need to study the doctrine of repentance.”??
          You are surely not suggesting the study of doctrine will free you from struggling with sin? If the study of doctrine is what freed you personally from this sin, then may I cautiously suggest that you have replaced one sin with another? Studying doctrine is of course not wrong, but the actual study of it does not free you from sin. Is there a possibility that you have overcome homosexual tendencies with an obsession of studying doctrine? Please, for your soul’s sake, do not make this type of study become a “law” unto it’s self. You are merely replacing one sin with another.
          love to you always, through Jesus, the Saviour of the body.

      3. Clark says:

        How can you struggle with something Christ has freed you from?

        WOW, you must be practically perfect in every way!

        I for one still struggle with temptation, but there will come a day, in glory, when even temptation will be done away with.

    2. Andrew says:

      Ronald, the author agrees with you. That whole paragraph is about how people who are trying to “accept the gay community and its lifestyle” are wrong to do so.

    3. talkback says:

      Hi Ronald. She was saying that the church should not change it’s teaching in order to attract or be PC with the homosexual lifestyle and that those who do make this lifestyle acceptable aren’t really helping them in their struggle.

  14. Lori says:

    Dear Sister,

    Thank you for this interesting letter. It is so important to listen humbly and seek to learn, especially from those inside the body of Christ.

    I recognize many truths within your letter. True: those redeemed in Christ do sin. True: homosexuality is a sin, and one of many sins Christians struggle with. I also agree that the standards in scripture should not be deluded to appease those who find it expedient or politically-correct to disavow the scriptural standard which deems homosexual behavior a sin.

    Within my immediate family, there are 3 members who struggle with homosexual proclivities and temptations. Two of them are committed Christians, and believe giving into their homosexual desires is a sin. One of them no longer agrees that homosexuality is a sin, and no longer considers himself a Christian, largely because of his inability to reconcile his behavior to his believes.

    It seems the Church largely does little preaching about sin in its various specific forms, and offers little support to individuals who battle with specific sins, such as gluttony, addiction, infidelity, homosexuality, to name a few. There seems to be more of an emphasis on showing who Jesus is, and what scripture says about repentance and the good news of the gospel. This has been my experience, and it is not a bad goal of course.

    I have noticed a perception by some inside and outside of the church, that believers judge harshly everyone but themselves, and hold themselves up as having no problems, temptations, or failures. I suppose some people come across as just so “perfect” and self-satisfied. We need to be careful about this though, as you yourself may appear this way to someone in the pew behind you, just because your inadequacies and temptations are not immediately obvious to others.

    As a body of believers, we need to walk in humble gentleness, aware that we are all sinners and are in need of the grace of God to be saved. As believers within the church, we need to be careful about judging others who may be sitting in the next pew, just as this writer is judging others within the church based on what she is perceiving on the surface. Both sides are judging, it seems. We will always be found wanting but for the grace of Christ.

    1. Jordan says:

      To me, it seems like you really read this letter right. Thanks for your loving reply…perhaps the anonymous writer will see it! I agree with your assessment and your response. Very well said.

    2. Lori says:

      My goodness! This is exactly right! Brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for writing what I could not express!

    3. Paul says:

      If your church does not preach about sin, go to your pastor and share your concern about it. If you are speaking about other churches, you should not, because how do you know what is taught in other churches if you do not attend them. If people say to you, bad things about other churches, isn’t that gossip? Tell the person to go to their pastor and share their concerns with them. In this way the church is built up, and you do not need to fear taking part in gossip.

    4. Tara says:

      Well said.
      Thankfully my church DOES preach about sin, and takes nothing from nor adds anything to what the Bible says about it. Unfortunately, many churches do dilute the gospel to suit what society deems ok, which, basically, is false teaching. And there are many false teachers these days; that’s why praying for discernment is so important.

  15. Allison says:

    When I hear that someone “struggles” with a particular sin – be it homosexuality or any other sin – my thought is that they’re voicing an area that continues to be a point of temptation. We have no excuse and are to be held accountable when we give in to temptation and choose to sin. However, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being a Christian and admitting that you continue to face certain temptations. I agree with you and the author that sin should not be accepted. I think it’s also important to differentiate between sin and temptation. Jesus was tempted in the wilderness and did not sin.

    We are made free in Christ, but while we’re on Earth, we are not fully sanctified and will continue to sin. But the beauty of the gospel is that, in Christ, the sins we will continue to commit are forgiven and through the power of the Holy Spirit we can grow in repentance and holiness.

    1. Allison says:

      was in reply to lyn’s comment in reply to Ronald :)

    2. lyn says:

      I agree, our battle against sin is lifelong. However, when I hear of someone who ‘struggles’ against temptation, in this case, homosexuality, where does that struggle originate? In their own heart, they are entertaining the thought of this sin. Let’s not forget 1 Corinthians 6:11, ‘and such WERE some of you’, this is past tense, the list Paul gives in the two prior verses is what he was referencing to.
      No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it. 1 Cor. 10:13
      There should be no ongoing struggle with the same besetting sin.

      1. riley says:

        Like all sinners, we’ll have to rely on God’s power to discipline our flesh & crucify them daily. But,for you to say that there should be no ongoing struggle with the same besetting sin contradicts Romans 7:7-25. God’s grace is sufficient, but sometimes in trying to show that sufficiency, He’s chosen not to remove certain thorns in our flesh (2 Cor:12). Do you have to struggle many times against your own selfish desires? While it doesn’t control you, do you still feel it within you? Be honest. Then extend the same grace to this author the same way you extend grace to yourself. Don’t be so harsh about this woman just because her sin is not one that all of us universally experience & just because it’s less “acceptable” in the church.

      2. Brad says:


        I understand that the language of “struggle” can be confusing. And you’re right… the struggle originates in the heart. This is because, even after being justified by the blood of Jesus, we are not immediately sanctified. Sanctification is a process. In the past few years, I have grown in my struggle with homosexuality. That is to say, I have learned more about it, grown in my ability to deny my temptations and recognize how to turn to Jesus when the temptations are extremely strong. When I use the word “struggle” I don’t mean that I’m not sure whether or not acting on my temptations would be sinful; I am fully aware of what the Bible says. It just means that I am still a sinner. That I am not completely sanctified yet, and won’t be until I am in Heaven or Jesus comes again.

        To say that “there should be no ongoing struggle with the same besetting sin” implies that once a person recognizes something to be sinful, they should never ever do it again. Ever. And, of course, this is not the case. Our falling into sin is not dependent on mere intellectual agreement. It is a process of growth in the strength of Jesus Christ. Now, there definitely should be growth. A hardness of heart towards a sin indicates a problem, but struggling with sin does not mean the same thing.

        Does that make sense at all? Were we talking about the same “struggle”?

    3. Yvonne says:

      Thank you Alison, for your words of wisdom and grace. We all grow in Christ, each one in a unique way.

      Love in Him


  16. Robin says:

    I am astonished.. this gracious letter is responded to with so much…”God hates homosexuals” if “god sets you free you wouldn’t struggle” Really? God created us. He does not hate us. And a sin is a sin…power, greed, self righteousness, judgment, gossip, lust etc…we all fall short and yet God grants us forgiveness and love always.

    1. Melody says:


      I counted 26 comments that were positive and loving. A couple are harsh. A few have a reading comprehension problem and a couple are just really off the wall.
      The majority are positive and loving.

      You are seeing what you want to see. And NO ONE said that God hates anyone except you. I did ctrl F just to be sure.

  17. Ross Parker says:

    A well-meaning, well-written letter. In my mind, however, this reads like a propaganda piece..and for this reason: I don’t know any homo-sexuals who believe homosexuality, in itself, is sinful..whether in act or thought. This letter is making the great assumption that homosexuality shouldn’t be accepted by the Church because homosexuals don’t want it to be accepted by the Church. I know that lust and sex in my own, heterosexual life, are sinful (in act and thought) outside the “sacrament” (if you will) of marriage. I am very interested to meet a person like this author. I know some homosexuals and bi-sexuals, just none that believe their sexual preferences are sinful. Christianity and the Bible teach, via illustration that all creation fell into sin. Paul describes as us being “one with sin.” I don’t concern my mind or my daily life with what I call “sin management.” Pointless. I am not concerned for the eternal security of any one soul by his/her ability to count each sin and pray forgiveness for it..nor am I concerned for any one soul by his/her sexual preferences. I am not concerned about the world community, family unit, or societal structure because of the sexual preferences its people admonish. The issue of homosexuality need not be accepted or rejected by the church, but merely put to bed. It’s clear that there are homosexuals in this world; it is clear there are homosexuals in our church; it is clear that we must deal with and put to bed the presence and practice of this segment of our community because it is an issue that will hypocritize all of us and render cheap and tattered the basic principles sin and saving grace that we all should be allowed to enjoy. Yes, enjoy. As long as the Church is unforgiving and unwilling to deal with the presence of this marginalized community, she and her gospel will be resented. I don’t want that. My name is Ross, and I am a reformed Christian.

    1. Sonya says:

      I am also a Reformed Christian,

      That being said I would like to point out a couple things in the above paragraph.

      “This letter is making the great assumption that homosexuality shouldn’t be accepted by the Church because homosexuals don’t want it to be accepted by the Church.” I think what she is saying is that it shouldn’t be accepted by the Church because it is a sin, and like any other sin we cannot just allow it cause it fits our lifestyle better or its easier to not address it.

      I do not think that I understand what you mean by putting to bed this segment of our community because it will hypocritize all of us.
      I think that homosexuality needs to be rejected as a sin by a Bible-believing Church, as Christians we need to believe the whole Bible and God clearly states the homosexuality is a sin. I do not think that homosexuality will end on this earth, it will continue to be a sin that many people struggle with until Christ comes again. As Christians and the Church we need to be prepared to address homosexuality again and again, like any other sin that we struggle with.

      I do agree with your next sentence “As long as the Church is unforgiving and unwilling to deal with the presence of this marginalized community, she and her gospel will be resented.”
      The only way we as God’s people should respond is with the full gospel, that Jesus Christ has come to save us from our sins (including homosexuality) and that if we repent, believe, and follow Him, He forgives us and gives us true eternal life.

    2. Jeff Dovalovsky says:

      I know two LGBT Christians who believe homosexual acts are sin, and I think both would agree with this letter.

      This is not a letter about homosexuality being sinful, where “homosexuals don’t want it” is the primary reason to reject homosexuality. Rather, in a letter about how the Church can love and help LGBT Christians (where the author doesn’t go into reasons to reject homosexuality), standing firm is presented as one way to do so.

    3. Chris Wileman says:

      I have to wonder if this is a true letter or not.
      If it is, I have to wonder how this woman deals with the fact that, really, she is asking everyone to look on her as a sinner. Do you even KNOW what that would do to you?? Can you even imagine what that would be like every day of your life until you die… alone?? Get to know some Gay people and ask THEM what they think. How they would want to be treated in your church.

      People in most “churches” have always been kind to Gay people. I don’t think this is a problem today at all. (unless you’re in some strict Baptist church or such) In the 25 years that I’ve been a straight Evangelical woman I’ve NEVER heard Gay people being condemned. The real issue isn’t “loving the sinner and hating the sin” anymore. We’ve been pushed to move beyond that! I personally believe it’s by the Holy Spirit.

      People are SO AFRAID of “throwing out the bible” if we claim that homosexuality is not something God is worried about. That is why messages like THIS have to be sent out to the “church”.
      All this letter is going to do is make people start to think about what the church is REALLY doing to human beings and it’s going to make them feel they have to choose to not call something a sin… or be a Christian. I don’t think that is a real choice! It’s an illusion. But more young people will leave the church AND Christianity because of this attitude.
      I promise you. Yet Jesus is NOT WILLING that ANY should perish!

      Could it be that God is ACTUALLY more worried about LOVING each other than about whether or not we call something a sin??
      That He ACTUALLY cares more about us “Treating others as WE would WANT to be treated”
      That God ACTUALLY meant it when he inspired Paul to write
      “The ONLY thing that counts… is Faith expressing itself through Love.”

      I personally don’t think it’s love to grip a way of thinking with white knuckles because you THINK the bible is saying something that MAY have been cultural and talking to an entirely different issue than we have here today.
      Is it POSSIBLE church???
      Oh PLEASE think about it… and DO pray about it. I know I have.

      I realize I’m the minority here. But I think the church needs to change. Maybe it’s just me who thinks that and maybe it IS God. He DID tell an amazing story about the “sheep and the goats” that should REALLY make us think.

      I feel many of these comments and thoughts would have been held about black people not too long ago.

      Now my comment will be buried among the very loud voices who THINK this letter is so cutting edge. When it’s not. It’s the same ole same ole. I think Jesus is spewing it out of His mouth. I think He’d rather have us worship together than kick people out with our hypocritical attitudes we DON’T want to give up.

      That is the conclusion I’ve come to anyway.

  18. Ricardo Cardona says:

    2 Cor 5:17-19 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation.

    First and foremost I just want to say that you are forgiven. As the scripture says God is no longer counting your trespasses against you, and because of that you are able to live in complete freedom from sin. One thing to understand is I am not making light of sin but rather pointing to the truth that it is paid for in full and completely forgiven. Sin doesn’t cause God to bite his nail freaking out in heaven because Jesus paid for it all. Sin as well as repentance doesn’t change God, it changes you as an individual.

    You may be asking “If everyone is forgiven, does that mean everyone is saved?” There is a difference between something being available to you and you actually possessing it. You can have a bank account with a billion dollars available in your account, it doesn’t mean you can spend it all at once or even take it all out at once, but if you have a billion dollars in your hand you can do what ever you want with it without any restrictions because it is in your possession. Salvation is available to all but not all possess it.

    Romans chapter 5-8 says many times that we are dead to sin, and being dead to sin we are now alive to Christ. Easiest way to put this is dead people can’t sin. It is against their nature to sin, because if you are in Christ you bare the nature of Christ. You are co-crucified, co-buried, and co-risen. Jesus didn’t just die for you but He died as you!

    It is unfortunate that much of the church in america has taken a place it wasn’t ever intended to take in condemning individuals for their sins rather than showing love and grace. It reminds me of the story of the woman caught in adultery in which the religious folk of the day, the pharisees, wanted to stone her to death. Jesus however declared to them let the one who has no sin throw the first stone. Jesus was the only one standing there that had no sin.

    To make this clear I am not speaking in regards to clergymen and woman. Clergy are to be held to a higher standard which is consistent to Biblical principals. For more info on this read 1st and 2nd Timothy, and Galatians 5. If you are in clergy and you are reading this and have a practice of sinning I urge you to step down from your position and seek help. The book of James speaks best of this. People with an orphan mentality will always reproduce other orphans. We are called by Christ to be sons, and until we truly understand how to be a son we will never fully grasp being a father.

    1. Socrates says:

      You have a few things mixed up. The Christian is dead to sin but alive in Christ. Only the lost are dead. Also to knowingly commit sin comes from some one who is still dead. Those who are alive in Christ fight temptation to sin and avoid it at all cost. Some one with homosexual tendacies and claim to be Christian must stay away from all other homosexuals and only socialize with heteralsexual people. You do not let a drunk who is trying to stop drinking go to a bar. So as a church we must help homosexuals who want to stop stay away from temptaion. Those who will not stay away from other homosexuals must be treated as the lost and denied communion with the church till they repent. As a new creation in Christ we should hate all that God calls sin and love all that God calls righteous. Even though Christians do still sin, they do not do so willingly and repent as soon as they realize their down fall.

  19. JohnM says:

    Yes, as Ross Parker stated this reads like a propaganda piece. Like a propaganda piece not actually written by a lesbian. I was going to respond with further comments, but I really don’t see the point until somebody demonstrates the veracity of this piece.

  20. Michael says:

    If we say that we have fellowship with Him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth.

    Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.

  21. Ken Godevenos says:

    Thanks for sharing this. Just to be clear — Christians commit sin; the writer agrees that “her sins” are that just as the other sins of the rest of us are “sins” as well. Just to also be clear, the church has failed miserably in showing love to many of those on the fringe of society, including the LGBT community. But let us also be totally clear that just as I do not accept the things she mentions, I would not accept what she practices. No one in our Bible-believing churches is saying “it’s okay to commit adultery; it’s okay to steal; it’s okay to lie.” She seems to imply we do say that. We do not. Yet, she wants us to say, “it’s okay for her to practice homosexuality.” Sorry, I do not and cannot buy that. Can I love her and show her that? Absolutely — just as I would a liar, an adulterer, a thief — but I cannot condone what she practices, if she does.

    1. Andrew says:

      “Yet, she wants us to say, ‘it’s okay for her to practice homosexuality.'”

      That is the exact opposite of what she, in fact, said:

      “We do not ask for your acceptance of our sins any more than we accept yours. We simply ask for the same support, love, guidance, and most of all hope that is given to the rest of your congregation. We are your brothers and sisters in Christ. We are not what we shall be, but thank God, we are not what we were.”

      Also, the second to last paragraph is all about how it is not helpful to try and “accept” homosexual practice, because she knows what the Bible says and she knows that it is sin.

      1. Ken Godevenos says:

        Thank you Andrew for that. You’re right, this particular author did not and I commend her on that. I was thinking more about what the world would have us do with this issue. But you are correct in this case — thank God for her insight and for your willingness to catch me on this in such a loving way. Ken.

        1. Andrew says:

          I think you’re right about how most of the world (even the so-called “Christian” world) views this. I think that’s why commentators on here have a hard time believing this was actually written by a lesbian… this letter seems so far out of the norm. I find it pretty encouraging.

    2. Melody says:


      she didn’t say that she practices anything. She doesn’t want us to say that it is okay. She specifically called out the liberal churches for lying to the gay community.

      1. Ken Godevenos says:

        Melody, thanks. See my response to Andrew above.

        1. Melody says:

          Yeah I caught that after I posted. Thanks

  22. Lori says:

    One thing I always wonder about is why LGBT Christians are always supposed to deal with the issue of homosexuality first. Are LGBT Christians otherwise sinless? Because, most of my gay and lesbian friends seem to primarily struggle with the same sins I do: greed, covetousness, hard-heartedness, idolatry, anger, pride, worry, gossip, selfishness, ungratefulness. It really seems like the message LGBT people are getting from some segments of the church is “Repent from this one sin that makes you different from us, and then you’ll be fine, and we’ll all keep quiet while you continue to practice the sins the rest of us practice.”

    I just find that interesting, that homosexuality is somehow seen as *the* sin problem of gay people, rather than LGBT people being seen as complex individuals with many areas of both temptation and strength, some of which might be different from many of us but many of which are the same.

    1. mark z says:

      That’s a good point, that many in the church tolerate a plethora of sins and rarely address issues like sloth or gluttony, while this one sin is emphasized. Good question. But there may be are reason. We are fond of saying “sin is sin” and “all sins are equal” in the church, it is an idea that has been repeated on this thread more than once. But this seems to be a misunderstanding. All sins separate us from God, but Scripture makes it clear that sexual sin is different, that a man commits it against his own body, while all others are outside the body. (1 cor 6:18) and if you study across scripture you se sexual fornication in all forms is a uniquely destructive and perverse sin.

      1. Melody says:

        Visible sins are easier to stop because we are naturally accountable. Unless we are surrounded by people that care more about being liked than helping you to grow. The people that do not want to repent or grow in faith surround themselves with those kind of people on purpose.

        1. Mark Z says:

          Well, this is just conjecture here, but some sins are sins of character and some are sins of conduct. Usually, upon repentance, and as the first step of beginning the *lifelong* process of sanctification, the sins of Conduct are most immediately recognizable and shed quickest. Sins of character are unfortunately often permitted in the life of the individual and the church, they tend to be less visible. That does not make them less serious though. Esp when you consider that sins of Conduct are committed only because sins of Character are pre-existing. If the character is aligned with Christ the conduct will straighten out. Not agreeing or disagreeing with you btw, just continuing the convo. :)

  23. D says:

    I take this lady at her word. I accept her word when she says, “We enter your doors weekly seeking guidance and some glimmer of hope that we can change.” I believe she wants to change. May the Lord grant you your desire and the strength to persevere. My hope is that this lady, and others that want to change and have accepted the gospel, would be able to find a faithful fellow believer to whom she could talk. James tells us to confess our sins to one another. We need to confess them to the Lord, but it seems that there is a place to confess them to a faithful fellow believer who will keep absolute confidence; when we can confess our sins in such a way, it seems to me that a grasp that sin has on us can be broken. I think great care must be taken in choosing to whom one confesses sin; such a person needs to be totally trustworthy, and somehow, that faithfulness must be seen, evident, in their lives. May God bless you.

  24. Sara says:

    LGBT chrisitans shouldn’t think of their lifestyle as a sin, they are with people they love and if belonging to a church as a member of the LGBT community makes you feel like you are constantly living in sin I feel so strongly for you that you must continue to bear that burden your whole life.
    It’s interesting the parts of the bible that we choose to pay attention to, the parts we choose to hold ourselves accountable for, why this “sin” of homosexuality in particular? Why is this one part of the bible held in so much more regard than other parts?

    1. Sarah says:

      What exactly would you say Bible believing Christians are ignoring from the Bible? Homosexuality is not the only sin named. Please read Romans 1.

  25. A friend says:

    1. For those who have mentioned the Christian response to homosexuals who hate Christians, I challenge you to look at the history of the Church’s and Christianity’s behavior towards homosexuals– spoiler alert, it’s pretty terrible. Homosexuals in concentration camps were made to serve out their “sentence” by the American ‘liberation’ forces in WWII. LGBT folks faced and continue to face death threats, physical violence rejection, shame, and hatred in its most vile form from people who claim to be followers of Jesus. This oppression isn’t and hasn’t been limited to individuals, but the Church and government as a whole. Regardless of your opinion on homosexuality, please take a moment to reflect on why LGBT folks in the media and in positions of power profess to hating Christians. Most people don’t hold hatred in their hearts for no reason. I offer that the ‘mainstream’ LGBT response to Christianity is nothing but a response to the hatred that Christians offered toward LGBT folks first. The only response, then, to overcome the historic injustices toward LGBT folks is a lot, a LOT of love from the Christian Church. Unfortunately, I feel as though the church has invested a lot more stake in “fixing” homosexuals than loving them.

    2. I know not everyone (including the author) will agree with me when I say this, but I feel as though I need to say it anyway– as a Christian, I believe that homosexuality is not a sin. For a more thorough explanation of why I (and others!) think this is so, here’s a post that explains it more articulately than I ever could.

    3. Because of my stance on homosexuality, I want the author and anyone else reading to know that, for what it’s worth (which probably isn’t a lot, at this point), I believe with my entire being– heart, mind, body, and soul– that God loves you for exactly who you are. There is nothing– NOTHING– you can do to separate you from the love of God. I believe that there is nothing wrong with you for your capacity to love women, nothing defective because of who you can love. You are just as worthy, just as deserving of grace and compassion and love in this world as any straight person. I believe that you are capable of building a fulfilling, Godly relationship with a woman, should you chose to, that would be just as Godly as any straight relationship has the potential to be. Love is love, and any love that is Good comes from God.

    1. mark z says:

      Friend, I am afraid you are mistaken. It seems you are firmly convinced of the validity of your position, and I doubt I can change it in the space of one comment, but I urge you to reconsider the clarity with which Scripture deals with this issue. Yes there may be grey area of conviction and morality, but there are also, and mostly, absolutes.

      I have a friend who is a lesbian and walked away from her Christian faith altogether. Why? Because she was reading her bible and realized that it absolutely does not support homosexuality. She went so far as to say that Christians and churches who try to uphold the bible as permitting homosexuality are misguided and wrong. She is not blind. She knew she Hasbro make a choice between what God clearly teaches and her own desires, so she rejected Christ. This does not mean I have rejected her, we communicate, and I pray she comes to repentance one day. But the truth cannot be bent, it can only be broken.

    2. Melody says:

      Mankind has been brutal towards everyone. Everyone has a story. It doesn’t give a pass on sin. Mankind crucified an innocent PERFECT man. That is the only lifestyle that is acceptable to God.

    3. Clark says:

      I think I see your problem:
      You are just as worthy, just as deserving of grace and compassion and love in this world as any straight person.

      Yeah, that’s just not biblical. No one deserves grace, no one is worthy. But then you don’t really base your beliefs on the bible. So you may reject this too. But the Bible clearly teaches that we all have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory (including his goodness).
      And there is none righteous and there is none who seeks after God.
      If anyone was worthy, grace would be unnecessary.

  26. Annie says:

    We must stand up for our brothers and sisters in Christ. It is first our duty to love God, and second our duty to love others. We must love first with patience, with kindness, keeping no record of wrongs as Paul defines agape. We must not judge the eternal state of one’s soul, whether or not Christ has saved them, but allow God to work in the lives of those around us, and allow God to judge. “In the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” I know my own sin, and therefore know I cannot afford to be anything other than completely merciful with anyone else, or I will be judged according to my lack of mercy. I hope to be judged with the maximum mercy available in the universe. I presume my sin has died with Christ, and that the sin of others has as well, even though I know mine is still present now, it is dead with Christ’s death. Do I dilute the gospel by accepting the sin of my brothers and sisters has died with Christ, and accepting the promise of their resurrection with Christ while insisting judgement is God’s alone? Do I dilute the gospel by adhering earnestly (though falteringly) to the greatest commandments? Do I dilute the gospel by insisting we are saved by grace alone?

    To the writer of this article, may the love of God be shown to you through the church, the body of Christ. And may he give you the strength to live according to your convictions. I pray I will never pressure you, or anyone, to act in anyway against your own conscience. The Gay Christian Network is a positive place where you can find support among Christians. They provide support and fellowship for those who believe God does not condone homosexual relationships and support celibacy for that reason. You will not be condemned by Christians there for being gay, nor will you be condemned by its more liberal members for holding to your moral beliefs about homosexuality.

  27. Justin Taylor says:

    Hunter Baker knows the author of this post and assures me that it is 100% authentic.

    1. Hodge says:

      I guess my only question would be as to why she identifies herself as a lesbian. Or is that an identification given to her by the author? If I was writing an open letter to churches concerning their need to give hope to people who struggle with a particular temptation, I wouldn’t necessarily identify myself as that sin.

      In other words, shouldn’t she identify herself as a Christian who struggles with a particular temptation and not as one has her identity in that sin?

      Maybe it’s just semantics, but I think that’s why so many have seen it as a potential piece of propaganda.

  28. KWest says:

    Do some churches emphasize the sin of homosexuality? Yes. But I do not accept the implication that by-and-large, evangelicals are victimizing homosexuals. That is propaganda. The majority evangelical community understands we are all sinners. But, what if a culture was created that believed homosexuals were the “victims” of “self-righteous” Christians? How would that affect the church and it’s ability to reach people for Christ? …Kirk and Madsen, The Overhauling of Straight America, 6-Point Plan: “Step 2: Portray gays as victims, not as aggressive challengers… Step 5: Make the victimizers look bad”

    1. Annie says:

      I have heard many secularists make the same ‘playing victim propaganda’ allegations about the church, so it is interesting to hear the same idea applied in the opposite direction.

      I think, though, it is important to remember the increased rates of suicides and attempted suicides among LGBT youth. It would be difficult to argue that that data is merely correlative, and we all must do what we can to decrease the suffering those who are suicidal endure, no matter why they feel that way. It isn’t just about whether or not homosexuality is a sin, but whether we should fight to give hope to those who feel so rejected (by their families, their community, their church, God, etc.) that they do not want to live.

  29. Teresa says:

    Lyn has it wrong. Many struggle with ongoing temptation of the same type. Satan and his demons study us from birth. They know us well. They only use our individual weaknesses against us. It would do no good to do otherwise.

    Paul spoken of a thorn in his side, an ongoing problem he struggled with. To indicate that some problems simply go away because we reject Satan once is ridiculous. Even when Satan left from tempting Jesus (yes..Jesus felt tempted), he only separated until “a more convenient time.

    1. lyn says:

      Where does sin originate Teresa? Go to James 1:13,14. Now, if someone continues to struggle, why is that? Because they entertain the thought of it in their mind. If I have it wrong, then Christ is a liar when He stated this from John 8:36 “So if the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed”

      We also find this from 1 Corinthians 10:13, ‘No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.’ Clearly, if you are struggling with some lingering sin, God has made it clear, He will provide a way out. The struggle against the same repeated temptation should not be ongoing, according to the word of God.

      1. kristina says:

        Do you you ever commit the same sin more than once, Lyn? If you do not, great for you. If you do, however, than your argument is worthless.

        1. lyn says:

          I never stated I am without sin, to say one struggles with homosexuality and that they are a Christian goes against what the Bible teaches, as I’ve already pointed out using God’s word by showing where sin is birthed from as well as what Christ Himself states concerning sin and its bondage. I can say, by God’s grace, I no longer struggle with homosexuality, nor do I struggle with addictions. It is the regenerating power of God that has freed me. Do you understand two essential doctrines found in the Bible, the doctrine of regeneration and the doctrine of repentance? Do you understand sin, where it comes from, how it enslaves?
          True believers live a life of repentance. That means we sin, sometimes we fall into grievous sin. But, God will not leave us in that sin, it no longer has bondage over us.

          Now, show me, from Scripture, where anything I’ve stated is false.

          1. Andrew says:

            Lyn– you think one cannot struggle with sin and be a Christian?

            We all stumble in many ways. James 3:2

            Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. James 5:16

            If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word has no place in our lives. 1 John 1:8-10

            I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do–this I keep on doing. Romans 7:15-19

          2. Andrew says:

            “to say one struggles with homosexuality and that they are a Christian goes against what the Bible teaches”

            So, can I not struggle with anger, or lust, or whatever either? Does that also mean that I am not a Christian?

            1. lyn says:

              Can you continue struggling with the same sin, like homosexuality? If Christ has freed a sinner from that bondage, how can you possibly claim to still continue struggling with it? This sin is birthed out of a desire for what’s forbidden, the only way I know I could struggle with this temptation is if I filled my mind with lustful and perverse thoughts of women.

              YES, we wrestle daily with sin [in general], yes, we fail. I am NOT implying Christians are sinless, I am asking how a lesbian can continue struggling with that same temptation repeatedly. The only way I see it being possible is if she continues to feed her mind on lustful thoughts. As a former lesbian, I do not struggle with this sin any longer, Christ freed me. Yes I do still sin, and I walk daily in repentance. Yes, I battle against my flesh, but my battle isn’t one that leaves me defeated. I have victory over sin through Jesus Christ, sin no longer enslaves me or has dominion over me. I no longer am in bondage to alcohol and cigarettes. I no longer struggle with those sins, why? Because the Son has set me free.
              David had an affair with Bathseba, and God dealt with him rightly. However, did David continue to wrestle with adultery? Was that an ongoing struggle for him? The Bible is very clear, sexual sin must be dealt with, especially within the church. The battle against sin is a daily battle, requiring continual guidance, strength, and counsel from the Lord. We sin, we confess, He forgives. BUT, Habitual sin should not be an issue, as 1 John 3 teaches.

              It would appear many go to great lengths to justify sin rather than forsake it. That’s why the church is so ineffective. When Christ said “If your eye causes you to stumble, pluck it out and throw it from you. It is better for you to enter life with one eye, than to have two eyes and be cast into the fiery hell.”- He was teaching us to deal radically with sin. Unfortunately, this teaching is absent from most churches.
              You asked me if you struggle with anger and lust does that mean you aren’t a Christian? I ask you, is it habitual? What does God’s word say concerning anger? ‘Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.’ Eph. 4:31
              What about lust you ask? ‘Flee immorality. Every other sin that a man commits is outside the body, but the immoral man sins against his own body.’ 1 Cor. 6:18
              ‘Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body so that you obey its lusts, and do not go on presenting the members of your body to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; but present yourselves to God as those alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness to God. For sin shall not be master over you, for you are not under law but under grace.’ Romans 6:12-14
              ‘But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts.’ Romans 13:14

            2. lyn says:

              The problem I have with this post is that she defines herself as a ‘lesbian’. That flies against scripture, 1 Corinthians 6:11, ‘Such WERE some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.’

              She would have done well to state ‘former lesbian’, if indeed that’s what she is. She also implies the church believes ‘we do not exist within your walls, your schools and neighborhoods’. What is she referencing to? Unrepentant homosexuals or born from above followers of Christ? It’s hard to say…

          3. Yvonne says:

            Dear Lyn, my sister in Christ. Grace and peace to you: from one sinner to another, saved by the grace of God, through the greatest sacrifice of all by our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ, who took it upon himself to die for me, and you, and the author of the original letter in this column. It was his suffering love that took away the penalty for All Sin, for All, and for ALL time! You have been greatly blessed by overcoming the sin of homosexuality, and this I am sure you would agree is due to the wonderful grace that has been given and received by you. However, the author of the original letter on this site, regarding her own struggles with this particular sin, is a sister in Christ who is crying out to the Body of Christ for their love and support. You and I are part of that Body, just as she is, and we are bound by duty and love to support one another in our weaknesses. Our mutual love for the Lord Jesus as the Supreme Head of this Body demands it must be so. However, I find your posts make it clear that you find this particular sister unworthy, until she can claim she is completely free from her particular thorn in the flesh: in plainer language, she needs to become as you are before you can deem her worthy to be called a True Believer. How sad that you cannot forward some of that God grace which you have been given. Your knowledge of scripture is impressive. However, I feel that some of your posts lack a sense of love especially towards this particular individual. Therefore,…quoting Corinthians 13: ” If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong, a clanging cymbal.And if I have the gift of prophecy, and can fathom all mysteries and knowledge, and if I have the faith that can move a mountain, but have not love, I am nothing”.
            So Lyn, you are obviously an overcomer, but your posts convey to me at least, a lot of clanging and a fair amount of spouting of scripture to back up your interpretation of it. Our sin of self-righteousness; a sin of pride,can become quite evident. However, maybe it is just me……I certainly have much pride to overcome. May we all be helped by the Holy Spirit.
            Thankfully, it is the Lord who knows all those that belong to him, and not us.
            Love to All in Him.

    2. lyn says:

      Rejecting Satan is not where sin originates, it comes from our own heart. The Lord taught this in Matthew 15:19,””For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, slanders.” Heart is translated from the Greek word ‘kardia’ and is defined by Thayer’s Greek Definitions as ‘ the soul or mind, as it is the fountain and seat of the thoughts, passions, desires, appetites, affections, purposes, endeavours’ Notice what comes out of our minds…evil thoughts, murder, adulteries, fornications – which is porneia in the Greek- and means ‘adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals etc.’ Sin is birthed within our own hearts, including homosexuality/lesbianism. We cannot blame Satan for this, according to the word of the Lord.

      1. confused Christian says:

        Lyn has asked some very fundamental questions that should be addressed. Where does sin come from? She says from our desires citing James, but does sin not also stem from our nature as fallen beings? Do we have a say in the sinful things we do (as they arise from the depths of our hearts desires) or are they out of our control due to our sinful nature.I know once we are saved, Christ gives us a new natrue, but the process of sanctification is often a slow one and this new nature may not completely manifest itself in our lifetimes even if we live very long lives. And so we continue to do things we dont want to do. Our DESIRE is willing but we remain weak. Lyn simply cannot imagine how homosexual urges can be involuntary since the author is saved.

        1. Brad says:

          Thank you confused Christian. This is exactly what I’ve been thinking. Though we are saved, we still have a sinful nature, and that won’t change until we are in Heaven or Jesus comes again. And totally agree about the sanctification bit… I could say more, but I think you hit on it perfectly.

        2. Yvonne says:

          Thank you confused Christian. What you have said is Romans 7 and 8 in a nutshell! I feel sorry for Lyn and others like her whose hearts may have been a little hardened or narrowed, along with their obvious well-meaning narrow walk.

          As to the question “where does Sin come from”? I have been taught and believe that God created the ‘propensity’ for Sin, but Satan is the original perpetrator of Sin and will continue throughout time to abuse the hearts and minds of mankind in his never-ending quest to promote all that is against God: Sin. Satan has lost the big battle, but we all have to deal with him on a day to day basis. His main goal is to stop the worshipping of God, so to all of us who worship our God and Father,and the Lord Jesus Christ, by the Holy Spirit, I have a feeling he has a particular eye on us. Thanks be to our God, that the victory is His. The battle over sin and death is already won, a victory won through the Spirit of holiness when Jesus was appointed the Son of God in power, by his resurrection from the dead.

          Amen and Hallelujah!

  30. John K says:

    1. Gay slurs are wrong to say. “f–” “d—” “q—-” (both with q), etc. are wrong for Christians to say. It’s also wrong to make jokes that way. I did when I was younger and I was wrong. I am sorry. It’s too serious an issue to make jokes about.
    2. I make a distinction between practicing gays and lesbians, and non-practicing gays and lesbians. I will call practicing ones “non-celibate lgbt’s” or whichever letter.
    3. I would love to have non-celibate glbt people come to my church. As seekers. Baptism and membership would have to wait until there is repentance.
    4. I Corinthians 6 is clear about non-celibate lgbt not entering the kingdom of God. I interpret this this way (and this is not merely my opinion but I believe this is what the Bible is teaching). If you are a non-celibate glbt, and you call yourself a Christian, but you do not repent (believing its not a sin is a sign of not being repentant) and refuse to repent in this lifetime of this, no matter how good a Christian you are or think you are otherwise, you fall into the category of “these people honor me with their lips, but their hearts are far away from me but in vain do they worship me teaching as doctrines the precepts of men”. And you won’t be in heaven, I’m sorry to say.
    5. If it is known that a non-celibate glbt is in the church, the Matthew 18 church discipline steps should be followed. If there is no repentance, the person should be “delivered to Satan” (I Cor. 5) so that hopefully outside the church they will repent and come back.
    6. #5 should be applied to all heterosexual sins such has promiscuity, monogamy outside of marriage, soliciting prostitues, adultery, and all other types of sexual immorality condemned in I Cor. 6. GLBT sins are far from the only sexual sins that can disqualify a Christian confession. Also, improper divorce and remarriage falls under adultery.
    7. Repentance does not necessarily mean that a non-celibate gay becomes completely celibate on a dime. There may be mistakes, slip ups, and false starts. But it starts with acknowledging that homosexuality is a serious sin. Then it requires an attempt to change to honor God. Confession to a pastor or elder is part of the process. Movement towards celibacy can be a sign of true repentance.
    8. I’m sorry for the “lesser” and “greater” sins that Christians have done against glbt people. Not everyone who has claimed to act in the name of God is really a Christian, and sometimes true Christians have made bad mistakes. Church discipline should also be applied to people who, outside of proclaiming God’s word on these issue, continually make life miserable for homosexuals.
    9. Just to clarify, per the Bible, marriage is not a Biblically legit way for people to be non-celibate glbt. Neither is swinging, “open” marriages, etc.

  31. Sarah says:

    I didn’t meet the man who became my husband until I was 21, and he was my first boyfriend, my first love, my first kiss, and my first lover – as well as being the one who demonstrated the love of Christ to me in such a way that it finally clicked in my head and my heart and my soul, and I became a Christian.
    He was not the first person I had been attracted to, but he was the first (and only) man I’ve ever been attracted to. I chose to avoid female companionship, even at a young age, because I knew where my weakness lay and I didn’t want to give it even a toe-hold. But he is the only person who knows that. I was raised in church, by a Christian family who would have been absolutely horrified had they known that my secret struggle was same-sex attraction. The knowledge of their condemnation is what kept me from acting on my nature then, but it is Christ in me who keeps me from acting on it now.
    I do not want validation, or to have that aspect of my struggle against the flesh downplayed in any way. The act would be sin, and the temptation is still strong. But I hold that it is neither better nor worse for a man to glance lustfully at a woman than it is for me to do the same – yet he is welcomed into a men’s group where he will be commiserated with and prayed for, whereas I dare not speak, which makes my struggle all the harder by adding a lack of accountability to it. It is the gauging of sins that I (and I believe the writer of this letter) protest – the tendency to choose one or two and make them out to be somehow worse than the rest, while sliding the others down the scale until they become almost no longer a sin.
    That is no longer the battle I fight most (thank God!) – but there are others, too, more “normal.” Pride. Doubt. Impatience (with others, and with God’s timing). Common things. Things that I can admit to and request prayer for among those who are my brothers and sisters.
    Our common sin, as children of Adam, is that we think that we don’t need God, or that we are ourselves gods. That is what we must repent of, and that is what we must be redeemed from. Beyond that, each of us has our own personal list of struggles, as individual as the individual to whom it belongs. All that is good in us is of God; all that is evil, of ourselves. And no matter what is on our list, we need to strive to replace it all with Light and Love.
    I applaud your courage, sister in Christ, for writing this letter – and I pray both for your continued boldness and that I would inspired enough by your example to follow it.

    1. Chris says:

      This is a good post. Thanks for sharing it, Sarah. Keep living by faith.

    2. ryu says:


      here is a woman living out scripture more than just quoting it.
      You denied the flesh of your self and bear the cross of taking up the task to be one wife to one man. This is noble and honorable before the LORD.
      You have been wise as well, because you fear the LORD since a young age with His Word in your heart, and flee from the desires of your youth.
      1Cor 7:14 is proven true by your case. Your husband’s undivided dedication is your crown of life, and this marriage must a be a sanctifying gift from God.

      so madam, i say blessings to you

      as for the comment to “give into temptations”. I don’t know where you’re coming from but you need to figure out where you’re going. Because we all know who else talks like that in the Bible

      .hello from Toronto

    3. Melody says:

      Thanks for sharing, Sarah.

  32. Bob Devine says:

    I think there is a direct link between sins of bondage and confessing that sin to a trusted believer. There seems to be some dispensation of grace in that step of faith that brings something towards healing that can not be gained if we decide to keep it secret. Bringing it to the light and becoming accountable to another Christ purchased soul is probably needed more than we care to admit.

  33. Paul says:

    If you love GOD, you will keep his commandments.
    Do you believe Romans 1:26 – 28 is applicable to you?
    Now that you have been made aware of this scripture, and since you said that you seek to keep GOD’S commandments. You will be obedient to it and GOD will be well pleased with you, because you love HIS WAYS rather than your own.

  34. Oogsterday says:

    Does having homosexual desires make you a homosexual? I would dare to say no. Desires, at their most basic form are not sin, and they do not make us who we are. There is the desire to lust, but unless I DO lust I am not an adulterer. There is the desire to hate, but unless I do hate I am not a murderer. There is the desire to lie, but unless I do lie I am not a liar.

    Though I see this woman’s point, I think she should understand that she is not what her desires make her out to be. Does that mean that she won’t falter and sin? No, but just because there is a desire for something sinful within her, that doesn’t make her a sinner. I could call myself a murderer for hating people sometimes, but I’d rather see myself in the light of the righteousness Jesus bestowed on me. If she sees her sin and has repented of it (as it appears is the situation here), then she no longer needs to place herself in a category of people that she is calling sinful. Why not strive for the perfection she alludes to and ignore what others might call her in light of past sins or personal desires?

  35. Noah says:

    Homosexuality is a sin. No matter what. If our main goal in life is to please God no matter what, we are to obey to our fullest ability. Living as a homosexual is not our fullest ability. Homosexuality is a sin no matter what and while it is NOT greater than any other sin, it is still a sin they need to repent of. We are told to live a pure sexual life, homosexuality is not living a pure sexual life. Simple as that. In the end, homosexuality is always wrong but all Christians should be allowed to attend church, but the ones struggling with homosexuality need some help on becoming sexually pure again.

  36. PhillyInDC says:

    Very interesting conversations going on here. I have something to share…

    Is being attracted or “love” a member of the same sex a sin? I don’t think so. Is have pre-marital relations with ANYONE of the same or opposite sex a sin? Absolutely.

    If we point to the Bible to say that the reason why same sex marriage is wrong is because the primary reason for marriage is procreation. Using that reasoning, is it then a sin to marry someone who is unable to have children?

    Not a sermon, just a though :)

    1. AStev says:

      A little quibble: The idea that “the primary reason for marriage is procreation” is flat-out wrong. You will find this nowhere in Scripture, but rather, it originates somewhere in the halls of Roman Catholic speculation. So what about couples that are infertile?

      In contrast to Catholic teaching, what the Bible says is that the primary reason for marriage is to serve as a symbol for the relationship between Christ and his people. Note that God didn’t pattern the relationship between Christ and the church after seeing what marriage looked like. Just the opposite: Before the first marriage ever existed, the institution was ordained to reflect the relationship between Christ and the church.

      Under the Catholic “procreation” criteria, couples who are infertile are failures when it comes to the ultimate purpose of marriage. Under the biblical criteria, infertile couples can still exercise their ultimate purpose: to glorify God in their love and faithfulness and selflessness toward one another.

  37. R. Jones says:

    There’s no way to read all the comments but two caught my eye…obviously the first one. Sir I’m not sure if you got her point. She doesn’t seem to be validating homosexuality but pleading for support like any other struggle with sin. And Allison I’m grateful that you and probably others expounded more on that thought. May The Lord open our eyes and gives us grace and wisdom as to how to minister those seeking a relationship with God or who our brothers and sisters in The Lord with the struggle of homosexuality.

  38. Rich says:

    Dear Sister.
    I hear you and have compassion for you. I too am a Christian and I repented of my sin. I held on to none of it, including my desire to revile God by doing with my body what I believe I could. If I am Christ’s then my body is not my own. Period – don’t twist the truth. Jhn 10:27 My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. Galations teaches all Christian’s that Jesus + Anything = Nothing Jesus + Nothing = Everything! Please consider your words and what you are claiming. Being an openly practicing Gay is not Walking in the Spirit with Jesus Christ, anymore that lust, pride or whatever you try to rationalize. Take the (speck) out of your own eye first! Be called to come out from amoung them (the world). I love you in Christ and know that God created you to worship him. So be Holy and do not defile yourself with others or alone. The words Jesus said most often while he walked the earth, “REPENT- for the Kingdom of Heaven is at hand”. I will and am now praying that you will find the peace that only God can supply. Remember, Jesus + nothing = everything! Do not hold on to any sin. Your identity is in Christ not your gender preference. Grace peace and love.

  39. James says:

    Factually she is incorrect. In reality, homosexuality only makes up less than 1% of the U.S. population. Sure that can be adjusted for those who don’t openly identify as gay or lesbian but still, it is really not that much. It is media that gives the impression that there are many more who are openly gay and lesbian.

    All that being said, the author has a great point and I applaud her for writing this much needed letter.

    1. hespenshied says:

      James, I think part of the point here is that the letter writer represents a (supposed) large group of folks who suffer in silence, and who do not (at least yet) raise their hands to be counted as gay.

      Whereas the professing gay population is <1% as you stated, I would think it would be pretty difficult to quantify those who are predisposed to this temptation – much like it would be difficult to quantify those who are predisposed to alcoholism, but who are not actually alcoholics.

    2. AStev says:

      1% of the population is still an enormous number. Let’s make a conservative estimate and say that only 0.125% of southern baptists struggle with homosexuality and recognize it as temptation towards sinful behavior. That’s still TWENTY THOUSAND of our beloved brothers and sisters in Christ struggling to mortify sin in their lives, and we have an obligation to help them in their struggle as they help us in ours.

      “If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together.” – 1 Cor. 12:26

  40. Irene says:

    Please check out Christopher Yuan’s Facebook page. He was a homosexual until he became a Christian. He gives talks all over concerning this issue.

  41. I think many people are having a tough time trying to understand what she’s saying because it’s outside of their perception of what’s normal.

    1) Most church members have simply been sociologically bludgeoned by the anti-Christian LGBT+++ agenda and are tired of being told that we’re homophobic, intolerant, bigoted, unloving, hypocrites who should accept the homosexual lifestyle as the new norm. And now we have a sister in Christ who agrees with us that it’s a sin, but we’re still wrong somehow. We can’t win for losing.

    2) She’s absolutely right, but for the right reason. We have plenty of “acceptable” sins that we tolerate in the Church week in and week out and we need to repent of them. We accept each other when we commit the acceptable sins, but won’t accept brothers and sisters in Christ who struggle with unacceptable sins. For what it’s worth, we pretty much suck at helping anyone in their struggle with sin because we think we’re above it.

    3) If we can get past my #2 just above, we need brothers and sisters like her to help us in our struggle against the anti-Christian LGBT+++ social agenda. She can provide insight that we don’t have and issue proclamations that we can’t make.

  42. Wayne says:

    This is an interesting article. I agree that “laughter, hatred, or jokes” is not fitting. I also agree that the grace of God should also be extended to homosexuals. Homosexuality is not the unpardonable sin. However, they cannot understand grace or their need for grace if they do not understand the condemnation of God. I also agree it is a disgrace for a pastor or church to neglect preaching against other common sins in our society.
    My major contention with this article is that she presents herself as a practicing lesbian and a Christian. 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 and 1 John 3:6-9 make it clear that such cannot be the true. Paul says that such shall not inherit the kingdom of God. John teaches that a person living a habitual lifestyle of sin is not a child of God. So, according to the word of God, a person living in homosexuality or fornication is not a Christian and never has been. The Bible also makes it very clear that both can be saved. If they will repent and accept Jesus as Lord of their life, He will forgive them and free them. After condemning practicing homosexuals, fornicators, idolaters and other sinners Paul says, “And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.” So, there it is. They are condemned but they can be forgiven and when they are they will also be changed.

    1. AStev says:

      I don’t think she presents herself as a practicing lesbian, any more than any of us are “practicing” sinners. When she says, “Like you, we often fail” and “we recognize our sin. Does the church as a whole see theirs?” She is saying that homosexual behavior is wrong, and asks that faithful, biblical churches remember to show love towards even the most stigmatized of sinners, and asks that unfaithful churches repent from worldly compromise, which offers no hope.

      1. Pastor says:

        That’s what I was wondering AStev. I posted below about it. It’s hard to tell from the article. :)

      2. Wayne says:

        The question is if she has that as a temptation or if it is her lifestyle. Note that I said practicing homosexual. I too struggle with temptation and do give into the temptation and sin. However, a Christian will not habitually live in that sin. There are men and women in our churches that live together without being married. They claim to be Christians and some of them will admit it is wrong. But they are not repenting of it. They are giving evidence that they are not true children of God by their habitual lifestyle of sin. The same is true of a practicing homosexual. If she is not practicing the sin, she should not identify herself as a lesbian, but someone was and still struggles with that temptation. She was not created that way, for the Bible says it is unnatural (i.e., against creation, Rom 1:26-27). A liar is a person that tells lies. A person tempted to tell lies, but does not is not a lair. Homosexual implies a person practicing homosexuality. I would agree that it is possible for a Christian to be tempted by homosexuality. I would even agree it is possible for a Christian to give in and commit act of sin. It is impossible, however, for a Christian to habitual practice that sin (or lying, fornication, etc.).
        If she is just struggling with the temptation, then she needs to be shown from the Word of God the difference between who she is, what she did, and what she is tempted by. She is a child of God who was a practicing lesbian and is tempted by it. As long as she sees herself as a lesbian, she cannot see the hope of change. It is easier to see hope of change when you realize it is what you do not who you are.

        1. Pastor says:


  43. AStev says:

    “We are your brothers and sisters in Christ. We are not what we shall be, but thank God, we are not what we were. Let us work together to see that we all arrive safely home.”

  44. Pastor says:

    I think she is totally right about the condemnation in certain churches and individuals. What I am not sure about is if she and other homosexuals are in church with a repentant heart, turning from their wicked ways, just like the sincere Christians in church are doing. Or is she continuing to sin, blatantly, without a heart of repentance. I’m not saying she should leave and that it changes how we treat them, I’m saying that maybe she shouldn’t label herself a homosexual Christian, because a Christian has a repentant heart. Again, I’m not sure where she is coming from. And if she and I are a repentant sinner, maybe we call ourselves just that, instead of placing labels of specific sins. Sin is a sin. I’m not a lying sinner because I commit many sins. I am just a sinner. Maybe it would be best to lose all the labels, let the homosexuals know they do not have to label themselves homosexual Christians, I am not a lying Christian. I am a Christian, repentant of my many sins, imperfectly pursuing the perfect Savior who purifies me. (1 John 1:5-10; 5:18) Does this make sense? I am trying to show grace and truth in this post, trying to help us see the important of loving people because we lose the labels and pointing them to the Savior and in response we hope they repent.

    1. AStev says:

      I get what you’re saying. Though I am a believer who often caves into to pride, lust, unjust anger, disrespect toward govering authorities, selfishness, doubt, anxiety, etc – those things are not my identity any longer. My old body of death is dead and buried and I have been raised as a new creation – that is my identity. I have been saved from the penalty of sin, am being saved from the power of sin, and anticipate that glorious day when we will all be saved from the presence of sin altogether!

  45. Kyle says:

    I too agree that this is propaganda. This forum is hearing what it wants to hear: a lesbian admitting that her homosexuality is sinful and requesting the church’s love, guidance, and help during her time of struggle.

    This issue will not ever go away until Christians see homosexual people first as people before they see them as homosexual. Has anyone in here seen the statistics of suicides for homosexual teenagers?

    This issue is not black and white – and anyone who thinks otherwise (while pointing to the bible) might out to consider the church’s former stance on slavery (and even some current stances on women).

    Although no one in here will agree with anything I have said, I would like to challenge us all to consider how the church deals with sin. Apparently, we deal with sin best when it is visible. For example, let’s take sexual sin – we deal best with someone’s sexual sin when we see her/him sitting with a same-sex partner in church. But perhaps there are 10 other ‘fornicators’ sitting in the same sanctuary who will never receive the judgment of the church! So until we are willing to get snoopy into everyone’s sex life to insure ‘biblical purity’ then perhaps we ought to lower our voices and judgment on the LGBTQ community. It is because of these raised voices and condemnation that the suicide rate in homosexual teenagers is so high.

    The common phrase within Christianity is to “hate the sin, not the sinner.” But I argue that the church’s hatred of homosexuality cannot be contained to the ‘sin.’ If I were homosexual, I would be absolutely terrified of the church, and would probably live my life in fear and melancholy alone, afraid to let anyone in on my feelings, confusions, wounds… my life in general.

    Because of the church’s hateful reaction to homosexuality (and therefore homosexual people), as a pastor, I stand by homosexual people. In Matthew chapter 5, Jesus preaches to a crowd and teaches his disciples “You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden.” Jesus ordains these people as the light of the world – as they are, sinners, broken, flawed, and yet loved by their God. Jesus doesn’t tell them first to make sure to rid themselves of any homosexuality before you can be a city on a hill. And neither should we.

    1. Kaerina says:

      Thank you, Kyle. It is sad that she thinks she is “bad.” This article attempts to seem open, but actually for that reason, is all the more condemning. She is lovely as she is. That is the message she needs to hear: you are wonderful as you are. It is saddening that she has internalized misplaced condemnation.

    2. Coda says:

      I just wanted to address this horrible misunderstanding. You said, “This issue is not black and white – and anyone who thinks otherwise (while pointing to the bible) might out to consider the church’s former stance on slavery (and even some current stances on women).”

      The part I want to address is on Slavery. Slavery in the Bible is NOT the same as the enslaved African-Americans. Slaves in the Bible could earn a wage, often times selling themselves into slavery because their owners were required to feed, clothe, give shelter, and educate them. Nowhere were people kidnapped from their homes, sold and sent into a new land to do manual labor. I could go on, but really you should just listen to Matt Chandler’s sermon Slavery and the Skeptic. You can look it up online and listen for free.

  46. Marge Sweigart says:

    This is one of the most confusing things I’ve read in a long time and I have a hard time believing that it is actually written by a lesbian sister in Christ. Just my gut feeling. I’m wondering, is this really a cloaked jab at Rob Bell?

    1. Cedric says:

      I agree with you Marge. Is this even real? If it is, I think this is one confused person. Is she asking that the church offer programs to help change her? Or is she asking the church accept her as she is? It seems rather confusing, and unfortunately not that helpful.

      Sigh… and the endless debates continue.

  47. K Douglass says:

    Oh sister how good it is to hear someone preach the truth from the inside! You give me hope and courage. You are so right that the church is afraid of not being politically correct and offending people. It is so hard to admit sin to any group of people, let alone your church family. The gospel should not be sugar coated. Sin should not be hidden or glossed over or given ranks on a scale. Sin should be let into the light so that people (including me) can have the opportunity to repent and grow in the faith. I’m very proud of you for standing up and speaking out on behalf of people like us who love God desperately and still struggle with our sexuality. But you are right. We have to constantly choose our love of God over our love of self and sin.

  48. bossmanham says:

    “Do you see the sin of pride, that you are better than or more acceptable to Jesus than we are?”

    Well this is awful judgmental of her. Who is she to say that others have a haughty attitude regarding their status as compared to a homosexual’s?

    I think we’re all sinners saved by grace. I’m a man, and a serial luster. I pray every day for forgiveness for and deliverance from that sin. When the pastor preaches about lust, it makes me uncomfortable too. But I don’t go around, like homosexuals tend to do, and lecture others on talking about this sin. I WANT this sin spoken about, because I need to be reminded of it.

  49. Insightful, well-written, and necessary essay. As a companion to this topic I recommend a book by Rosaria Butterfield, The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert. I will need to reread this post to absorb all that was stated and implied. One thing I do know is that the Church must have more compassion and understanding, as did our Savior, and as was pointed out-without compromising the truth of God’s Word. Why do we have such a hard time with loving the sinner, but hating the sin?

  50. Teri says:

    Educate yourself and read: The Children Are Free!

  51. Ray Slocum says:

    First of all, my Bible states this is sin ,and to pray the sin out of your life as the same with all of us who sin , that is to be forgiven by God and expect to go to Heaven . As for this letter it is somewhat confusing, that the writer is looking for exclusion to go on as a God fearing person and continue in the habits of being a lesbian or homosexual ,and yet still have requested God into his/her life. That be the case , then that sin the same as any other sin in any of our lives ,is not gone or been forgiven. In other words one cannot have it both ways when confessing sin to God, and continue in it! Quite simple , Repent the sin and forget as well as clean up the sin , anybody , including me!!!! As for this sin to be accepted in the Spirit filled born again Christian church ,if it happens, then it is time to pack it in, leave that church!!!! RS

    1. Clark says:

      Yeah, Ray, I don’t think she said she was continuing in the sin. She said she was a lesbian but that might only mean she still is attracted by other females, not that she is indulging in the lifestyle or the behaviour.

  52. Lori says:

    In careful reading of the post, the author states there are Christian homosexuals everywhere, and many are people you like and associate with (they are your teachers, accountants, neighbors, etc), point being they are not monsters, they are everyday people. She seems to be saying that within the church, homosexuality is treated worse than other sins, by the very people who themselves are sinning in more socially acceptable, but equally greivous ways — lying, adultary, etc. The writer wants not special status within the church, but for us to embrace and help her, and others like her who know they are sinning when they give in to their wrong desires, with the same love and acceptance as we do all sinners, and with the humility that comes knowing we ourselves often fail and come short of the glory of God. In other words, the Golden Rule: Do unto others as we would have them do to you.

    As the Church, we need to strive to embrace and show compassion to those who are repentant, whether they are drug addicts, homosexuals, or adulterers. Not one of us is perfect. However, we must draw the line at having a caveleir attitude towards sin, and in a misquided effort at inclusion, support a gay lifestyle as just another choice, as the secular world believes.

    Personal note: A couple of weeks ago, my teenaged son brought me a multi-page handwritten letter that told me he was gay, and had been all his life. He sat nervously watching my face as I read his letter. At the end, I looked him right in the eye, and said, “Well, Duh!” We both laughed, and I gave him a huge hug. I knew from raising this child, from interests, actions, to mannerisms, he may very well be gay. I have raised all of my children in the light and truth of Jesus Christ, prayed and read scripture daily with them. I know each of them has a battlefield, and their temptations will be different, but equally challenging. My son believes homosexual behavior is forbidden by scripture, and prays he will remain celibate and forgo temptation all of his life. I told him 1) Your sexuality is NOT the most important thing about you. It is NOT “who you are”, as some people elevate sex and sexual proclivity, 2) You CAN be a Christian, despite your temptation to sin, 3) Everyone has their battlefield. Some men are tempted to have affairs and lust after every women they see, for example. Being tempted is not a pass to commit sin, and 4) Making prayer, scripture reading, Christian relationships part of your daily walk can help make a positive difference in this battle. and here I would add a 5th, and most important truth….God loves you, and wants to use you for HIS glory. Seek Him first, and he will give you strength and power to live a life worthy of His call.

    1. Clark says:

      Excellent, thank you for this.

    2. Michael A. says:

      Interesting point Lori. It struck me reading all the posts why homosexuality receives special status in the church and actually came to think all sin should probably be approached with the same depth of emotion as homosexuality is in the church. (notice i said homosexuality and not the homosexual.)

      The ‘straight’ individual that is a church member, myself included (i admit), feels as strongly as they do because they have a personal stake in the matter. We hold the union of man and woman to be true and exclusive as created by God. So just as a people group would feel about an attempt at perverting their culture by persons foreign to or partakers of said culture, we feel strongly about homosexuality whether inside or outside the church. it’s simple; we’re emotionally tied in to sexuality.

      The question then is, why do we not feel as strongly about other sins as we do homosexuality? Is it because we’re not as tied in to the things that ‘vex’ the father… for whatever reasons we may have? is it easier for us to summon feelings and take a stance on the the issue of homosexuality than we would on holiness or love? is it because we’re perhaps not as transformed in our minds by our fellowship with Christ as we ought?

      Might this be the possible breeding grounds for the easy believism being preached and practiced in the church today… that our ‘conversion’ was not a deep-seated realization of our depravity and death in sin and, hence, a total commitment to live for the man who died on the cross to set us free?

      That being said, i ought to say that it is easy to have these expressions toward sin out of a religious heart than out of communion with Christ. This is not right and only serves to wound and set back the very people that are the workmanship of Christ. The counterfeit often looks like the real thing and only those very versed in the real can tell the difference.

      It is however important to note that the men that shaped the course of the christian walk had a very definite stance on the issue of sin, and rightly so – Christ did. Right from the old testament through the new to the lives of men like john wesley and jonathan edwards and david brainerd (imperfect though they were), all had an emotional and pure stance against sin that drove them to love and to weep on behalf of them that were bound in it.

      Should we treat the homosexual as an outcast, absolutely not! except in certain cases where gay movements are trying hard to influence church beliefs. There are many ‘churches’ that believe in gay relationships. Find one and affiliate with it or spend time seeking God to move on the heart of them that don’t agree with gay relationships if you are seriously convinced He is. It is after all Him alone that can move on the hearts of men. The homosexual is not to be ill-treated or shunned any more than him that lies or gossips or ‘flips his finger’ at aggressive drivers on the road, if indeed he/she is earnestly, and diligently seeking the way of Christ as all in our congregations should.

      No! The homosexual ought to be wept and interceded for as well as the modern pharisee or them that wield stones ready to throw. Why don’t we do it? perhaps, we have not the love of the father in us as we ought, and our practice and speech is more lip-service than it is in deed. We all need to re-examine our hearts in the light of God’s word and see from His perspective of persons and issues. He loves man but hates sin. This love, which should dwell in all of us, is why He sent His son to die for us.

      As sons of God, we can’t possibly agree with homosexuality or any sin for that matter, and all sin should stir us up as much as it does Christ. Our actions, however, should draw the homosexual to desire the knowledge of God if indeed we know him and speak His word in truth and in love.

      Whatever our views may be on the ‘fine print’ in the author’s letter, we cannot ignore that summarily she points out a stereotyping that is subtly but rapidly sweeping over the church which must be cautioned against, lest we find one that is thirsting and hungry but withhold water and food from. That would not go down well with Christ at all.

      Stay blessed.

      P.S. Sorry for the length; i tend to not want to leave much room for doubt about my entire position on a matter. saves a lot of back and forth.

  53. Clark says:

    “When the word “homosexual” is mentioned in the church… Most often this word is followed with condemnation, laughter, hatred, or jokes. Rarely do we hear any words of hope.”

    I know this has happened, but I’ve never heard it. And, I hope, I’ve never done it. Sin may be condemned in a sermon without condemning the person. Only God truly condemns, and we are all condemned already without Christ.
    Laughter? Maybe a little nervous twittering because we don’t like to hear the word homosexual.
    Hatred? Never heard hate speech in a sermon about homosexual sin.
    Jokes? Not one. Never would I tell a homosexual joke or joke about so insidious a sin as this.
    As I said, I’m sure these things have happened, but is this really a big problem in churches that preach sexual holiness?
    I think the bigger problem is made by the “Rarely do we hear any words of hope” comment. We need to offer people hope. There is hope in Christ!
    Just as there is hope of the heterosexual who wants to indulge outside of God’s law. Just as there’s hope for the divorcing person, the glutton, the drug addict. There really is Hope in Christ as many who have been strengthened to have power over sin will testify.

  54. Katerina says:

    To the Author: I’m so sorry, if anyone has made you the butt of their jokes, felt condemned or otherwise treated you without love.

    I think what’s important to realize is that the view of the Church is to love without bias. As some have said in their comments, everyone has their own cross to bear or battlefield. Some people do not know the power of their own words and the hurt they cause. They may very well be loving and caring individuals, but their words and manner convey otherwise.

    I applaud the woman who wrote this and hope for the day when everyone knows that we are all sinners and we all struggle, in our own ways, together, and that no sin defines a sinner.

    “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.”
    – Blessed Mother Teresa of Kolkata

  55. deanna bradley says:

    It took me a while to understand that the thorn in my side is no bigger or smaller then the thorn in a homosexual’s, gossiper’s, glutton’s, thief’s, addict’s etc… side. Remember, The wages of sin is death but the gift of God is Eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. There is only one sin that separates us from the love of Jesus Christ and that it to deny Him. All sin is an abomination. We are to love one another in Christ Jesus!

  56. Paul says:

    The truth hurts, but the truth brings life.
    The word is truth and it brings life.
    Show GOD you Love Him, by your actions and obedience to His word.
    Do not waste time with putting others down, but if you see a brother or sister doing something wrong, go to that person, and out of a heart of LOVE for that person, speak to that person. But as GOD’S WORD SAYS, “be sure there is not a log in your own eye first, before you remove the splinter from your brother or sisters eye”

  57. Alin says:

    When I was struggling with pornography and I heard the sin of lust talked about in church, I held my breath too, because I knew it was wrong. The very fact that you get anxiety when homosexuality is mentioned testifies that you know its wrong and you must change. Its conviction of sin and its a good thing.

  58. Paul says:

    I will say only this to everyone who comes to this site,
    Does what you “say” build up or “tear” down the church of GOD.
    Your own hearts will tell you the rest. But if your heart says nothing to you, then I fear for you that it has become numb to what is right and wrong.
    Goodbye to everyone on this site.

    1. Derek says:

      It would take a lot of courage to talk about a struggle with same sex attractions at most evangelical churches, even ones where you would be warmly and lovingly received. Mainly because it would cause people to think of them as “the person with an issue” that tends to label them. I think it might be similar to not wanting people at church to know that you have an issue with chronic depression. These are actually the kinds of things that might keep you from being considered a good candidate for Bible study leader or some other position of leadership, truth be told. Christians and churches really need to be taught to highly honor confidentiality (and encourage the same to members) whenever someone has the courage to share something like same sex attraction.

      This is probably something that would take courage to share in most any church environment (unless it is gay affirming), but we should make it as safe and nurturing as possible for people to find the encouragement and support they need.

  59. Rich says:

    I don’t believe this is an real letter. It is not sincere at least and fake most likely. One real concern is her statements regarding “Johns letter to the Church at Pergamum”. It is really not Christlike how she expresses her rational regarding the doctrine. I quote, “If we accept your willingness to compromise, then we must also compromise. We must therefore accept your lying, your adultery, your lust, your idolatry, your addictions, YOUR sins. “He who has an ear, let him hear what the Spirit says to the churches.” Where does she get off with this kind of sermonizing. She needs to repent and speak out in church if she thinks she is right regarding the attitude the church. Maybe she could start her own ministry for women that have come out of the “struggle”. The Bible clearly teaches that we are to have nothing to do with those that claim to be Christians but do not live in Christ. We do not judge those outside the church but those in the church. This letter is a fake by most accounts and is meant to stir up the church. The gates of hell with not prevail against God’s church. They can change the laws in this country and the Pope can marry gays but God and his people will not be surprised by the wickedness of the lost.

    1. Kim says:

      God does not wink at sin. That is true. Let me ask you, How does one become the righteousness of God? Through faith in the shed blood of Jesus or by their works? If we could have accomplished righteousness by our works, the law would have been completed in us and we would not have need of a Savior. But the law was given to show men that they could not. Jesus completed the law. Now we are saved by grace, not of ourselves that any man should boast. Perhaps a long look into love would enable you to see His goodness. God prefers mercy over judgement – let him who is without sin cast the first stone. No one, not even the writer, is condoning homosexuality. Her point in the above quote is that the church so often wants to put homosexuality in a class all by itself, as it once did with divorce, indicating that it is the unpardonable sin. Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind,
      1Co 6:10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God.
      The former thief that struggles, the elder that secretly covets his pastors position, the former alcoholic that ‘fell of the wagon’ last week will all find your grace to rise again and you would not think they would miss the kingdom of God. But someone struggling with sexual sin after their born again experience, you will throw away.
      There is a huge difference in condoning sin and providing mercy and grace – A RIGHTEOUS MAN FALLS SEVEN TIMES AND RISES AGAIN.

  60. Rich says:

    Only two kinds of people. One that loves sin and is mastered by it continually. One that loves God and hates all that God has proclaimed to be sin. Serve God!

    1. Lori says:

      So true, Rich! The world says “I’m not so bad, there are worse people than me. Besides, a loving God would never judge me, and either can you!” The believer says, “I sin, and I hate it when I sin because it grieves my father and impugns his Holy name.” The contrast in attitude is stark, and indicative of a true believer!

  61. Rich says:

    I like your first comment Paul. We must speak truth in love – if not them we are not disciples of Christ.

  62. confused Christian says:

    Lyn has asked some very fundamental questions that should be addressed. Where does sin come from? She says from our desires citing James, but does sin not also stem from our nature as fallen beings? Do we have a say in the sinful things we do (as they arise from the depths of our hearts desires) or are they out of our control due to our sinful nature.
    I know once we are saved, Christ gives us a new natrue, but the process of sanctification is often a slow one and this new nature may not completely manifest itself in our lifetimes even if we live very long lives. And so we continue to do things we dont want to do. Our DESIRE is willing but we remain weak. Lyn simply cannot imagine how homosexual urges can be involuntary since the author is saved.

    1. Michael A. says:

      No longer confused christian,

      Romans 6:12-14
      12 Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey it in the lusts thereof.

      13 Neither yield ye your members as instruments of unrighteousness unto sin: but yield yourselves unto God, as those that are alive from the dead, and your members as instruments of righteousness unto God.

      14 For sin shall not have dominion over you: for ye are not under the law, but under grace.

      Verse 12 makes one thing clear; the outward working of sin (obeying the lusts thereof) is usually a tell sign of what influence a person is under (sin reign in your mortal body). I’ve come to find that most issues we struggle against start to lose authority in our lives when we stop exposing ourselves to things that reinforce their power over us.

      Hence, the one who is looking to becoming a mature son of God, should spend more time in the word, prayer and fellowship with them that are like-minded. Often times, people preach staying away from things of the world without admonishing the believer to cling to the things of God. The former is useless without the latter, and the latter is weakened if not practiced hand-in-hand with the former.

      The very opening words to the statement in verse 12 present an interesting reality; “Let not” suggests that we are equal to the task of overpowering the enemy. it is often wrong doctrine and mindsets that bind us to the enemy.

      the child of God would be so much stronger against the enemy if we would spend earnest time meditating on the word and taking it for what it says and not what ‘experience’ dictates. while i value experience very much, our theology should not be formed from experience. it should be based solely on what the word says: the fact that many have ‘struggled with sin’ while being ‘saved’ does not validate the authority of sin. it merely depicts what is in the hearts and minds of men.

      I hope that sooner rather than later, the church as a whole will come to fully comprehend what was done on the cross and in Christ’s resurrection and live in the fullness of it, if indeed we have had a life-changing experience at His feet and are seeking Him diligently.

      Have a blessed weekend!

      1. Michael A. says:


        “The former is useless without the latter, and the latter is weakened if not practiced hand-in-hand with the former.” should read The former is useless without the latter, and the latter is weakened if practiced hand-in-hand with the former.


        1. Michael A. says:


          i was actually right initially, lol. spun myself into a web there, huh?

  63. A. Morales says:

    1 John 4:11

  64. John Gordon says:

    Weird…this letter seems kinda…fake? She pleads for love and personal mutual acceptance which seems fine, but then she urges heterosexual Christians to please continue to condemn her sexuality as though it is an obvious conclusion.
    I have NEVER met (and I am friends with and know a LOT of gay and lesbian people) a lesbian who thought this way that wasn’t horribly confused and conflicted. She wants to be accepted, which is right, but she continues to believe and affirm hateful and misinterpreted teachings based on 2 or 3 verses at the most!
    If I met this woman, I would tell her that I accept her and proclaim that she has been set free by Jesus Christ and she does not need to change her sexuality – she needs to accept who God made her to be and trust that Father knows best!

    1. Michael A. says:

      John Gordon,

      God did not, is not making, and will never make two members of the same sex to engage in sexual relationship. Period! …and i won’t even begin to quote scripture to that effect.

      BTW, ever wonder why you never see a male animal lie with another male animal? ever heard of someone crossing a male dog with a male dog?

      1. John Gordon says:

        Michael –
        Are you serious? Nature is FULL of animals who engage in same-sex activity. Regardless, what do the sexual activities of animals have to do with human beings?

        1. Bob says:

          While I agree with Michael’s point about God and homosexuality, John is factually correct about homosexuality in nature. In higher mammals (monkeys and dolphins, to name a couple) homosexual relationships have been observed in many cases. I also agree with John in that the sexual activities of animals do not relate to our own sexual activities as followers of Christ.

          I do believe that homosexuality is a sin, and also that it can be forgiven like any other sin. We should be loving and supportive of our Christian brothers and sisters who struggle with this area. I certainly would not wish a hateful attitude upon those who struggle with homosexual desires, but I also think that it should not be forgotten that homosexuality is a sin. This should not change our treatment of our brothers and sisters who struggle with these desires, and is certainly not cause for hateful attitudes or discrimination.

          1. John Gordon says:

            Thanks, Bob, for your kind response. By the way, can you show me where Jesus describes “homosexuality” or ANY kind of sexuality for that matter, as a sin?

            1. Derek says:

              Jesus spoke about the issue of lust in Matthew 5 and what makes this interesting is that he actually raised the standard set in the Old Testament. He focused on it as a heart/worship issue more than it was a behavioral problem. Paul comes at it from the same angle in Romans 1. But Christ’s most explicit words regarding all illicit sexual behavior is in Revelation 2 when he issues a strong warning to a particular teacher who was leading people into sexual immorality.

    2. Kaerina says:

      Thank you! Internalized oppression. She has sadly internalized others’ misplaced judgments on her and sees herself as “bad” and “wrong”… when actually, she is just, well, herself.

  65. Nikole Hahn says:

    I don’t know if the letter writer will see this, but I hope she knows many also want to love her. The reason so many people are angry in this issue is because the homosexual community (the militant ones…I understand that not all homosexuals are militants; it would be like saying all atheists want to take down Christian crosses)are working with the laws to force their lifestyle upon us, our children through schools, in movies and television shows, and through garish public parades not fit for children. I absolutely loved this letter. It is so true. We need to take down our masks in church and help each other grow in Christ, not by changing the Word of God or diluting it to appease our desire to sin (whatever that sin may be), but through teaching, kindness, accountability, encouragement, etc. WAY TO GO!

  66. Bob says:

    I would just like to say, kudos to almost all the above commenters for keeping this discussion very polite and not antagonistic. This issue can lead to a lot of strife, but the discussion I’m reading between people with different opinions is very polite, respectful, and uses God’s Word to try and back up arguments. This is a great example of what a discussion should be between those who love Christ; we should try to model our discourse after what we see here.

  67. Denis says:

    Thank you my sister thanks you, the words of Christ are decendu on earth. Is holy blessed my sister. We all have blind spots in our lives including myself, and I want to help and love others as I love that he loves me.

  68. gary says:

    We tend in our fellowship to see homosexuality similarly to alchoholism, whereas it is a behaviour brought about by a combination of genetic predisposition and social conditioning. We do not buy into it being a condition that cannot be helped any more than alcoholism, also genetically and socially connected, cannot be addressed and helped. Neither does our society consider alcoholism acceptable, which i find a tad hypocritical. Anyway, we love and pray for both, knowing that no person is beyond the reach of God, Who takes no pleasure in judging sin: neither should we. But for the grace of God, there goeth I.

  69. Oh, my. This was beautifully written, sweet sister in Christ. And you are spot on.

    Our contemporary culture and our churches have made such a mess of sexuality, haven’t we? I pray daily for Abba’s grace as we all raise our children to have a right view of the bodies He has given all of us, our own as well as those of others.

    My love, from the abundant overflowing of love from the Lord, to you. Thank you for sharing this letter.

  70. Darrel says:

    If a person continues to battle with the same sins he did prior to “asking Jesus into my heart” HE IS NOT BORN AGAIN. He is self-deluded, excusing his sins because he still LOVES TO SIN. Col. 1:13; Col.2:11 and Rom.6:14. If sin still has dominion over you, YOU ARE NOT SAVED.

    To those who would have others believe they are “brothers in Christ” and still love their sin, excuse their sin [“because God made me that way”], and do not have the a vile contempt for the sins they held to prior to their “conversion” I would suggest a read of 2Cor. 13:5; because there is a 110% chance that you are still in your sins.

    1. lyn says:

      amen brother. The church has forgotten its calling concerning someone who engages in sin –

  71. Josef hauner says:

    This is to those who struggle with sin period as Christians.The real issue here is people having an identity crises because they do not know who they really are in Christ and what Jesus did for them.Real change does not come by trying hard to quit certain sins actually it makes it worse because you empower sin when you wrestle with it. I speak from experience. That thing of trying to be righteous by your own efforts and behavior is destined to fail, it never works. The apostle Paul said oh wretched man that I am- he said that when he was trying to be good in his own efforts and found that there is no goodness there. Then he said who will rescue my from this body of death out of sheer desperation and the he had a re-revelation that Jesus already finished all that was necessary for him to be free and instantly went back into victory in Jesus. When a believer really pursues righteousness they will find it nowhere else but Jesus and that righteousness is a gift from him. That is the true gospel. When you begin to believe the true gospel, you will see that you are the righteousness of God himself if you are born again, you are holy, blameless, pure and totally accepted and forgiven for all your sins (past, present, and future. If anyone wants further discussion on this I am here ask to be friend and I will accept and we can go deeper. A preacher who can be of great help on this is Joseph Prince you can find him on the net and many Christian television stations. Blessings.

  72. Ray Slocum says:

    Mercy sakes , I have been inundated with opinions and find that the majority agree with this issue and the church. The writer of the original letter obviously is very confused and does not need encouragement to go on as she states as a certain few are confused themselves in saying . The sin of Lesbian / Homo is what it is , no if ands or buts!! Period ! It does not belong in the church as “trying” make it gone! The final word is quite obvious and does not need everyone to keep saying the same thing as well as few straglers still trying to impose it on us all it is okay as long as trying to overcome! God commands us stay away from sin! RS

  73. Love covers a multitude of sins. Why do we insist on uncovering them in public?

    Noah’s sons refused to look upon their father’s naked drunkenness. In so doing, they preserved his human dignity in their OWN eyes. They needed to preserve his place and dignity as their leader-father in order to continue in unbroken fellowship of family and community. Noah didn’t go out the next day and ask for forgiveness, judge others as being too holy/hypocritical to accept his drinking “disease” or otherwise demean his God-given dignity. If he felt sheepish or unwelcome after being so grandly “covered,” that’s his own heart problem.

    But, all this hand-wringing is false. The seemingly temperate appeals for understanding are based in a false-hearted need to uncover one’s sins to the wrong judges. If God loves you and has forgiven you, walk on in your journey, pray in secret (we ALL have a closet!), and do not seek wide acceptance or the false codicil of “understanding.” Forgiveness is not about “understanding” or “acceptance.” It is much harder than diamonds, more real and abiding. You have need of nothing else from Christians except that you allow yourself to be covered, your dignity intact. Can you let us do that? Or is your own particular need greater than that of your brothers and sisters in Christ?

    Have you considered that the divorced, who are far greater in number than homosexuals, face an even stronger condemnation in the New Testament? But their years of conferences, healing prayer, bible studies, and cries for understanding, have made divorce almost entirely acceptable to the modern Church. This “acceptance” has not yielded the peaceful fruit of righteousness in Church communities. Peace for the individual, sure, of some sort. The rest of us? Not so much. But we cover. And cover.

    So, please understand what I mean when I say, “shut up.” Is that hard? It’s hard for everyone who is struggling with sin. We’re not allowed to parade our depravity because it destroys fellowship, erodes dignity, and believe it or not, it encourages others to sin. It does.

    1. Lori says:

      Joan of Argghh! (Love the clever name) You are coming at this from a different angle, and it is very thought-provoking, and in my opinion contains much truth. I honestly have never thought of the issues revealed within the church in this way, and not considered the long term impact of such revelation and focus as we have done with divorce. Thank you for posting, it has enlightened me.

  74. rich says:

    Good point John Gordon. Michael is talking about science and making statements regarding “same sex relationships in animals”? That is so out there. To say that animals, that have no conscience or higher level cognition can have same sex “relationships”. bullhockey!

  75. jerry cooper says:


  76. Debbie says:

    Precious Sister in Christ, I sit here crying as I read your words and they pierce my heart so deeply. I wish I knew you. I wish I could call you right now and meet you within the hour and hug your neck and talk about our Jesus so that both of us could find hope and healing and wholeness. For yes, you have said it well, we are both sinners. Mine is different from yours and it matters not, both of us are sick and need His healing. I don’t know you but I love you for your heart of truth. I love you for your heart which seeks hope in Him. And may I say, there is hope. There is hope or He is not who He claimed to be! What does He offer? He offers you the strength to say no to your particular temptation, just like He offers me strength for my particular temptation and I do have one. Let me say this, I have lost more battles than won with my sin. And for so long I thought because I still desired what I craved, then I must not be healed. That is not true! For some, yes, He delivers from the desire, but for others He delivers IN SPITE of the desire! As each temptation comes there is grace, abundant grace, to overcome in that moment to not act on that desire! Is that difficult? Of course! But I have decided to live in freedom and to accept His grace each moment of each day to overcome the desire of my heart that is not pleasing to Him.
    You are so precious….so very precious. So brave. You see clearly sweet sister. He has given you eyes to see while so many are still blind. You are blessed. I will pray for you daily. Please pray for me.

    1. Yvonne says:

      Beloved sister in Christ, Debbie, at last I’m reading a comment that contains the feelings of Christ for another, who belongs to the Body of Christ. Would, that we would value all members of this Body as He does.
      Grace upon grace.

      1. John Shenk says:

        Indeed. Blessings, sisters.

  77. Cassandra says:

    I agree with the first part of her letter. I don’t attend church because of the hypocritical ideas in most churches today. One affiliation putting down another in Gods name. I have never read any where in the bible that one was better than the other. The sermon of the mound simply put says we are to love one another as we love ourselves. it is hard to see what the church has become. Mostly with greed and pride leading it path. as far as the churches who are accepting of this life style. I do not think they are altering Gods word to lure you or fool you in any way. They are just willing to take the Word of God in it simplest way and leave your choices be dealt with between you and God. No human can change who or what they are with out God. There fore why should another Human judge. I am a firm believer in If my eyes and intentions are on God and his ways then I do not need anyone else’s judgment or problems. My heart is with God. He alone will decide my fate.God alone will alter me and path to suit him.

  78. Darrel says:

    “Love covers a multitude of sins” and a hearty AMEN if your are refering to the Love of Christ as demonstated on the Cross.
    “Why do we insist on uncovering them in public?” The real question should be: “Why do we seek to excuse our sins before men and God?”

    It seems to be the latest fade in “church” to find every reason (excuse) to justify ungodly desires and behavior and put a “God loves you” sticker on it. The end result is that the Gospel and Christ Himself are morphed into a weak, inimic, powerless “savior” who has given you a “get out of hell—free” card and left you to your own evil lusts and desires while on earth ’cause He can’t help you overcome you sins. BLASPHEMOUS LIES.

    So many want to play the “poor me” card-I just can’t seem to stop xyz/abc sin. They do not realize that Christ died to deliver them from the power of sin-Rom 6:14. It has become OK to hang on to a lust and fight against the sin as if to become a champion of some sort to your fellow ‘church members.’ You want to hang on yo your lust? fine, but realize that you cannot be saved and continue in lust and/or sin. Don’t believe it? Try Luke 14:26. If you do not HATE your own life you “CANNOT BE MY DISCIPLE.” “And whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me CANNOT BE MY DISCIPLE.” That was Luke 14:27. And in Luke 14:33 we are told: “So likewise, whoever of you does not forsake all that he has CANNOT BE MY DISCIPLE.” And finally Luke 9:23&24. Deny yourself [YOUR LUSTS] take up your cross DAILY. If you want to save your life [YOUR LUSTS AND SINS] you will LOSE IT.

    The real Gospel teaches us that Christ not only forgave our sins, but delivered us from their power NOW. The other gospel (Gal 1:6-9) allows for lust and sins to continue unabated. There is no salvation in the ‘other gospel’ and if you think there is then you have believed the lie of the anti-christ (2Thes. 2:11), the false hope and assumptions you cling to are really the “strong delusion” sent to you directly from the Throne of God. Tread carefully.

    1. Darrel, I thank you for reading the first sentence of my post and little else. Had you read it all, there would be no need for the “if” of your commendation to me. Maybe you do that as a habit.

      My point is that the letter writer is seeking a sort of balm for her conscience. Forgiveness is not yet real to her. That is not the fault of her Christian fellowship so much as it is her seeking relief from hurt feelings. But Truth remains immutable and does not bend in order to comfort, it is Love that dies in order to transform our mind, soul and body into an eternal vessel of honor to God.

      And I think the letter writer is willfully blind to the very real gay agenda activism that, much like the feminist agenda has concrete designs on undermining the Church. The Church in her role in society must not be muzzled by individually hurt feelings. The example of Christ was to whip and beat the money-changers in the Temple, who no doubt felt much abused. Weren’t they also chosen by God? Chosen, certainly. Rebuked? Unmistakenly.

      Rebuke is hard. Forgiveness is real. It comes from Christ’s sacrifice on the Cross, not from comforting sounds from one’s church companions.

      1. Yvonne says:

        Hi Joan of Arrgh,

        Could you please explain a little further about your comment:

        “But Truth remains immutable and does not bend in order to comfort, it is Love that dies in order to transform our mind, soul and body into an eternal vessel of honor to God.”

        I am especially confused about “it is LOVE THAT DIES in order to transform our mind..etc.”? I have never heard a quotation before about love dying so that we may be transformed. Surely it should be the opposite?

        Maybe it is me that is confused.


        1. Forgive my poetic license, it has likely expired: A love that dies for us, in our place. Don’t worry, it resurrects us as well, with His resurrection.

          It could be a long and fruitful discussion about Jesus driving out –with whips and imprecations!– the money-lenders who were facilitating the purchase of the required (by Law) sacrificial offerings, all the while intending in His very real flesh,to die for their salvation. What a bountiful meditation we could extract from that moment!

          The first Law is Love. The first Truth is eternal. Our first recourse for comfort, for mercy, for meaning, is in Christ. Our brethren may or may not exhibit that perfectly.

          1. Yvonne says:

            Ah! Bountiful indeed. It was suffering “Love” that took Jesus to the cross for us, and “love” led the way for victory over sin and death. For God so “loved” his only Son that whoever believes in him will not perish but have everlasting life.”

            The true essence of God being love in perfection. If we can even have a touch of that kind of love while in our mortal bodies!?! wow…is all I can say….but I do believe I have been touched by this love more than once. Amazing grace! I am blessed.

  79. Ken Godevenos says:

    Wow, who would have expected so many comments on this original post. I think we’re all trying to address an issue that is very emotional — for we all have friends or relatives that may be impacted. Some of us want to do the right thing by “all the world”. Some see their own sin and feel unqualified to judge others (which we should never do; but that is different than judging one’s behavior or actions). We all have preconceived ideas — and from a human perspective, we are all right (or wrong) to varying degrees.

    May I suggest that we need to allow God to deal with this difficult question. Most of us would agree that He has spoken on it clearly. He finds the ‘practice’ of homosexuality unacceptable — as He does the practice of phony worship or adoration of Him; as He does adultery, gluttony, greed, envy, and so many other things. Let’s start with that.

    Then let’s move on to the fact that God expects His children to love others — regardless of their sins. Let’s agree on this second point.

    Thirdly, we would then need to come to terms with the ability to love someone without condoning their practices of sin — be it homosexuality or be it adultery or be it cheating on a test, etc.

    If we could do those three things consistently and well, and are united as a body of Christ in so doing, the world would have less trouble with us and our position. They may not like it, but they cannot accuse us of being inconsistent, or unfair, etc.

    Any other position than the above either from Christians, or by Christian, or in the expectations of others (non-Christians) would be contrary to what God is requiring of us, and would be still yet another sin on our part. (Notwithstanding that we also sin if we cannot love as required and indicated above.)

    Now, let’s stop talking and arguing so much about it, but instead, go out — love, do not condone the sin (any sin), and be consistent. And while we’re at it, let’s start being as hard on ourselves with our own sins — of any kind.

    Blessings, Ken Godevenos,

  80. Susan says:

    I have dear homosexual friends and our church would never tell a homosexual to leave.

    The bible is clear that homosexuality is an abomination:

    Leviticus 18:22:
    You shall not lie with a male as one lies with a female; it is an abomination.

    Leviticus 20:13:
    If a man has sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They are to be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads.

    1 Corinthians 6:9:
    Thou shall not lie with mankind as with womankind,…. By carnal knowledge of them, and carnal copulation with them, and mixing bodies in like manner: this is the sin commonly called sodomy, from the inhabitants of Sodom, greatly addicted to it, for which their city was destroyed by fire: those that are guilty of this sin, are, by the apostle, called “abusers of themselves with mankind”

    1. Derek says:

      Susan, as far as homosexuals in our churches, it is important to create three categories, because they are each distinct and we can get really mixed up in our thinking if we blend the categories of persons together.

      Category 1: A seeker who is exploring Christianity and Christ – this person should always be warmly and sensitively received!
      Category 2: A person who has become a Christian and struggles with temptation in the area of same-sex attraction – this person should be warmly received and cared for as well. They need our prayers and our support. They should be encouraged to confess their sins and receive our support, not our condemnation or judgment.
      Category 3: A person who says that they are a Christian, but rejects the Biblical teaching [that sex is reserved for a man and a wife in the confines of marriage]. This person should firmly be told that they are operating outside the boundaries of Christian orthodoxy and they must not receive communion or be called a believer, because they have rejected the authority of Scripture, which operates as the bylaws of our society called the Church. No society can function properly if its members reject the very tenets of its foundation. Read I Corinthians 5 and Revelation 2 – Scripture is very clear about how to handle Category 3.

      1. JAS says:

        Well said, Derek. That’s a very helpful comment.

  81. kimbee785 says:

    No sin is greater or less significant to the Father, than denying the Holy Spirit. I have always said that we can and are commanded to love one another. As I walk in sin and seek God’s healing, I am often told of my own sin and how it should be overcome. It is no different. No less or greater sin than one who is living in homosexual lifestyle. And for those who have accepted Christ, are aware of the sin that is in them and are struggling to overcome that or any other in their lives… we continue to lift them up in prayer and encouragement. Not judgement. I am grateful to the ones in my life who speak in love to me about my own struggles to overcome bad habits. I pray that this woman has a sister or brother who will do the same for her. We aknowledge the sin, and turn away from it. As Jesus said, go, and sin no more….a lot easier said than done, I’ll grant you that, but it is the hearts desire to overcome the lies that Satan whispers in our ears that ‘no one’s perfect’, ” sin doesn’t matter’…”Afterall, didn’t Jesus say ‘you are forgiven, once and for all’? But the key is to :” Go, and sin no more… in otherwords. To turn away from it. What a blessing it is to read this letter. A letter we all should engrave on our hearts as we move forward on our own paths to HOME>..

    1. Patrick Duncan says:

      It isn’t exactly true that all sin is the same. Jesus says that it is especially dangerous to harbor unforgiveness or to lead children into sin, for example. Proverbs 6 describes sins that are particularly detestable in God’s sight. I Cor. 6 says that sexual sin is unique and Ephesians 5 elaborates on this even more. Hebrews 11:15-17 also warns us about the unique dangers of sexual sin and again on bitterness and resentment.

      Yes, it is true that all sin shares in common that it will separate us from God. And Christ’s blood can cover any sin, as long as we repent and do not reject the witness and conviction of the Holy Spirit. BUT, some sin is more dangerous to our souls and families and churches and individual lives. All we have to do is think of the difference between the sin of siblings fighting each other and the sin of a repeat pedophile. Romans 1 and I Corinthians 6:9 as well as these other passages suggest that certain habits reveal an deeper problem than the sin acts by themselves – idolatry.

  82. Matt says:

    Wow Great letter

    See here is the deal, yes homosexual behavior is as sinful as adultery. But, even though adultery in the mind is defined as sin by Christ, no one is going to label you an adulterer unless you actually have sex with someone. Neither will you be labeled a kleptomaniac or thief unless you steal something. Nor will you be labeled a murderer unless you kill someone, or an alcoholic unless you have actually been addicted to alcohol at some time.

    But a kid who is attracted to his or her own sex gets to sit in church and be called a homosexual, a queer and a fag, EVEN IF HE OR SHE IS STILL A VIRGIN AND INTENDS TO STAY SO FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES!

    On top of that, any message of forgiveness is usually a one sentence statement like “of course, Christ forgives all sin” at the end of some 3 page rant about the evils and abominations of homosexuality. That just makes forgiveness look like a handy excuse to really rag on us homosexuals.

    So, yeah, I really like this letter because it tells it like it is. We can either go to churches that condemn us for facing temptation or go to churches that tell us we are stupid for choosing to remain celibate. Or we can go to churches that don’t talk about homosexuality at all and just leave us to get beat up by the other two.

    But what is almost impossible to find is a church that welcomes us, respects us and tells us they are glad we are here.

    And the sad thing is, I actually like Christians. In all other respects they are really nice people to be around. So many good things exist in the world today because of things Christians have done.

    It just really really hurts they can’t like me because of something I can’t change.

    1. Just between you and me, Matt, I will never tell you of my sins and temptations because they are shameful.

      See, I don’t need you to save me, accept me, or counsel me. I need you to be my brother in Christ. I do not want to be your counselor or to even have to think about what your personal temptations are.

      Temptations have an insidiously contagious ability to reproduce in another’s mind. I will NEVER burden you with my secret burdens, I will always protect you from darkness. None but God and my mature, spirit-filled confessor/counselor need ever know. You’d hate me and reject me if you knew, and I could handle that. What I couldn’t handle is knowing that, seeing me in Church, worshiping the living Christ, my Savior, and appearing to you to have it all together, enjoying love and fellowship, you be tempted to think that you can stumble in a likewise manner and get back up unscathed. What a wretched thing for me to subject you to!

      Self-centeredness thinks its own horror, burden, trial, etc., is the only one that is rebuked and rejected. This is a lie from the pit of Hell. If we love God, our sin is ever before us, our salvation is ever more precious, our sacrifice for the sake of our brethren ever more necessary.

    2. lyn says:


      The bible commands sinners to repent, even if you don’t act out on your homosexual desires, you are still entertaining them in your mind. There must be a renewing of the mind {romans 12:2}. As for not being able to change, you are right, you cannot change because you are dead in sin {Ephesians 2:1,5}, you must be born again by God {John 3:3}. Sin enslaves all, Christ frees sinners from that bondage {John 8:34}. The Spirit of God regenerates sinners {John 3:6,8}and brings them to repentance. The church cannot give you a magic formula to become a Christian, unfortunately, they do. They tell you to repeat prayers, to invite Jesus into your heart, to make a decision for Him. None of those methods are biblical, they produce false converts who are not born from above, do not understand the desire to pursue holiness and Christ-likeness, and have no comprehension of sin and its origin. Sinners are saved by God’s grace, as He gifts them with faith to believe and eternal life {see Ephesians 2:8-9}.

      May the Lord God draw you to Christ {John 6:44}, may He make you alive {Ephesians 2:1,5}, may He gift you with eternal life. May He cause you to see all your sins as He does – wicked, detestable, a rebellion against Him, and what sin will cost you- eternal damnation. May He have mercy on you and be gracious to you. May you see Christ and His death, burial, and resurrection as your only hope for reconciliation back to a holy God. Christ died for the ungodly, to save sinners from God’s wrath and sin’s powerful bondage. He gave Himself, shed His blood, took God’s wrath, became a sin offering…and He was without sin. The wrath of God was spent on His Son for those who trust in and commit themselves to Christ.

  83. Ken Godevenos says:

    So many of us here are still trying to “solve” problems — I hear people saying this and that — or “the church needs to recognize three different types” of homosexuals, etc. Get off your soapboxes friends! Call a sin a sin. Start loving as Jesus would. Don’t condone what He has said is wrong. But Love! Stay consistent to His word. Get the beam out of your own eye. (See my comment above.)

    1. Derek says:

      With all due respect, you’re wrong Ken. Yes, sin is sin, but Scripture makes a clear distinction in how we handle sin between believers and unbelievers; then there is a big difference between someone who is fighting the fight of faith (accepts Scriptural authority and repents when they sin) and one who openly defies Scriptural teaching. These distinctions need to be made.

      1. Ken Godevenos says:

        With all due respect to you Derek — what you say does in no way discount how I suggested we need to behave as Christians. All I implied is we as HUMANS need to stop trying to solve problems as humans. Before you start criticizing what I said, show me where in Scripture it says I am not to a) love the sinner — both Christian and non-Christian; show me where it says b) I should condone the sinful practice of both Christians and non-Christians. You sound like, but hopefully are not, a legalist. Whether a person comes to Christ or not, we are to love them and make it clear that what they’re doing is wrong. And while we’re at it — let’s make sure we are working on our sin. So, in all due respect . . .

        1. Derek says:

          Ken, yes, we must love others in every situation. My point is that our love will express itself in different ways depending on which situation a person is in. If they are an unbelieving homosexual, we primarily love them through leading them to the Gospel (and yes, part of the Gospel is showing people their sin, but Christ crucified and resurrected is our emphasis). In the case of a believer struggling with homosexual feelings, we love them by providing encouragement, accountability, prayer, support, admonitions and all the same loving Biblical prescriptions we would give to someone struggling with alcohol or laziness or gluttony. In the final case, the person who does not accept the authority of Scripture, but claims to be a Christian, we offer them Biblical discipline. I 1st Cor. 5 Paul calls it “handing them over to Satan”, and why would we do this? That “his soul will be saved on the day of the Lord”. So what appears on the surface to be harsh is redemptive in purpose. So the third scenario/category does look quite different than the first couple situations, but the common denominator is and must be love.

          1. Ken Godevenos says:

            Derek, I don’t want to get into a long discussion here — if the only way you can show a homosexual love as a Christian is to point them to Christ, then I can see why we are disliked and misunderstood as Christians. Sorry, but as a person of faith, I see that as our greatest problem — winning others to Christ. That’s the job of the Holy Spirit — ours is to live the life of a Christlike servant by just loving. Thanks at least for considering this, Derek. Blessings. Ken.

            1. Derek says:

              I never said that we can’t offer them (and by them, I mean it in the broader sense of any one who is not a Christian, not just gays) other things, but if those other things do not lead them to Christ and the Gospel, then we have failed. Would be interested to hear other people’s thoughts on this. I think pointing people to Christ is the most loving thing we can do: I Cor. 1:18 – “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.”

              1. Ken Godevenos says:

                Derek, you’re good at convincing me to keep responding which I did not want to do. I think we need to stop thinking of us “failing” or “succeeding” because someone comes or does not come to Christ. That’s a problem and faulty thinking. And makes so many Christians feel as failures and unworthy to called children of God. How legalistic! We succeed when we allow ourselves to be used by the Holy Spirit as He leads us — but not based on whether John or Jane accept Christ. Sorry, but in all due respect — we need to do what we are called to do “be his witnesses, nothing more, nothing less”. Blessings. Ken.

              2. Derek says:

                Ken, I think we’re arguing largely on semantics here and for some reason you feel a need to call me a legalist. Perhaps this is a term you like to charge others with; I encourage you to be more careful before doing so. Being quick to call a person a legalist can be a form of self-righteousness in itself – not saying this is the case with you, but food for thought. I agree that our success isn’t dependent on a person’s response to the Gospel. My comment focused not on the response of the person, but on the importance of leading unbelievers TO the Gospel. You’re right that it is up to the Holy Spirit after that, no disagreement from me there.

              3. Ken Godevenos says:

                Derek, for some reason I could not hit “reply” below your last response, so I am hitting it “above” your last response. I think that people who hold views such as “we fail when we don’t lead them to Christ” are legalist, Derek. Now, when I challenged that thinking, you backed down saying you didn’t mean that at all. Maybe we need to be careful in what we communicate so that we are not misunderstood. It is important to “point” to the Gospel and what Christ has done for us and explain that He can deal with whatever it is a person is dealing with if one wants Him to. That’s our job. For example, Derek — if you first “lead an unbeliever to the Gospel (and by that I assume you mean the “saving power of Christ” rather than actual text of Scriptures, then there is not much for the Holy Spirit to do as far as that person becoming a Christian. So, I have to assume that you since you agree that the Holy Spirit takes over “after that” you didn’t mean that you actually lead someone to Christ — but rather just make someone aware of Christ’s work in your life and that of the world. So, to me, and to others, words are very very important. I’m sure we both mean well — but let us be careful and rethink what we write — for other younger believers and many non-believers are watching us. Blessings fellow believer. Ken.

              4. Derek says:

                Ken, for the record I did not “back down”. If you look at the context and entirety of my comments you can see that I meant “lead” in the same way that you might say “you can lead a horse to water, but can’t make him drink”. I fully realize that you can lead a person to the person of Christ and the Gospel, but only the Holy Spirit can convert them.

              5. Ken Godevenos says:

                Derek: Thanks for proving my point on my original thoughts. Listen to you — “for the record” and “I did not ‘back down'” Your “lead” did in no way, in context, apply what you are saying now that it implied — you may have wished it did, but it didn’t my friend. You know very well what the generally understood meaning of “leading a person to Christ” means. So, let’s just agree to disagree as to what your were saying with your written words. I will back down and refrain from responding further on this one, brother. Have a great day tomorrow. Ken.

              6. Derek says:

                Well, Ken – if you’re going to split hairs and critique the exact wording of what I said, then I will critique what you said here: “as a person of faith, I see that as our greatest problem – winning others to Christ. That’s the job of the Holy Spirit — ours is to live the life of a Christlike servant by just loving.” Romans 10:15 says something different, Ken. It says that we must communicate the Gospel. Paul made a habit of explaining not only the good news, but the bad news with a message to repent as well (see Acts 3:19, Acts 25:24, Acts 17:30, 31) when communicating the Gospel. It is ultimately the job of the Holy Spirit to convince people, but it is our responsibility to articulate the problem (sin) and the solution (Christ and the Gospel).

              7. Ken Godevenos says:

                Derek: I’m going to let you have the last word and simply point out that you do well what most liberals do (which you are not) and that is ignore the point of the comments others make and raise new ones. Let me help you out a bit here — while I still maintain our job is not to “win others to Christ” — that’s a far cry from accusing me of not explaining the good news and offering the Gospel’s take on the other things you mentioned. BUT you do that after you/we have earned the right to share that in a way that it will be received willingly (even if not accepted) rather than ridiculed. Relationships first my friend. And that is what living the live of a Christlike servant is all about. Sorry, but you missed the mark here with your criticism, friend.

              8. Derek says:

                Ken, I don’t believe I’ve missed the mark. Please show me from Scripture rather than conjecture that we must have a relationship with an individual before we share the Gospel?

                Also, I did not use the terminology you ascribed to me, (“winning them to Christ”). I said “leading them to Christ and the Gospel”, which is precisely what we should be doing. Is it your common practice to put words in other people’s mouth? I hope not.

              9. Ken Godevenos says:

                Derek: You can believe whatever you like. And you keep on doing what you do — with great success in this day and age, I’m sure. Jesus is our model for how we are to share the Gospel — think of the woman at the well — He totally knew about her and got her to be interested in what He was saying and what He knew. Only then, He shared about the Living Water He offers. But you go ahead and do it your way, brother. I’m sure it works well for you since probably having a relationship may be too difficult for you.

                And now who’s “splitting hairs” — “winning them” vs. “leading them to Christ”. You’re word-smithing my friend and not using the words in their normal usage and how they are understood by most. Then when you get caught, you hide behind the “split hairs”.

                It is my common practice to correct people who don’t think before they criticize. You’re on your own now Derek, no matter what you write next, and I know you will, but wish you wouldn’t. Ken.

              10. Derek says:

                Ken: Does this mean I won’t get an apology for your twisting my words?

                How long did Jesus know the woman before he asked invasive personal questions about the woman’s sexual lifestyle? Did He know her 2 years? 2 days? 2 minutes? Don’t really see how that passage, of all the passages you could have referenced, backs up your argument! If anything, this story is a good example of how to show a person that they have sinned and fallen short of God’s standard, and then to lead them to the Gospel. And Jesus formed a relationship WHILE sharing this, not BEFORE. In other words, addressing sin and sharing the Gospel IS RELATING to people and it is relevant.

              11. Ken Godevenos says:

                Now I know it is because of people like you that non-believers consider Christians laughable at times, my friend. Don’t you see that Jesus could do in 2 minutes what would take you months and years — as far as knowing a person and their heart goes? You really are a number, aren’t you? But then again you know much better than so many evangelicals that hold this passage out as the prime example of relational witnessing. You’ll likely entice me to write again if you say something so “incredulous” that I just can’t let you get away with it, but then again, I may chose to totally give it the attention it deserves.

            2. Derek says:

              I agree with anyone who says that we must share the Gospel in a relational manner. But I disagree with someone who insists that we can only share after we’ve established a relationship with them or “earned the right to share”. That statement is without Scriptural basis. And by the way, some people will ridicule the Gospel no matter what. Paul tells us in I Cor 2 that the message of the cross is foolish and offensive to the world and to those who are perishing. So the sooner we realize that many or even most people will ridicule the Gospel (and us for sharing it), the better.

  84. Christopher Jacobsen says:


  85. Karen Mateeff says:

    We are all offered the same hope through Jesus Christ’s sacrifice. All we have to do is accept this gift and ask for forgiveness and turn from our sin. We all have it. I suggest you do not lean on your own understanding but read the bible. Learn about God’s desires for you. Believe in faith that he can and will do anything for you. He loves us all, but that does not give us permission to continue and live against his will.

  86. lyn says:

    “All we have to do is accept this gift and ask for forgiveness and turn from our sin” – here lies the problem with those who present this as a ‘method’ to being saved – this is NOT found anywhere in Scripture. The Bible nowhere tells us to ‘accept’ Jesus, we can’t do that. Why? Because all are born sinners, dead in sin, hating God…unregenerate. This is what Christ talked to Nicodemus about, Nicodemus was very religious, he knew the Old Testament and was the ‘elite’ of teachers in his day. However, he was void of being born again, or born from above by the Spirit of God; he was unregenerate. He was still dead in sin {even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved) – Ephesians 2:5}. God MUST do a work in the heart of the sinner before he/she can respond. Nicodemus surely read about this supernatural work, for it was spoken of in Ezekiel 36:26-27 “Moreover, I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; and I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will be careful to observe My ordinances.” It’s also found in Deuteronomy 30:6. I strongly encourage all to view the excellent teaching series on the ‘new birth’ found at

  87. Sarah says:

    Amen! Thank you for this reminder.

  88. Lynette Oien says:

    I really appreciate this letter. It is what I have oftened thought and what I believe. We all need repentance. Acceptance of sin in any of the forms it takes is falling short of all God has for us. He has wholeness and redemption for all. Let’s not give up our hope for change and let’s love one another without accepting sin.

  89. CJ says:

    Beautiful letter. Well said. Needing saying. Thank you.

  90. MIranda says:

    I’m sad that people have taken this opportunity to discuss homosexuality and whether she is repentant instead of supporting our brave sister. I’m not making excuses for sin and neither is she, we’re all calling a spade a spade here. I’m fully supportive of being accountable to our fellow Christians but lets not forget our own sin while discussing other’s, after all Jesus said, ‘Let those without sin cast the first stone.’ God has show me immeasurable patience and grace when dealing with some huge sin in my life, I can do nothing else than try and extend that same grace and patience to others while they come to repentence. I pray that we will know better how to love and care for people who have same-sex attraction and are standing firm in their faith (I have so much respect for them). I also hope and pray for a culture change in our churches where homosexuals don’t feel ostracised by unloving and insensitive jokes and attitudes.
    Thank you so very much for this letter.

    1. lyn says:

      How important is it to deal with sin in the church? Let’s see what the word of God says about it…

      ‘I wrote you in my letter not to associate with immoral people; I did not at all mean with the immoral people of this world, or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters, for then you would have to go out of the world. But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler–not even to eat with such a one. For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within the church? But those who are outside, God judges. REMOVE THE WICKED MAN FROM AMONG YOURSELVES.- 1 Corinthians 5:9-13

      Now do you see why walking daily in repentance is necessary? If she claims to be a lesbian, then the word of God is a lie. 1 Corinthians 6:11 states ‘and such WERE some of you'; this is in reference to two things…repentance and regeneration. If God has supernaturally birthed you from above, you will not be in sexual sin. If you say you struggle with sexual sin, it is because you are entertaining sinful desires in your own mind; which means your struggle is self-inflicted.

      John MacArthur has a sermon on his website dealing with sin in the church ––disciplining-sin-in-the-church

      1. Miranda says:

        Hi Lyn,
        I really can’t make any judgments about this lady’s life because I don’t know her or her story and I don’t have any intention of trying to figure it out from a short letter.
        The context of the verses in 1 Corinthians seem to say that we should have nothing to do with people who are boasting in their sin. Couldn’t agree more but I just don’t get that sense from this letter. It’s worth adding that Jesus in Matthew 18 gives a process for dealing with sin in the church. It’s fair to say that there is more to it than simply having nothing to do with a person who is sexually immoral.
        Whatever your opinion, I think you would have to agree with the thing that I love about her: she is telling us to not sell out. I think that’s something we’ve missed here. Christians who have compromised their beliefs to fit with the times instead of the Bible are discouraging to Christians who have same-sex attraction.

      2. kim says:

        oh for pity sakes!! She STRUGGLING with her sin, the same way as I struggle with stuff. Give the poor sister a break. God is working on her heart and will eventually help her. No wonder gay people hate us.

    2. Patrick Duncan says:

      Lyn, we could also add to your reference Ephesians 5:3-5, which says this: “But sexual immorality and all impurity or covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints. Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving. For you may be sure of this, that everyone who is sexually immoral or impure, or who is covetous (that is, an idolater), has no inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.” So Christians and churches should have a zero tolerance of sexual sin in our own lives and in our churches.

      Is there grace (unmerited favor from God) and mercy (withholding of deserved punishment) available to the believer who repents? Yes. I John 2 says “I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One.” But he also goes on to say in I John 3 “No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him.”.

      The lesson is this- we will stumble and fall, yes. When we fall, the Biblical prescription is confession before God and our fellow believers. This is the principle of accountability (see I John on walking in the light). The promise is that as we abide in Christ, He WILL lead us to maturity and power over sin. Not MIGHT – but WILL. We must trust God and believe in His power to help us through temptations of all kinds. Do not doubt His power and do not neglect the medicine or prescription He offers, because these are the means and agency of His grace.

  91. Chris Lefebvre says:

    Beautifully said! The same heartbreaking truths can be spoken to the church about those who are suffering from a past abortion! When we realize that we are all beggars, called to show other beggars where to find the bread??

  92. Laurie says:

    very well said…although I am not gay, I admit to being a sinner and pray for forgivness daily — I work hard to not judge others so that I am not judged. Bless you.

  93. Ken Godevenos says:

    Two more quick thoughts:

    1. Perhaps not intentionally, but after all is said and done we may simply (or additionally) be setting a new record for the number of comments on this blog.

    2. Secondly, I shudder when someone says (as someone did say somewhere above) that “I don’t think a loving God will judge me!” That’s a fallacy. God does judge and correct those He loves. And many of us who think we are His will indeed be told, “Depart from me for I know you not!” So, let us not continue in sin, thinking the lies that Satan has fed us that we won’t be judged because God is a loving judge. Unless of course, we also believe that you can build a castle that will last on the swamps of Florida.


  94. El Komo says:

    All she has said is fine – however her sin is as grave as the perverted man who keeps molesting children and comes back to ask for forgiveness. He knows his sin but keeps going back to it (esp when there’s no criminal law to throw him in jail).

    If truly repentant, she should give up her sexual & SELFISH desires to satisfy her new found person in the Lord. Its not an easy path, but its more fulfilling.

    1. Melody says:

      El Komo

      Do you mean like the sin of watching pornography that so many Christian men struggle with? Is that why we have accountability groups for them because it is so easy?

      She never said her sin was an action. Her sin is in thought and feeling. Something that heterosexual men are guilty of regardless if they are publicly confessing it or not.

  95. Alysa says:

    If we could only truly see each other through the eyes of Christ can you imagine what the church and church family would be like? God sent His Son whose blood was shed for each of us, to give us a hope of eternal life with him, to give us salvation. To wipe us clean, to justify our sin and make us righteous…to EVERYONE who believes in and Him and repents. We are all human, we all have sins and struggles. NO sin is worse than another in God’s eyes. His Grace and Mercy is available to all. We are called to love God, love people…period.
    My heart goes out to the writer of this letter. God bless you for your courage to speak out. I do not understand your struggle nor your sins any more than you would understand my struggles or my sins. I am thankful and glad to call you my sister in Christ. Would I break bread with you? Hang out with you? Accept you as you are? Absolutely! It is not my job to judge, it is not my job to try to tell you what is a sin or not. God is the only one we answer to. He is the only one who knows our hearts. I would proudly sit next to you in church, and I would proudly call you a friend and sister. If we never meet here on earth, I look forward to the day our Savior calls us home and makes us whole and perfect and I get to spend eternity with you.
    Take courage in your battle and journey as I will try to do with mine. God bless you girl!

    1. Yvonne says:

      Lyn,dear girl! “If you struggle with homosexuality, or any sin, then you need to study the doctrine of repentance.”??
      You are surely not suggesting the study of doctrine will free you from struggling with sin? If the study of doctrine is what freed you personally from this sin, then may I cautiously suggest that you have replaced one sin with another? Studying doctrine is of course not wrong, but the actual study of it does not free you from sin. Is there a possibility that you have overcome homosexual tendencies with an obsession of studying doctrine? Please, for your soul’s sake, do not make this type of study become a “law” unto it’s self. You are merely replacing one sin with another.
      love to you always, through Jesus, the Saviour of the body.

  96. Bill Blancke says:

    Great letter my dear sister. As a flawed member of the glorious family of God I was so blessed to read your letter. I think you are spot on. As a former pastor with a seminary degree who was forced out of a church I helped start because I was a work in progress I know to some extent what you are saying. I also want to say that sin is sin. Two verses that get me through Phil 1:6 “He who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it until the day of Christ Jesus”. 1John 1:9 “If we confess our sins He is faithful and just to forgive us ours sin AND cleanse us from All unrighteousness”. Now that is great news!!
    A great read regarding our journey of faith with regard to lapses and victories is the late Watchman Nee “The Normal Christian Life.”
    God bless

  97. John Gordon says:

    I would also add that there is an assumption that the “christian” poin of view is that homosexuality is a sin. And therefore, the assumption continues that we must condemn the sexuality of other people, while showing them God’s love.
    However, there are many, many of us who are Biblically convinced that homosexuality is not a sin, any more than heterosexuality is a sin. One can be a heterosexual or a homosexual and be living right with God. One can be a heterosexual or homosexual and be living a wrong kind of life.
    I would be happy to discuss (in a friendly and mutually respectful manner) exactly where from Scripture this idea that “homosexuality is a sin” comes from.

    1. Ken Godevenos says:

      Therein lies the problem. If one believes x is not a sin and the other person believes it is, then in today’s society — very few if ever will change their minds. Try going to a debate on Islam vs. Christianity, as an example only — do you really believe at the end of the day anyone changes his/her mind? Not likely. Unless the Holy Spirit convinces an individual that x is a sin (if he/she thinks it is not) or that it is not (if he/she thinks it is), then we get nowhere. One should search the Scriptures fully and totally and come to their own conclusion. All other arguments, for many, is just “hot air”.

  98. John Gordon says:

    Matt – believe it or not, ther is a change happening in the christian church and people are beginning to see that perhaps they have misinterpreted and misunderstood some Scripture, sometimes intentionally, sometimes accidentally. In the same way that Christians misunderstood and screwed up when it came to inter-racial marriage, womens rights, slavery, and on and on and on…ALL – every single one of these issues I just mentioned were “defended” by Scripture…however misinterpreted it may have been, at the time, most Christians believed “the Bible says it, I believe it, that settles it” when it came to slavery and the like. They just can’t see today that they may be in a similar position because it threatens their faith. Their faith is built on rules and ideas instead of a friendship, which is what Jesus offered his disciples – “no longer do I call you servants, but friends” Jeus said.
    Anyway, I want you to know that there are many churches that will not try to make you change the way God made you. Look for a United Methodist Church that is listed as “affirming” or “reconciling.” United Church of Christ churches are very open as well. Stay with it – you can make some great friends who can join you in your walk with Christ. :)

  99. Melody says:

    I just did a detailed study on sexual sins. There is no way that you can study the bible in depth and come out that God doesn’t care what you do with your body. The very fact that He sent His son to suffer and die in our place is a HUGE GIGANTIC CLUE.
    God cares greatly about sexual sin. He talks about those that leave the covenant relationship to join themselves to sexual immorality. It doesn’t end well for them.

    Those churches that you mentioned, people are leaving in droves and the people that applaud the sin do not bother going because they have other things they want to spend time on.

    When the Holy Spirit is absent then they are just buildings with people in them. And the Holy Spirit does not come into unrepentant people.

    1. John Gordon says:

      Melody – Not really sure where you get the idea that I said anything close to “God doesn’t care what you do with your body.” I said nothing of the kind.
      Secondly, I don’t know where you are getting your statistics (I suspect you are making them up) but church membership has risen in both of the churches and more and more people are attending. Please make sure that you are telling the facts before you make claims that are untrue. Remember what God says about a lying tongue?
      Ken – I agree entirely with what you said. Spot on. Very dificult for people to come to any sort of understanding when basic parameters are unstable. Let me suggest, as always, go the Bible. Read it in context. Not as a few clobber verses here and there to support a human idea. But get in there and really dig. Learn what the words mean, learn why certain words were chosen or excluded. I believe it’s on purpose.

  100. Katy says:

    This letter may be true of some Christians who are struggling with homosexuality and of course a real lover of Jesus would never condemn such a true brother or sister. But it is not true of the very LOUD movement going on in our society today. That movement does NOT see what they are doing as sin, and they want to vehemently and militantly force everybody else to say it is not sin also. They especially want to indoctrinate children – the next generation, because they want to wipe out the memory of what God’s Word says.

    Christians today are being vilified for believing that homosexuality is a sin. We are condemned as guilty hypocrites for simply believing the Bible. This is not right and we should not have to accept it, especially not for the sake of our children.

  101. Rich says:

    Thank you Katy. Fellow believers remember with what a price you were purchased. Remember also Heb. 4:13 There is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are NAKED and OPEN to the eyes of Him to whom we must give account. Do not be decieved by this perverse and wicked generation. Jesus warned his true followers. Many will come to kill and destroy. He will rebuke them as we should if they claim to be of God and openly profess it is good to sin and teach others to do so. Ask yourself where in scripture that this is EVER an issue. Why are we even talking about whether homosexuality is a sin? It is rediculous for Christians to even entertain such stupidity. Where is virtue and commmon since? This is not our battle. This is not of God. Do you really think this is of God. Please dont say you are not able to discerne if this is of God. Leave here and do not have fellowship with any so called “clubs of Satan” that babble vanities and set themselves up for the wrath that is to come. Remeber also how Paul instructed young Timothy. He told hime that, “There are many who display a form of godliness but they deny the power of God by their faithlessness”.
    Find a REAL church that lives out what the Holy Spirit actually professes in Gods word. The Spirit with allways line up with the word. Notice how they proclaim to be wise and God has made them foolish. Flee from Sin- especially all sexual perversion that harms one’s own soul. Self deluded demons are they. I am gone will no longer entertain this lie. The letter is just meant to stur up controversy. Paul warns Timothy also not to argue over fools words or controversies. Read Timothy and Titus. Proverbs 26:4

  102. Betty Knight says:

    If the LGBT’s of the world come asking for help, guidance, understanding and help of any kind, i feel sure they would not be turned away…but we have no way to know which are in church seeking deliverance and guidance unless they tell us…if they come and don’t speak to anyone about what they need, all we can do is see the obvious problem and pray for them…we can not assume that they come seeking help, but that they come just to seek being accepted as they are…it is very difficult to second guess anyone’s intentions…it is equally as easy to reach out to uplift those seeking guidance and love…i loved this letter i read and i hope somehow, many will reach out to the church (pray to be lead to a Church that is willing to help) and will find the truth and how to live it… God bless you… <3

  103. John Gordon says:

    Sigh…there is no “gay militant movement” folks. That’s just silly hyperbole. As a matter of statistical facts, percentage-wise, the chances that someone will be gay as an adult are statistically higher if they were raised in a heterosexual home, as opposed to having gay parents or a single gay parent!
    Secondly, you claim that they are “loud.” How loud would you get if your basic and equal human rights were being illegally withheld, based simply on whether you and your partner had a penis or a vagina between your legs? There are no legitimate grounds, besides prejudice, for not allowing a certain segment of our population to have equal legal rights, based solely on their gender. And yes, that’s what it boils down to. The Justice of the Peace does not inquire about either person’s sexuality, but their gender. And we have very clear laws that state that it is illegal to discriminate on these grounds.
    The only reason that some “Christians” wish to deny their fellow citizens these rights is because they believe that everyone’s rights should be subject to their religious beliefs. The problem with that is that those are the laws of a theocracy, not a democratic republic. Don’t you dare say anything negative about countries like Iran, because you are supporting the same types of laws!
    Finally, Rich – your lack of spelling ability is incredibly distracting. I think it’s important to be able to spell words correctly and to use correct grammar. Especially if you are using a written-language based form of communication as we all are online. I’m NOT trying to be mean – we ALL make boo0boos. But like I said, yours are so numerous that it makes me not want to take anything you say seriously due to my wondering just how intelligent you are. Sorry, man. Maybe we shouldn’t, but people really do judge you online on your grammar and spelling.
    But more importantly – show me where in the Bible that Jesus claimed that homosexuality is a sin. I would love to read that.

    1. Katy says:

      Quotes from Jesus, showing His intrinsic upholding of God’s (Torah) laws, and His complete stance against sin of every kind.
      “Repent of your sins and turn to God, for the Kingdom of Heaven is near.”(Mt.4:17)
      “Don’t misunderstand why I have come. I did not come to abolish the law of Moses or the writing of the prophets. No, I came to accomplish their purpose. I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not even the smallest detail of God’s law will disappear until its purpose is achieved.”(Mt.5:17,18)
      “If your hand…causes you to sin, cut if off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.” (Mt.5:30)
      “You can enter God’s KIngdom only through the narrow gate. The highway to hell is broad, and its gate is wide for the many who choose that way. But the gateway to life is very narrow and the road is difficult, and only a few ever find it.” (Mt.7:13,14)
      “Not everyone who calls out to me ‘Lord, Lord!’ will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Only those who do the will of my Father in heaven will enter. On judgement day…I will reply, ‘I never knew you. Get away from me, you who break God’s laws.'”(Mt.7:22,23).

    2. Sigh…there is no “gay militant movement” folks. That’s just silly hyperbole. As a matter of statistical facts, percentage-wise, the chances that someone will be gay as an adult are statistically higher if they were raised in a heterosexual home, as opposed to having gay parents or a single gay parent!

      You know nothing of statistics. Nothing. Sorry. Next.

  104. Carey Suber says:

    She needs to hear Binding the Wounds Seminar given by Ron and Nancy Rockey at (: Changed my life for the better, they are teaching the true Gospel the way Christ taught it.

  105. Danni says:

    There is one very large problem with this letter. Well, make that two. 1) The belief that there is a God. 2) The sad belief that the gay/lesbian community is “sinning”. How sad that the author feels that they need to claim they are wrong and need to try to change who they are because of a belief in an outdated fairy tale that has one or two scriptures eluding to the “sin” of homosexuality. I am so sad to read this. I wish people would study and learn the truth about the bible and Christianity. It is a hoax started to control the masses. It ruins lives! Be who you were born to be and forget this oppressive religion!

    1. Katy says:

      Dear Danni,
      This letter was written by a Christian to Christians. Christianity ought to be respected and allowed to be practiced as legitimate and authentic Belief, otherwise it is the Christians who are being discriminated against. We should be allowed to teach freely from and follow the Bible in its entirety. We ought not to have to change the words of our sacred Book to fit current, popular mindsets.

      True Christians abhor violence and hatred of any kind, including any towards people who the Bible would categorize as ‘sinners’. True Christians recognise that we are ALL sinners and that we ALL will struggle against sin of various kinds until the day we die. But a true Christian will not cease in their struggle (see Hebrews 12), because their hearts long to obey the One they love, “who first loved them.”

      Danni, I pray that you will soon encounter the reality of the God of Heaven who created you and who loves you and longs for you to know Him.

      1. Danni says:

        I will never stop speaking out against the evil of religion. If I keep silent, I am part of the problem.
        I do not know why christians think atheists are ignorant of their lifestyle. I spent 30 years as a right wing, born again, evangelical christian. I studied, I prayed, I served, I witnessed just like you tried to do to me. Then I began to study the origins of the religion. I studied the origins of the bible. I studied all world religions. I came to the conclusion that this is just one more myth among many. It will one day die away just like the Greek and Roman religions of old. I can’t wait for the day.

    2. Derek says:

      did you by any chance “study and learn the truth about the bible and christianity” from a Dan Brown novel? Just curious.

      1. Danni says:

        No, a novel is just that, a novel.
        I read books by educated people. Bart Ehrman is one. He is a professor of biblical studies. He has a PHd in Biblical studies. I read books on church history, mostly I read the bible for 30 years.

      2. Patrick Duncan says:

        I’ve listened to Ehrman debate before. He sounds really smart until he gets into a debate and you realize that the best arguments he has have been around for centuries. Actually his best arguments center on the “problem of evil”, or “why does evil exist?”. But that is a “problem” for any belief system, unless you just decide to do away with the category of evil entirely, which is really a dead end because if you go down that path then there is also no such thing as good either. All you’re left with is existentialism, nihilism or fatalism. Pretty sad set of choices. It drove Nietsche insane and it will drive you insane too.

  106. Mark says:

    “At least we recognize our sin.” – this is the crux of the matter and what essentially distinguishes the author from other more militant homosexuals (the majority?!) and those who wish to impose homosexual marriage upon the world. The Church is not here to judge but to lead people to Christ and to be a light to the world. People in the church are no better than anyone else nor are they given a mandate to judge – “Let him who is without sin throw the first stone”. None of us are and therefore acceptance of others regardless of lifestyle should be the norm. Jesus hung out with sinners. The church tends to ignore or look down upon them.

  107. jose melendez says:

    Luke 20:34-36

  108. Robert says:

    Can only think of what the Lord Jesus said to the woman taken in adultery: “Neither do I condemn thee. Go thy way and sin no more.”

  109. Alex says:

    WOW, first let me say that I have friends that are gay and lesbians. As a Christian man this is my take on this letter. I would try really hard to help anyone who was struggling with any addiction or sin in their lives. FIRST we ALL fall short of being sinless. Second if a person comes to me and tells me that they were “Born this Way” I would say maybe so “BUT” I know many alcoholics that think the same thing. “It runs in our family” True “BUT” I know Drug addicts who tell me that they just can not stop. “BUT” I personally know and I am also guilty of gossip from time to time. Usually I don’t even realize that I am doing it until I look back. I have also been guilty of judging people for either their looks or behaviors. Now I want to address the “BUT” that I put in this letter three times. BUT you tried that first drink, that first drug and that first sexual encounter. This does not mean your a BAD o Evil Person. It means the first step to RECOVERY is to admit your part in this sin. If you can not do this from the beginning then you will NEVER be able to take the next steps to RECOVERY. I CARE and LOVE everyone that I come in contact with. And let me tell you that FEAR,GUILT,DOUBT and ANXIETY Come straight from the devil himself. LOVE,COMFORT and FORGIVENESS Come straight from GOD. If Satin can convince anyone that they were “BORN” that way then he will have you in his back pocket from that minute forward. You will start to see the church as EVIL. You will see Christians as EVIL. You will confront anyone who tell you that being GAY is a SIN because you do not believe this from the center of your sole. You will spend the rest of your life trying to PUSH being gay into everyone’s face daring them to confront you. You will HOOKUP with any political organization that is GAY FRIENDLY and no matter what you will start to support them regardless of any wrong doing that they do themselves. OK PLEASE before you get all worked up and your ready to tear into me me like a PIT BULL DOG. I only ask one thing… Please look at this from a third point of view and don’t react to this with your emotions. If your gay then look at the drunk or the drug addict. If your a drug addict then look at the gay person. What would tell that “OTHER PERSON”?? And remember I am not perfect and I am a sinner myself. it will be a “STRUGGLE” for the rest of my life to be any different. I am NOT putting anyone down. Your sin is no different from mine. A SIN IS A SIN. We are all guilty of sinning. BUT if we all cane work together we can help each other and start to make changes in our lives today. I did not proof read this so I hope that I do not have a lot of typos.

    1. kim says:

      Awesome!! Preach it!!

  110. King Cole says:

    Everyone sins. To continue in that sin is not being a Christian. If you are truly repentant you would stop calling yourself a homosexual and you would refrain from the sin of homosexuality. To remain in your sin and continue to call yourself ‘born again’ is a contradiction. It is similar to a ‘Christian Jew’ or saying that a practicing Catholic is a Christian. You can be a Christian Catholic or a Christian Jew, if you want. But to be a Christian you MUST believe that Jesus Christ died for your sins and you must now repent (turn away) from sin, in whatever form it manifests itself in your life. A Catholic believes that Mary can be your intercessor to God and help in removing your sin. Later you can even buy your way out of sin by the use of ‘indulgences’. A Jew does not even believe that Christ has come yet! They do not believe that Jesus is the son of God and in that way are similar to Muslims.

    For the homosexual it would mean to turn from the act of same-sex sexual contact. If you are a Christian Jew, you would drop the ‘Jew’ part (because the two words contradict one another) and a Christian Catholic would drop the Catholic part of their name. To be a Christian is not to be mixed with other religious attachments, be they physical or emotional.

    A Christian attempts to follow the path that Jesus lead and taught us to follow. To be a Christian you must believe in the One (Jesus) He (God) has sent.

    Read the Bible. A King James version (KJV) would be preferable, but a New American Standard Bible (NASB) or even for beginners an New International Version (NIV), but something that is not mixed with all the new age junk you find so prevalent today.

    1. SS says:

      King Cole,

      This post displays a striking lack of understanding of the nature of Catholicism, Protestantism, Christian history, homosexuality, biblical translations and any number of other things.

    2. Annie says:

      “But to be a Christian you MUST believe that Jesus Christ died for your sins and you must now repent (turn away) from sin, in whatever form it manifests itself in your life.”

      If by “Christian” you mean “saved” then I must disagree. Christ’s death and resurrection is the ONLY thing that can save a person. If we are also required to repent from our sins, then our salvation is at least partially dependent on our own actions. We repent out of love for God and gratitude, NOT in order to make sure we are saved. Our salvation is completely God’s work, and none of our own. There is nothing we can do to affect our salvation.

      1. Katy says:

        Our salvation is completely God’s work, and yet, if we do not repent of our sin, we are not saved. This is one of the paradoxes of our faith. Wish I had time to write out all the Scriptures; perhaps someone else will. If we do not pursue repentance and holiness, we are cheapening the sacrifice of Jesus. But if we do obey and pursue repentance and holiness, we cannot take any credit: It is His grace that enables.

        1. Annie says:

          We cheapen the sacrifice of Christ by refusing to accept it as completely effective. When Christ was on the Cross he cried out “It is finished.” Our salvation begins and ends in Christ. You are saying his sacrifice is limited to those who do specific works. You are also saying you are capable of telling whether or not someone else is saved. Judgment is God’s alone, so I will not presume to say who is saved and who is not.

          1. Katy says:

            Yes, our salvation begins and ends with Christ. Yes, it is completely effective, as you say. “No one can boast” (Eph.2:9). HE alone is the precious Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world. Yet we cannot deny that Scripture clearly teaches that our obedience and our actions are intrinsically tied up with our salvation, in some mysterious way, even if it’s just a case of ‘essential evidence’. It is a paradox.

            “Yes, just as you can identify a tree by its fruit, so you can identify people by their actions. Not everyone who says to me ‘Lord, Lord!’, will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter.” Mt.7:20,21
            “If you love me, you will obey my commandments.”Jn.14:15
            “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross and follow me.” Mt.16:24
            “To those who use well what they have been given, even more will be given. But from those who do nothing, even what little they have will be taken away.”Lk.19:26
            “Faith by itself isn’t enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is dead and useless.”Jm.2:17

            1. Annie says:

              Christ’s death and resurrection is a two part transaction. He takes our sin on himself and dies, our sin dying with him. But there is the second part we must never overlook; he gave us his righteousness and his life. What fruit then, do I produce? What actions then are mine? Those of Christ. Christ’s obedience, Christ’s adherence and fulfillment to the will of God has been given to me.

              I sin. I disobey. I lack complete knowledge of all the evil I have done, and I lack the ability to remove my own original sin that I can say is still alive in me, even though it is dead in Christ. A paradox indeed.

              But I have been given Christ’s righteousness. I cannot boast of it because it was no action of mine; but that is the fruit by which I am to be judged.

  111. King Cole says:

    PS – What is the difference between homosexuals and lesbians? They are both drawn to their same sex and therefore are just plain old homosexuals. I guess you could say a female homosexual or a male homosexual, but to sub-divide the group into those two forms is self-deception and just another way to color the facts with something less confrontational. You are a homosexual if you have a desire for sexual contact with the same sex as you were born.

    1. Bob says:

      No difference, lesbian is just the term for a female homosexual.

  112. Yvonne says:

    To all my brothers and sister on this site: Grace and peace to you all. May the love of Christ dwell in you richly and may we, as members of the beloved Body Christ, with our precious Lord and Saviour, Jesus, as our head, support and help to hold one another up in the love and care that is befitting to a saved sinner, such as myself. The Lord left a commandment with us “Love one another”. Our beloved sister who wrote the original letter of this column is crying our for help and support, which we are duty bound to do: the Lords love for this Body of his demands it must be so.

    I see some posts “demanding” that our sister has to “think” a certain way before they deem her worthy of being called a “true” believer. This is not the grace and mercy that comes from above.

    The comment “being dead to sin” being interpreted as never being tempted by sin, is way off course, and makes a complete mockery of the death, burial and resurrection of our Lord Jesus. Until we receive our bodies of glory or are taken to be with the Lord,their will always be struggles with the flesh.

    Like Paul, I thank the Lord my God, that through the power of the Holy Spirit, that deliverance from sin and it`s temptations
    are available for all of us, but for anyone to “claim” they are completely delivered from this body of flesh, is audacious in its very nature. Quoting Romans: “There is therefore no condemnation to those in Christ Jesus” I was taught refers mainly to those who are now resting at peace in the arms of our Great Shepherd.

    Beloved sister Lyn and others who so harshly judge a suffering one: there is a spirit of self-righteousness and pride, which goes along with a Pharasiacal nature. The demands of the “Law” were met FULLY on the cross by the Lord, because not ONE of us are fit to live by the the Law.

    I for sure am one who suffers from the sin of pride, and I think most believers would say the same thing.

    Much love to you all. May we value each and every member of the Body of Christ, as is only befitting a forgiven sinner.

    Grace upon grace.

  113. Sharon Taylor says:

    She preaches a much needed sermon to the church to all sinners. Bless her!

  114. apelila says:

    I used to believe that homosexuality was a “worse” sin than all the ones I committed. I was wrong. I was deceived. I failed to see the truth about my Lord and His desire and abilities.
    I do not agree with the idea that people are “born” homosexual, I think these folks are also deceived, they can change.
    However, with the brainwashing that goes on in the media and the very powerful LGBT group, I don’t think people believe there is hope. Christians need to stand for male/female marriages only, (theres a March in D.C. on 3/26/13, support it) and we need to pray against evil principalities like the LGBT group. And of course we need to bear one anothers burdens and stop being hypocrites if we truely belong to Jesus.

    1. Mark says:

      Beautifully said, apelila!!!

  115. No. Just… no.

    We need a Puddleglum to stamp out the sickening sweet perfume of the false premise of the letter and the mewling oblations of the dear souls responding to it with a mass of emotional concern. The soul who wrote the letter is likely an unwitting accomplice in this entire farce and knows not how or why I should find it offensive to the Spirit. Not the subject of the letter, the spirit behind it. That the Gospel Coalition posted it without comment or guidance is doubly disturbing.

    I do not reject the writer, I reject her premise, her straw man, and the fruit it has borne here. I’ve tried, but in seeing the fruit of it, and the tendency of most who post here to either uphold, condemn, or judge the judgers– not to mention the massive acceptance of her premise and the suppositions of her allegiances in great numbers in our midst– I just can’t give serious credence to it as a worthy discussion. But I’ve tried.

    I cannot rightly support the letter nor the publishing of it as some sort of godly admonition to Christ’s Church, nor instructive in any way except in showing other homosexuals how to sow confusion into the ranks of Christianity.

    Is the writer offended? Let her go to the leaders of her church fellowship, as we are instructed, and let her be accountable to those that know her. Let her be heard by her priest, confessor or counselor. If her complaint has any merit, let her submit herself to those with the oversight of her spiritual progress and to their remedies, not to strangers on the Internet. I don’t know her except by her complaint.

    I will NOT indict brothers and sisters unknown to me on the testimony of an anonymous letter. She doesn’t need our judgment, and yet she has submitted hers to that of strangers, in hopes that she can get others to judge her own Christian family for her. She has more problems that stem from wrapping herself in a group identifier than standing before the only Judge. She has nothing to fear from any of us on this thread, and nothing to learn, least of all from me, since she really didn’t ask for enlightenment, but demanded that which it is not our place to supply.

    1. Katy says:

      I think I understand some of what you are trying to say. I think you made a very important point earlier that talking about sin to the wrong audience does indeed lead to permission giving. We humans are just so childish in that way. I don’t like my toddlers watching other toddlers throw tantrums in the supermarket because I know they will tend to copy! If they see it happen, I always make sure to tell my child that it’s WRONG, not because I am judging the other child (whom I usually feel compassionate towards), but because wrong needs to be called wrong.

      This internet age has a lot to answer for with the way sin of all kinds is gratuitously leered over in the name of ‘connectivity’.

      I think the author of this letter is asking for homosexuality to become as acceptable a sin as any other, because she is feeling lonely in her struggle. Many of us can fall into this trap, when we talk with our sins of all kinds with our friends, and want them to validate us. Who likes it if a friend says (of our jealousy or our covetousness or our bitterness or whatever that we been ‘sharing’ in ‘understandable’ terminology): “That’s a sin. You need to repent.”?

      I pray that Christians will rise up against the lies of this age and hold onto God’s Word. That means holding onto both TRUTH and GRACE. Love rejoices with the Truth.

      How wonderful to see former homosexuals share in these comments how God has delivered them. This is the truth. The love and power of God can deliver us and set us free from our sin!

    2. Mark says:

      Geez, Louise, “Joan of arghhh!!! Why would you even bother to put YOUR comments out here in the public sphere of “judges” and “strangers” on a letter you think should never have been put out into the public sphere of “judges” and “strangers”? I think you and Katy misunderstood the letter and it’s intent. What is wrong with posting something of one’s own free will that is thought-provoking and timely, and is not obscene or derogatory? And why respond if you object, other than to say: “This should not have been posted”? Adding your own comments immediately undermines your point.

      1. Katy says:

        I can’t speak for others but it is true that some of our discussions in these comments have been about related issues, not the exact content of the letter. In re-reading the original letter, I think I can see why it is easy to misunderstand her.
        1. Her opening paragraph, apart from the final three lines, unfortunately reads like a spiel from militant LBGTs. Is it really true that homosexuals are ‘everywhere’? I don’t think so. That is propaganda, as others have pointed out. Homosexuals want to believe they are ‘everywhere’. Mind you, they have been doing a very good job at promoting their cause and increasing in popularity in the past few decades.

        2. Her second paragraph is, also as others have pointed out, has an unfortunate critical tone toward other Christians and churches. In my life-long church experiences, I do not recall mentions of homosexuality to be followed by condemnation, hatred and jokes, although I’m sure it has happened in some places at times. I think that would be extremely rare. Actually I think that many Christians are realizing that we are under attack from the world and we are on our way to becoming a discriminated-against marginal group if we don’t rise up and make a stand.

        3. Her third paragraph is encouraging when she speaks the truth that the false PC churches who say homosexuality is not a sin give no hope at all. This is vital. But I’m not sure who she is addressing when she says “We must therefore accept your lying, your adultery, your lust, your idolatry, your addictions, YOUR sins. “ Is she talking to the PC ‘permissive’ churches or the ‘condemning’ churches?

        4. Her final paragraph is the most clear. All in all, I want to say to this sister, I pray for you and believe for God to continue His work in you until the day of Christ Jesus, as He is also working in me to help me to overcome the sin I struggle with.

        5. I agree with others who have pointed out that this sister ought not to identify herself as a lesbian, anymore than I should identify myself as Ungrateful, or Rebellious.

        1. Katy, this is a very good exposition, much better than mine. Thank you for it.

      2. Joan Of Argghh! says:

        Mark, the difficulty with pointing out hypocrisy is that, unless one happens to be Christ, the charge of hypocrisy is immediately recursive upon the one hurling it. I am not unaware of the challenge, but I’m up to it, having honed my sword of the Spirit on much harder stuff than the hurt feelings of a confused young lady… for whom I have much love, and for which reason I rebuke her in Truth, not in tandem with the latest outrage of victimology. However, seeing that the cat is out of the bag, so to speak, one must deal with the kittens it brings forth. Thus do I comment.

        It is a delicate challenge to speak of spiritual matters it amongst Christians whose theology is frightened out of good sense by atheists on Reddit, (but it doesn’t stop Christians from wasting hours there) and have acquired the sum of their spiritual discernment at a table in Starbucks. But if you will read my comments, all of them, you may have a question or two for me that I would be happy to answer.

    3. Lori says:

      Joan, thank you for your insightful thoughts on this thread. You have an amazing ability to get to the bottom lines of this issue, and I have gleaned muchnfrom your posts. I’m not surprised you’re getting flack because it’s not what some want to hear.

      1. Lori, I thank you for your kind words. I am humbly gratified to think just one person might be spurred onto further consideration that all that we read and experience is not all that there is at work within cultural difficulties.

  116. terri says:

    my daughter is a lesbian and feels God created her that way. She does not believe her life style is sinful. many of her friends feel the same way. So, how does one tackle that? She was brought up in a Christian Church, has been baptized (during highschool). She knows how I feel – which is different, but I continue to love her and invite her to church and love on her friends. I do not agree with her choices, but at this point, I feel it will only be God that will convict her that her lifestyle is a sin. I pray almost daily for that.

    1. Ken Godevenos says:

      Terri, I hear and feel your concern and perhaps your pain. I think that people (including some of us) have the idea that what God sanctions and what He does not sanction, depends on “our beliefs” (e.g. your daughter does not ‘believe’ her lifestyle is sinful) or on how “one feels” (e.g. she “feels” God created her that way). Those are legitimate feelings and beliefs — but that does not mean God is bound to support our beliefs and feelings. On this issue, He has spoken His thoughts and He does not change. You are right, if your daughter is to be convicted, it will have to be through the Holy Spirit speaking to her. The only thing a loving parent can do is a)continue to pray for her; and b) not give up — ever!

      God may or may not answer your prayer the way we think He should or when we think He should. He is in charge of you and your daughter and He loves you both very much — enough to have died for both of you. We must leave this major issue to Him. You have done your part; the rest is about ‘you’ as you pray and trust. God bless you, Terri.

  117. Mark says:

    The letter makes a very powerful and fundamental statement that seems to be getting ignored. The writer says she doesn’t want her sin to be compromised with, just as ALL other sins shouldn’t be compromised with. It’s like she’s laying down the gauntlet, church, but in a good way! Would homosexuality and other sins be so rampant today if Christians hadn’t abandoned their posts decades ago? Christians cuddled into their comfy “churches”, let the “riff-raff” know they weren’t welcome, and ignored the world around them. Now we are acting surprised that we are under attack and that the morals of this country have become almost non-existent. Where were Christians when public prayer was kicked out of school, when Roe v Wade was passed, when porn exploded as a right of “free speech”? Oh, we had some rare protestors, but why wasn’t the majority of Christians backing them up? We have a lot to answer for in the current predicaments we are facing. How long have we ignored adultery in our churches, and liars, manipulators, gossipers, thieves, wife beaters, child abusers and sexual predators, lovers of money, etc.? How long HAVE we been tolerating sin, looking the other way, especially when it came to protecting these FALSE church heirarchies and financial gain? The church as a whole in America has allowed all kinds of sin to flourish in our midst, and now we either want to draw the line at homosexuality as if it has nothing to do with all the other sin we’ve allowed, OR we want to “compromise” and twist the word of God and claim it is acceptable. If we are going to draw the line at homosexuality, it needs to be drawn in love, but drawn all the same, AND we need to start drawing the line at ALL sin, cleaning house of all the sin that has been corrupting the church for far too long, starting with OURSELVES! We don’t want to look at ourselves, do we? We want to make nice with the writer of this letter, let her and everyone else know that oh, we NEVER were the type of people SHE’S talking about-not us! We want to fall over ourselves still trying to prove how “nice” and “holy” WE are, when in reality we need to repent. The writer is not asking for us to make nice say a bunch of pretty words,and she makes that VERY clear! We need to repent, all of us. Remember church discipline? It’s spelled out in the Bible, and it was meant to PROTECT the church, and HELP those struggling with sin by letting them deal with the consequences of it-and if it brought them to repent of it they were to be forgiven and restored. As a church we have become so lazy, so self-centered, so concerned with money and fame that we are about to have OUR lampstand snuffed out. If any Christians out there remain who have Godly love in their hearts, follow ALL the word of God, not just what pleases you, and create church groups that reflect the safety and discipline that God provides instead of acting like yet another useless social agency that only helps people feel good about what is ruining their lives. Christians need to repent and grieve for neglecting God’s commands for so very long. Start meeting and praying to God in repentance, helping each other to become obedient. Meet in your homes, become individually responsible, not pew-warmers waiting for some paid church “leader” to tell you what to do. We are ALL responsible for knowing and obeying the word and helping each other in our walk, 24/7, not just on Sundays in some overpriced building. Start taking God seriously, because we are about to be overtaken by the world for our laziness.

  118. Seeking Wisdom says:

    Wow ! Reading through all these comments really conjures up in me the question of what exactly should be the response of the individual Christian, and the church. I personally know a few professing homosexuals, most of whom claim to be a Christian. A couple are not and refer to themselves as Agnostic/Theists. Yes, sin is sin, but what plumbline are we using to determine what is sin?
    The Scriptures speak plainly about those who lie, steal, gossip, practice homosexuality, etc. What is our response to realizing sin? Asking for forgiveness, and turning away from that sin. Not so easy all the time, but so necessary for us to be in a right relationship with our Lord and Saviour.
    I can choose any sin for this example, but what if society pushed for those who steal to be accepted “just as they are?” I so agree that the church needs to have a more loving approach to all people, no matter the sin and what society says is okay to make public. I, for one, do not care to know who is attracted to who of the same sex, anymore than I like the picture of one who goes about stealing. And, no, I don’t believe we should “accept” the thief as a thief, who continues to practice that behavior any more than we should accept the one who thrives on porn and professes to be a Christian. As Christians, we should “accept” the command of compassion and extend the love of Christ, yes and absolutely; but I for one, especially with the homosexuals I know who profess Christianity, do NOT at all believe that their attraction to the same gender is a sin, nor their actions to surrender to it.
    The author of this article professes to be a Christian, and admits to same sex attraction as being sinful, and professes a desire to change. My response to her would be to do all I could to help her in her request. Most homosexuals I have talked with don’t even go anywhere near wanting to change–they just want to be accepted as they are. My question to them is, “You want me to accept you in your sin, for what purpose?” To make you feel justified?” To give credence to your behavior?” Seriously, I would love to be able to view all homosexuals as wanting to change because they desire to be like Christ. I want to be like Christ. I want to put pride behind me. I want to stop having judgmental thoughts. I want to do any number of things that creep into my head at times. I’m always asking forgiveness from God. We all want to feel accepted, of course, but seeking acceptance from a fallen world pales in comparison to the One Who accepts us as we are, and continues His work of redemption. Oh how we all should hunger and thirst after righteousness…doing right, thinking right…being perfected by His work, and what is “right” defined by the Word of God, and not by us mere mortals who steer towards doing what is right in our own eyes.

    1. Katy says:

      Spot on. What makes me so sad that is there are ‘Christians’ today who are buying into the lie that homosexuals are ‘born that way’, etc. If we say that homosexuals ‘cannot help it’ we also must say that thieves and murderers and pedophiles cannot help it, and so why would we not then change the laws so THEY are not discriminated against? I would beg all Christians to be aware that the current militant agenda is only a beginning…I feel deep concern for future generations.

      In one way we all ‘cannot help’ sinning, because we all are born with a sin nature. The variety of sin we struggle with will be influenced by our particular personal weakness, stemming from our personality and the quality of our childhood experiences. All sin is a grievous struggle to true believers. Homosexuality is particularly a very strong, deeply-rooted addiction that will usually trace back to early childhood, but God’s power is greater!

      Having said that, you may be aware that because of the permission-giving of our current society, there are young (and older!) people today who are experimenting with homosexual relationships not so much because they have felt attracted to the same sex since early childhood, but because they have been exposed to gratuitous information and lustful media experiences, and they have been brainwashed to believe it is cool! The militant agenda (and there is no doubt there is one) has been deliberately targeting young people for years now.

      We must proclaim the truth that ALL sin is a deviation from God’s beautiful, intentional design, and we must love and help one another to wholeheartedly pursue deliverance and restoration. This is the work of God’s church, His body.

      1. John Gordon says:

        So you don’t believe that gays wren’t “born that way?” Okay, if we choose our sexuality, then at what point did you choose yours? You say, “but I was always heterosexual.” Exactly. You don’t get to have it both ways. Either you agree that you CHOSE your attraction, or you maintain that you have always felt that way, AKA “born with it.”
        I mean, be logical. Do you really believe that millions of people, both now and tthroughout history, were born hetero, but somehow not only had the insane ability to change their attraction to same-sex, but they chose to identify as gay, meaning that they (until very recently) were in jeapordy of prison, much less being outcast from society and their friends, families and church? You REALLY think millions chose this life?
        It’s fairly obvious that you really haven’t thought this through.
        Secondly, I’m still waiting for someone to show me where Jesus said homosexuality was wrong. If all you can do is point to a few verses in Leviticus to back up your bigotry, then you are under the ceremonial law which was specifically for the Hebrew nation, and you must therefore observe the entire law, like not touching women on their period, never touching a football, never wearing a blended fabric shirt, and so on anmd so on…

        1. Katy says:

          please don’t presume to know the history of my sexuality. If you really want to know the truth, I will tell you that I went through an awful time of confusion when I was a young girl (pre-pubescent). I felt attracted to other women and it was a distressing time for me. I did not want to feel that way. I thank God that I was able to be comforted according to the Bible by a loving Christian mother and prayed for by my church. They gave me love and a constant assumption of Truth: That male and female are designed for each other.

          I later understood that it had a lot to do with the fact that I had been a victim of an incident of sexual abuse (by a stranger) when I had been about three years old and later had been exposed to some pornography in a magazine store, plus some other family issues. “The enemy roars about like a lion, seeking whom he may devour.”

          This time of confusion lifted as I prayed and washed myself in God’s Word. I am so thankful that I did not encounter any LGBT propaganda designed to harvest young souls such as myself.

          I can very well understand how children who are not parented with great wisdom can be susceptible to this trap. There is a time for many children when they are drawn to the same sex. It is often a very normal part of their identity progression as they work out WHO THEY ARE and who they are going to become. Certain personalities and childhood circumstances (I am not saying all homosexuals were abused) contribute. Plus some of them may have hormonal imbalances also.

          I do not think that all homosexuals choose their same-sex attraction any more than I believe that all alcoholics would choose their misery. If you had any idea of the compassion I feel for little children who are confused about their sexuality! I weep for them. I long to take them and guide them into truth and freedom.

          I share these things mostly to encourage struggling or enquiring homosexuals that THERE IS HOPE FOR FREEDOM! It is not a life-sentence.

      2. Lori says:

        Being “born that way,” does not mean they cant help their behavior. they really are two separate things. Having been brought up with a gay brother, and now having a son who is also gay, I can tell you, they demonstrated clearly their “gayness” from the time they were very small children, their interests and mannerisms reflected this before they were even old enough to understand what they were doing. That being said, just because they were born gay doesn’t mean they are unable to resist those behaviors and lifestyle. There are gay people who are Christians, and firmly believe homoesexual behavior is forbidden in scripture. And in the same way a young man who never finds the right female mate must avoid temptation around women so as to avoid sexual sin, or a man who is tempted to cheat on his wife every time he sees a woman on the street, the Christian believer who is gay must resist sin and avoid situations that my tempt him/her.

    2. Mark says:

      Yes, “seeking wisdom”-if we use our response as Biblical Christians to homosexuality and apply that to ALL our sin, then it begins to make sense. The letter writer hit the nail on the head: anyone calling themselves a Christian who wants homosexuality accepted is not thinking of compassion or love at all-they are thinking ONLY of how to get THEIR sins “accetped”, too. Accepting any sin is actually selfish, there’s no love in it at all, whether its our own sin or someone else’s. And its not our job to chase sinners down to get them to repent-we’re to let them go their way and respect their free will as God respects ours. If they come to repentance then they are welcomed back and restored; if not we still love and pray for them but there is no chance for relationship. “Unless two are agreed, how can they walk together?” It is VERY interesting how gays literally crave acceptance from the church. If they believe in their righteousness so surely, then what do they care if we accept their lifestyle or not? They can and have created their own parallel society, complete with all the amenities, including gay churches, major media fanfare, and special treatment by the law. And yet they are STILL not happy and many have vicious feelings toward Christians. That says volumes about the doubt they harbor, and about who they allow to hold sway over them-Satan-who wants nothing more than to try and destroy anything of God. They may not be aware of this, but that is what is happening. So do we “accept” this? Not unless we want to court our own destruction, and hasn’t the church been doing enough of that? Haven’t we learned a lesson from selling out to the world and trying to be liked? Jesus did not try to be liked-He remained obedient to His Father, even unto death. And we get uncomfortable if someone doesn’t like us!!!

    3. kim says:

      Can you say, Bingo?? You are so right. I can’t justify something God has called me not to justify, but I sure will love the dickens out of you. I think also we’ve been ‘trained’ to accept other sins and turn a blind eye but not homosexuality. It seems each 10 years a new ‘in sin’ comes in and we all rally around it, screaming about it, then move onto something different instead of doing what God has called us to do.

      1. Patrick Duncan says:

        If we see a movement within Christianity that says, “Greed is good! Embrace your greed!” or “is gluttony really bad? stop worrying about overeating- God gave us food to enjoy!”, then I’ll agree with you. But there isn’t much to compare with this movement that now outright rejects both Old and New Testament teaching. Yes, it is true that Christians do TEND to turn a blind eye to certain things, (like gluttony or laziness or fornication), but it is also true that homosexuality is listed with some other sinful patterns and habits that are dangerous to one’s soul, like being a chronic deceiver or thief (see I Cor. 6).

        But even if many Christians are hypocritical, it does not mean that we should lower our standards. It should be a wake up call to re-affirm Biblical standards. One of those standards is in Ephesians 5: “among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality”. We need to return to this standard, which is a very high but very Biblical standard.

        1. kim says:

          Well, I don’t seem to have said, lower the standards, Patrick. But thanks anyway. And I think you may not have an understanding of how powerful God’s love is to a dying world. Moving through Christ’s love is like a beacon to the world, This is why Jesus talked about us being a light to the world. Jesus said, they will know you by your love. My job is not to change the homosexual before they get saved, Just lead to the Lord and then do what HE says, not what I think I should do. So I stand by my post. Have a great day. :)

          1. Patrick Duncan says:

            Well you may not be saying it Kim, but a lot of people are saying that and your comments do suggest that we adopt a laissez faire approach. The trend lately has been to bring up things in the Old Testament that we don’t “obey” any more, like not eating shellfish. The argument is that since we now are enlightened enough to eat shellfish and other foods prohibited in the Old Testament, we should feel liberated in sexual ethics as well.

  119. kim says:

    Dear, I think you are absolutely right. You do need love and guidance from your church family and from the children of God. Not judgement and hate. But please don’t ask me to approve of your lifestyle, b/c God’s word says I can’t, just as I can’t approve of the man and woman living together unmarried or a person who continually gossips despite being told to stop. You must also realize that I can’t approve of something God has commanded me not to approve as I answer to Him and Him only, not to society. But you are right, we, Christ-followers, need to love you and support you. And I do love you as a sister in the Lord and will support you, let you cry on my shoulder, I’ll pray with you, but will also give you guidance and love as I do all my family in Christ. I’ll accept you as a new creation in Christ Jesus, but I have to as Paul said, gently help you onto God’s road as we are His creations created in Christ Jesus. I will do all I can to help you walk in God’s holiness. I’ll help you, support you, pray with you, cry with you, but I can’t just simply accept something God has told me not to, then get angry b/c I won’t. I care deeply for the homosexual community and HATE it when they are slammed and mocked, the nonsense hate that runs around. I often show extra love to the homosexual community b/c I know hate is all they get. But please don’t ask me to approve of it, as I just can’t, but boy do I love you all. And I’m really sorry, but homosexual guys are kinda like my babies. I love each and everyone of them and long to just fuss over them. But I still love my lesbian sisters, but I like to fuss over the guys. They’re just ‘fussably cute’.

  120. gruesser says:

    Thank you, sister in Christ!

  121. Sean says:

    One question that has always been on my mind is what does it look like for a homosexual to pursue godliness?

    1. Amber says:

      To answer your question, “What does it look like for a homosexual to pursue godliness?”:

      1. From experience, to replace lies with the truth about ourselves. Most of my struggle began with comments and looks made to me as a child. Like Satan made Eve doubt God’s Word in the very beginning, comments from other’s perception of me made me question my role as a female. I then proceeded to question who I was as it related to other people, male and female. All those lies were seeds of deception, and one day they sprouted. Thanks be to God, His truth about who I am is growing stronger than the lies that still linger from time to time. Its been 8 years now since he saved me from such a lifestyle. And everyday I have a choice to choose the lies and what’s easier, or to choose Truth and ask God for help in believing it on a greater level than the day before. His truth is reigning!!

      2. Prayer, prayer… prayer! If you don’t have people praying for you and supporting you in that way, you’re gonna fail. But, prayer from others brings with it vulnerability with others WILLING to bear the burden with you and hold you accountable in times of temptation. I confess most people in the church are scared to do so. Such gems within the body of Christ often are few and far between. However, an earnest seeker of the Lord must trust that He will deliver the help one needs to overcome Satan and his destructive tactics; God is faithful and cannot deny Himself.

      Those are, from my perspective, a couple of the key aspects for a homosexual to pursue true godliness, which incorporates obedience in action and belief of the Truth mentally. It is more complex from person to person, but these are the foundation. Interestingly, it incorporates the very Person of Jesus: grace (from the body and the Father) and truth (Jesus). God knew what He was doing when He inspired John to write, ‘And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth.'”

      To God be the glory, now and forever, and in ALL things!

  122. Abbi says:

    Awesome and convivting! Praise God for your honesty!

  123. daryl ford says:

    (1) Fornicators shall not inherit the kingdom of God. This term refers to those who engage in sexual activity which God has declared sinful. He has not declared all sexual activity. In fact, He condones and even encourages lawful sexual activity according to His design and purpose (I CORINTHIANS 7:2-4; HEBREWS 13:4). Fornication refers to sexual activity outside of the marriage relationship between a man and a woman. It would include premarital as well as extramarital sexual relationships of whatever duration from a one night stand to an ongoing affair. Such activity was rampant in first century Corinth. It is rampant today in our own society. But it matters not how commonly it is practiced, it is still unrighteous and it will keep one from entering heaven.
    (2) Idolaters shall not inherit the kingdom of God. Those who offer to others what belongs unto God are idolaters. A person’s idol might be a huge, grotesque image carved out of stone before which he bows. Or it might be his own desires. It is anything that a person adores more than God. Idolatry will keep one from entering heaven.
    (3) Adulterers shall not inherit the kingdom of God. Adultery seems to be more specific a term than fornication. It is usually limited to sexual unfaithfulness to a marriage partner. Adultery will keep one from entering heaven.
    (4) The effeminate shall not enter the kingdom of God. When we see this word, we think of a sissy. But the word goes beyond that. It refers to one who is soft, specifically, to the passive partner in a homosexual relationship. Being effeminate will keep one from entering heaven.
    (5) Homosexuals shall not enter the kingdom of God. This word is used twice in the New Testament; in the text we are examining as well as I TIMOTHY 1:10. It denotes one who would take the leading role in a homosexual relationship. It is not fashionable today to suggest that such activity is unrighteous and will keep one out of the kingdom of God, but that is what the Covenant of Jesus Christ says. Practicing homosexuality will keep one from entering heaven.
    (6) Thieves shall not enter the kingdom of God. There is no excuse for taking that which rightfully belongs to another. Whether its shoplifting, pilfering, short-changing or armed robbery, fraud and extortion, it is thievery. Whether the person doing the stealing is rich or poor it will still keep one from entering heaven.
    (7). The covetous will not enter the kingdom of God. This has to do with having an uncontrollable desire to possess a certain thing. It motivates one into committing sin in order to satisfy greed. Coveting that which belongs to another will keep one from entering heaven.
    (8) Drunkards shall not inherit the kingdom of God. Children of God have no need to cloud their perspectives nor dull their senses. We must be able to think and reason clearly. Drunkenness causes one to lose focus and rationality. Those who give themselves over to intoxication will find that it keeps them from entering heaven.
    (9) Revilers shall not inherit the kingdom of God. There are many to speak boldly about things that they know little about. Many men and women of God have had to endure reproach for their faith. Not even the Son of God escaped verbal abuse. But they will not have to endure it forever because there will be no revilers in heaven.
    (10) Swindlers shall not inherit the kingdom of God. Seducers and smooth talkers of all kinds are included here. The religious con-man belongs to this group as well as the secular. Those who prey on others by trying to take advantage of their misfortune would also be included. Swindlers cannot take their ill-gotten goods with them when they leave this world, nor will they enter heaven.


  124. Brian Leslie Coatney says:

    Thank you for your sincere letter. You hit at the heart of all problems: self-righteousness. I take from the Bible that God created us to be vessels, branches, and temples. That means that our primary role is to receive life from Him, not live life with His help. He is our life. I also know that any Christian can commit any sin. Hardly anyone I meet believes this. Yes, every single person can become enslaved by any sin. It’s a shock to see. That means that if I am to be kept from sin, Christ must be my keeper. The other thing I see is that our identity is a spirit one, not based on emotions or bodily urges. What happens is that we have desires and take them as an identity. But our identity is not based at all on the outer person but on the inner person. This leads to seeing that a Christian really is a supernaturally birthed and kept person. God becomes the governor of our sexuality and defines it. We practice this same truth in many areas of our lives when we have to break old ideas of who we are. We have a family member who has been into homosexuality for decades. We believe the day is coming when he will see who his keeper is and what his true identity is. We do what I think you are saying: we hold the line on biblical truth but love him. Brian

  125. connie says:

    Wekk said. God Bless & give you strenght.

  126. Just sain says:

    When we read about Sodom & Gomorra we read that God destroyed it because of the unnatural acts that were being practice there, such as men with men or women with women or men & women have relations animals and so on.

  127. Amber says:

    As someone who has been on the other side of the fence, I concur with the writer of this letter. I will continue to reach out with support for ANY who chooses Jesus over their sin. Bring on your burdens and your difficulties: by God’s grace and strength, may we bear the burden of being human together.

  128. S. R. says:

    The Wisdom of God is foolishness to the world. And the Wisdom of the World is foolishness to God. I for one would rather er on the side of God’s Wisdom. We will run into those who want to help us gratify what we know isn’t Christ within, to make us feel better and more comfortable with how we naturally feel. And we will also run into those who have to point out the specs in our eyes when they have logs for their own. You have truth in you, don’t let it go. Keeping showing others around you, and they will see what Jesus has taught you. Through this letter you are a light on a hill showing who Jesus is and drawing others nearer. I have no doubt you will be a sister for which we hear “Well done, good and faithful servant.” Keep running your race!

  129. Sisters in Christ says:

    Truly spoken! Compromising the Holy Scripture is not an option to living in the Holy Spirit. The blood of Jesus covers all sin! and His grace is sufficient to bring us through to who we are in Christ Jesus! You are precious beloved!

  130. anne-marie says:

    I am blessed by your article in that you seem to be a person who accepts the Word of God and is not trying to change the world to accept your sin. I have had the opposite experience from the gay and lesbians that I have known and I have known many. In general I have found a group of people who want the world to view their lifestyle as normal and acceptable and who try force acceptance through political lobbying and other methods. I see people who want to remove the rights of anyone who does not agree with their lifestyle ie Christians. I love all people and try not to see them through the eyes of sin. None of us are perfect and I hope that people do not see me as my sin either. God bless you for your article and continue to seek the Lord as He would have you.

  131. Anne says:

    I am almost afraid to post a comment after reading over all these others, many of which are filled with frustration and irritation at one another. But one thing keeps coming to mind over and over…when we consider all these various sins mentioned – adultery, drunkenness, pornography, homosexuality, slander – most people in principle, will confess that one is not “worse” than the other. My pastor has always preached to our congregation (and I see a pattern of this in Scripture) that there is only one sin that is greater, and that finally condemns man – and that is the sin of unrepentance. A practical example of this might be when a husband/father, who is a member of his church, is involved in years of ongoing pornography – during which he may have had seasons where it was subdued, only to resurface. A church is spiritually responsible to come alongside that man, call him to repentance and restoration, and then to encourage him in faithful fruits of righteousness.

    There are many details to this woman’s story which we cannot possibly know just by reading this letter – is she physically acting on her homosexual desires? Is she engaging in relationships with other women? Is she an active member in her church, or an “attender”? Publishing such a letter in an open forum without any direction or “teaching” as to how we should interpret it is a bit disappointing. It leaves so much to individual interpretation, and that brings me to the critical fact that is often overlooked when we get busy reading and posting on blogs – the believer who is committed to a covenant community – the local church – must be involved in careful examination and counsel within the protective bounds of that body. This is where we are safest and where we can experience the most direct fruits of sanctification. Homosexuality is not a worse sin than others, but there are a number of sins which may have varying implications and consequences. Many of those things cannot be hammered out here, but in the wise and loving boundaries of the local church.

    Yes, it is always helpful to be reminded of the call to compassion, gracious words and a kind heart when we deal with those in our congregations who may be involved deeply in a specific sin. However, it seems a bit irresponsible to sit here and debate how that should look in a church when we don’t know this individual woman nor her particular church and its leadership. It appears as if the result is merely stirring up more tension between “brothers and sisters”. I am saddened by many of the comments here, and I am even more thankful when I consider the gracious hand of God in placing me in a covenant community where His WORD is prominent, Christ is exalted, and the leadership is eager to lovingly encourage our people to walk in His ways by mutual fellowship and accountability. I pray that is the type of place this woman and others in her situation will find themselves.

    1. Anne says:

      Just in case it needs clarified – when I mentioned the example of a husband/father involved in pornography, I meant that if he continued without any repentance and recognition that this was sinful and needed to be dealt with in his life, then that may point to an overall unrepentance, which would be indicative of a lost person. A true believer seeks repentance, and it is important to remember that this term “repent” means to “turn from”. That doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s gone forever and there’s no inner turmoil as one may still face the temptation from time to time, but turning from something would definitely mean pressing forward in faith away from that sin. Similarly, a homosexual who is truly repentant would desire to turn from that life and would show fruits of doing so – i.e. no longer living with or being intimate with partner(s), seeking to replace unbiblical thoughts with those that are pure. This may mean a period of celibacy or even lifelong celibacy, depending on the individual’s particular growth in this area. But again, I cannot stress enough, this is where the wise and loving counsel of the pastor(s) or other trusted spiritual authorities would be pivotal, as well as prayerful and compassionate friends within the church.

  132. Tracy says:

    I am a Christian & I think this is an outstanding article. I would consider myself tolerant but this article got me thinking. Would I, in fact, invite you to the well? Usually the things that are written, from ‘either side’ and negative and teeter on the lines of anger and hatred. It is great to read an article expressing something in a more respectful and thought provoking way.

    This issue will be a battle until the very last day… ALL of our sins will be.

    Thank you for sharing

  133. MC62 says:

    There are a couple of fundamental assumptions in the letter that need to be challenged:First of all the response of churches. I am not sure of the churches to which she refers, but I personally do not know of any churches I fellowship with that are guilty of her ecclesiastical stereotype. Secondly is her fatal assumption that she is lesbian if she is in Christ–“and such WERE some of you”. If she is truly in Christ, though she might struggle with her lesbian past and desires, her identity is in Christ if she has been justified by grace through faith alone. Certainly her penultimate paragraph is commendable. In the end, the response of the true church to this continental divide issue should always be one of an equal measure of truth and grace if we are to imitate a Christ-like response.

  134. consta says:

    you can come to me…i have no issues with people like you))) i am a sinner too, so why should i be ignorant to those that have the same desire inside their hearts as i have and as you have aswell, to be like Christ Jesus?? The real church should be as a body, if the hand has problems, we must take care about it, if the leg is in need, we have to take care about it…etc. Isn’t so?

  135. Seeking Wisdom says:

    We all need to keep in mind that the author of this article is stating her views; therefore “open letter” is her openness and not necessarily the view of other professing homosexuals. It concerns me that she remains with the label she has given herself. The God I know, and trust has told me that, when He forgives me, He removes my sin as far as the east is from the west…remembering them no more. (Psalm 103:12) Romans 6:1 (Holman)tells us, “What should we say then? Should we continue in sin so that grace may multiply?” The worldview today (which is nothing new since the fall of mankind)is pure deception. Get in the Word and abide there; the Holy Spirit will speak very clearly to each of us whether it be for this particular sin, or for another.

  136. Mr. Taylor,

    Your blog was sincere but unwise. You wrote to briefly about a topic that requires great care. If the issue of homosexuality in the Church was that simple, than it would not be such an issue. Below is a link to my response to you sir. I wish you blessings in Christ.

    Samuel Ketcham
    Columbus, GA

    1. kim says:

      Um . . . this letter was taken from another blog and they found it somewhere. Justin didn’t write it. Apparently a lesbian did write it.

  137. The most sincerest thought on this issue ever. God bless us all.

  138. Mr. Taylor, can you describe how this letter came into your possession? Or, as Samuel Ketcham avers, did you write it yourself?

    1. Justin Taylor says:

      I didn’t write it and would say if I did. It is from a woman who goes to the same church as Hunter Baker. He has verified its authenticity. It was on his blog first and I reprinted it.

      1. Joan of Argghh! says:

        The “reprinted by” instead of “from” was confusing to me, as well. In the light of a doubt cast, it wasn’t easy to ascertain. Thank you for the clarification.

  139. Luis says:

    To a sister in Christ: First, you try to make it sound like homosexuals constitute more than the 1%, and I´ve also heard up to 5%, of the population than has been established by scientific investigation. And, of course, homosexuals need to do this–it is not convenient to be such a small percentage of the population because that shows that their behavior, the misguided attempts to imitate normal people, is indeed aberrational.

    Next, sister in Christ, Christianity does call for us to accept you as a sister in Christ, and if you had never identified yourself to us, we would not have ever known that you were homosexual. One can say the same thing about my situation: You accept me as a brother in Christ, if I don´t identify my sins to you, you don´t know about them, hunky dory. But that is not the way homosexuals operate: In their need to be normal, or at least similar to normal people, they imitate normal people in our intimacy, but homosexuals are sterile, so babies are not produced–only disease, mental problems, suicide, early death.

    So, the best thing is for me to be discreet, to keep my sins between myself and my priest–and God, of course, and you be discreet and keep your sins to yourself. If you do not consider your homosexual acts and general behavior to be sinful, then really we are both wasting our time. But there cannot be any doubt that the human genitals were made for complementary use, for mutuality, and any other use, there cannot be any doubt, is abnormal.

  140. Jonathan says:

    The fact that we, as Christians, are referring to those who stuggle with homosexual sin as “homosexuals” and “lesbians” is a huge problem. If you are in Christ, THAT is your identity. There is no such thing as a homosexual Christian or a lesbian Christian, just as there is no such thing is a lying Christian or an adulterous Christian. We are Christians. We are IN CHRIST. THAT is our identity. That isn’t to take away from the fact that there are Christians out there who struggle immensely with homosexual sin, just as there are Christians who struggle with adultery, fornication, lying, and stealing. But by identifying those who struggle with homosexual sin in the same way that our culture does (referring to them as “homosexuals”), we are simply affirming that this is a part of their identity, when it is, in fact, not. We have the ability to conquer our sin through Christ! So why do we still cling to a sinful identity by referring to ourselves as “homosexual Christians?” It doesn’t make sense, and a lot of believers are missing the root issue of this topic by the way we speak about this subject. Homosexual sin, like any other sin, is an abomination to our Lord. Why would we group that with the name of Christ? Let’s rethink this one, brothers and sisters.

    1. Matt says:

      first of all, the word “homosexual” does not refer to a sin. it refers to a TEMPTATION.

      Some respond to that temptation by giving in. Others respond to it by stranding firm.

      But either way, it is incredibly obnoxious and very much unChristian, in fact demonic, to tell a person their temptation is a sin.

      And frankly, the Church today need a swift and hard kick in the pants for not only labeling a temptation as a sin but for then considering it a worse sin than any other.

      This is even worse than what the Pharisees did. At least the tax collectors and prostitutes they condemned had actually DONE something wrong. We condemn 12 and 13 year old kids for facing temptation.

      And let us recall that the Pharisees were the ONLY group Christ actually directly threatened with hell.

      It is no wonder the Church and our nation are in the state they are when Christian act in such an unbelieving, unrepentant and crude manner.

      the letter was well written. many of the responses to it – not so much.

      1. John Gordon says:

        I am mostly on the same page as you sir, and I think your intentions are right on. However, “homosexuality” is not a temptation or a sin. It is simply a word to describe one’s same-sex attraction. In the same way that “heterosexuality” has nothing to do with action – good or bad. It’s simply a word we use to define an attraction that is different than heterosexual. But I think you and I are not far apart in this area.
        Secondly, after asking at least three times (I think) I’ve yet to hear from anyone who can tell me where Jesus said anything about homosexuality, much less condemned someone for their attraction. I realize that Paul referred to a specific group of people who were clearly heterosexuals TRYING to trade their sexuality and act differently than God created them. But that has as much to do with modern monogamous, Christian homosexual marriages as rape has to do with heterosexuality. It’s just bad and biased workmanship to claim that Jesus or God, or even Paul described what is happening today as “sin” of any kind.

        1. Andy Pratt says:

          HI John
          In my opinion (from personal experience too) desire and attraction are not sin, they are fall in the ‘lusting in one’s heart’, ‘struggle against sin’, ‘fighting the good fight’ area. But carrying out our desires is sin, it is adultery fornication etc. A same-sex desire pattern is a deep thing that can be healed. We are weak and wounded and it is a great help to have the right kind of fellowship as well. ‘It is the kindness of the Lord that leads you to repentance.’ True obedience is holding nothing back, giving Jesus all, and He can, indeed, change a person’s desires. Endless public discussion will change little. The point is, do we want to change, do we want to obey, and I am nobody’s Judge – we are all welcome in the miraculous healing presence of Jesus blessings


          1. John Gordon says:

            I understand what you are saying. However, I ask again – where does this assumption that “homosexuality” (the desire or activity) is a sin of some kind come from? Not from Jesus. Not from Paul. Not even from Leviticus as you would find out if you spent 5 minutes with a Jewish rabbi and asked him to interpret Leviticus 18:22.
            If we are telling many, many thousands of people that who they fundementally are sexually speaking is a sin, we better be damn certain that we know this for sure, no questions or gray areas about it.
            Sigh….so many people today who call themselves followers of Christ, yet they hate things He never even mentioned, and ignore or support the things (war, violence, etc) that He spoke so clearly about.

            1. johnny b says:

              I feel it’s in our conscience that we know it is a sin. It’s written on all our hearts. Jesus said that someone who looks at another with lust has already committed adultery with them in their hearts. Mt.5:28
              Acting upon homosexual desires is a sin because it’s adultery. You are not married. It’s obvious you cannot procreate with a same sex act, thus it’s obvious in our hearts that this can’t be a true marriage.

              1. John Gordon says:

                Interesting, but I think most people, including Jesus, would define “adultery” as a sexual relationship that breaks either both or one of the participants marriage vows. Sex outside of marriage is usually called fornication. Regardless of the sexuality of the participants. Lust can and does occur to everyone. You can’t really change the terms that most people (and the dictionary) assume. Otherwise “white” could mean “beige” and “2+2″ could equal “93.56.”
                Secondly, if “procreation” is what defines a “true” marriage, there are an awful lot of barren men and women, and older people who got married who are going to be pretty surprised to learn that they are living in sin. That obviously is a false equivalency as well.
                Thirdly, we can look at our conscience, or I prefer the Holy Spirit, to guide us individually. But only in individual things, like if we choose to smoke, or drink, or gamble, or play cards, or wear certain clothes, or date certain people, or listen to certain music. Personal things that are NOT mandatory or the same for all believers. We are cautioned against telling other people what they can and can’t do in areas that Scripture does not speak to, and while we can advise, we certainly don’t want to start mandating personal boundaries or taste as doctrine. Otherwise, we must look to ther Scriptures.

            2. kim says:

              Lev 18:22 in the original Hebrew says: Thou shalt not lie 7901(1) to lie, lie down, lie on
              2) to lodge
              3) to lie (of sexual relations)
              4) to lie down (in death)
              5) to rest, relax (fig)
              b) (Niphal) to be lain with (sexually)
              c) (Pual) to be lain with (sexually)
              d) (Hiphil) to make to lie down
              e) (Hophal) to be laid) with mankind 2145, as with 4904 womankind 802: it [is] abomination 8441. You can’t twist the word of God to mean what you want it to mean in order to adjust it to your agenda. I can’t believe that ANY priest would say the above is a ‘wrong’ translation. Then what it is suppose to mean? Thou shall not what with a man as with a woman? Dance? Flip burgers? Obviously the verb means to Have Sex!! Period.

              1. kim says:

                Let me say one more thing, John. You claim you have such knowledge of scripture yet you have no idea what it says or what it means. You make things up, twist the word and do whatever you have to do to make the scriptures fit your agenda. Paul said, cursed is anyone who does what you do. You claim to know Christ, yet how can you know Him when you have no idea what His word says? Again, where did this hippy love gospel sneak into the church?

      2. Jonathan says:

        Matt, homosexual behavior IS sin. That is what I was addressing in my comment. Yes, there is homosexual temptation that is NOT sin, but homosexual acts are most certainly sin.

        Has anyone here read the first chapter of Romans? What do you mean Paul never mentions homosexual behavior as a sin?

        1. Derek says:

          Jonathan, there are all kinds of weird theories that comes out from pro-gay theology, pertaining to Romans 1 and I Corinthians 6. They argue that Paul used terms that would have been understood by his audience to refer to temple prostitutes and/or promiscuous individuals, not all homosexuals. But their theories are undermined by the fact that even most liberal theologians recognize that these theories are balderdash and wishful thinking.

    2. kim says:

      Johnathon, I think you have a point. A struggling christian shouldn’t be refereed to as a struggling Christian. You have a gret point. It’s like sending curses out to that person. I think it’s time the church takes a restand on christians struggling with homosexuality. Instead of turning our backs on them, we need to see them as christians who struggle with porn. Us sisters need to surround our sister in the Lord instead of shunning her as the brothers need to surround the struggling man. Good points!!

  141. Andy Pratt says:

    Hi sister
    The Bible teaches I think that we are all open and naked before God and stand and fall before Him alone. It really shouldn’t matter to you what other Christians say and do. May you be healed, you are surely welcome in the Presence of Jesus

  142. Ignore All but the Holy Spirit and please God By Faith thru Grace & Keep Your Peace who are we to say when u have a direct line to God thru Jesus. These Obvious sins can not be measured against others hidden ones. the bible say’s we should not judge ourselves by ourselves. Thanks for writing this. My daughter Prefers women but it does not define her. As Jesus is so are we, As a man thinks so he is. wouldn’t it be nice of our minds were renewed overnight like on TV. So I am not perfect yet but Jesus in me is so im not giving up on him and my hope is only true when it is in Jesus Alone. Thanks for listening my daughter has no need of me what you wrote I would like to send to her but she can’t stand the mention of the word God. so ill hang on to it

    1. Anne says:

      While I understand your point and believe the best intentions about it – we should not counsel someone to “ignore all but the Holy Spirit”. Scripture is replete with examples of how other believers in our covenant community, including pastors, friends and teachers, are an important part of the sanctification process. We should be open and desirous to hear their input, filtering it through Scripture, and then addressing what is appropriate in biblical standards and leaving by the wayside that which is not. Clearly we will never agree with or please everyone, but there is a biblical weight that should be given to our local fellowship of believers and its leadership. We would be unwise to ignore their observations and counsel upon our lives.

      And although we must be extremely careful in how we apply and express it, the Bible does say we are to “judge” those within the household of faith. Of course we don’t judge them according to ourselves, but according to the bounds of Scripture. I am hesitant to go here, but I trust it will be read thoughtfully and considered before a rash response ensues – I Corinthians 5 talks about judging those within the body. Now clearly, if this woman is a believer striving to please the Lord and to forsake her sin, we are not to “put her out of the church”, so I am not calling for this type of reaction to her, but I am trying to keep us in line with Scripture, which does call for the body to “judge” one another so to speak. This can mean something as simple as if I am consistently observed gossiping, then it is the loving obligation of those in my local body to confront me (in love) and to call me to repentance and to turn from that sin. If I carry on over and over in that sin, refusing to repent, then the church must continue to confront me and work through the appropriate process of church discipline. Again, I am NOT necessarily saying this specific woman must be dealt with in just this way because we don’t know all of the details of her situation, and it seems by her letter that she does recognize her sin and desires to please the Lord. Just clarifying that the body does have a responsibility to address sin within its members and so we must be very careful to not make sweeping generalizations such as “ignore all but the Holy Spirit” and “do not judge”, which is what many of the comments on here are saying.

  143. Eugene says:

    This letter is obviously fake. No really existing gay person would write such a self-hating, self-demeaning stuff, as the second-to-last paragraph contains. It is evidently written by a straight male minister and was thoroughly edited and vetted before being published. I’m yet to decide if the author is well-meaning and is awkwardly trying to contain the runaway gay-hatred (which is rampant among this resource’s audience, as even the comments demonstrate) and the resulting PR disaster of the Gospel Coalition overall, or it is just another clumsy attempt to sneak some good-ol’ condemnation of “gay lifestyle” and the “sin of homosexuality” in “letter” designed to look like a pity plea from a schizophrenic person who calls herself anonymous closeted lesbian who lives in fear of outing, who asks for pity and equal treatment when it comes to condemning sins, and yet calls her sexual orientation (!!! not even “lifestyle”, by orientation!!!) a “sin” and applies to self and those who would want to help her some of the most damning Bible texts. It is like a letter from a secretly black person (say, 1/16 of black) in Luisiana 100 years ago to local whites, asking them to stop lynching blacks, and yet begging not to abolish segregation. So, yeah, I tend to think this is the latter. I.e. this “letter” is a shameful fake, preaching the same fire-and-brimstone condemnation while hiding behind the identity of a “lesbian” Neo Reformed girl. Shame on you who wrote it! I hope your ability to dupe and to preach hate and to discredit the Gospel will progressively diminish!

  144. Catalin says:

    At least we recognize our sin….. Ok what you do next? because in the bible said like that “recognize your sin and REPENT turn back from your SIN and turn your face to the Lord ” that you have to do not just judge the Church this is a replay to that girl from that open letter to the Church I am not Judge anyone, but things have to say to understand those people that God is not agree with this is a Sin and they have to realise is against to God , God Bless that Lady

  145. Andrew Boone says:

    Only one problem with the above: There are those of us, even amongst heterosexuals like myself, who do not believe it is a sin to be homosexual in the first place. I realize the Bible says otherwise, and I respect the Bible, but if our morals are determined by text in a book and not by our own minds and hearts, then something has gone terribly wrong. Not to mention the fact that the latter portion of the book in question — the portion that defines Christianity and separates it from Judaism — preaches the acceptance of all men, in direction contradiction to its earlier stance on the issue. This is only one of hundreds of such contradictions in the Bible, which should not be surprising for a book that, in itself, is composed of 73 separate books. This does not invalidate the Bible, and it certainly does mean that there isn’t truth to be found in it, but it does mean that we must decide what is right and wrong for ourselves. A book can not do that for us; it can only be a tool that we may use to guide us through this process. And the Bible is a magnificent tool at that, but the Bible itself preaches that homosexuality should be accepted and that it should not be accepted — it preaches both simultaneously. We can not believe both of these teachings; we choose which one to accept and which to reject. So even when we use the Bible to define our morality, we are still deciding for ourselves what to believe. The fact that our society has indoctrinated the anti-homosexual minset into its individuals so heavily that even some homosexuals, like the one above, have accepted their own nature as sinful — that, to me, is a truly sad reality. We are so quick to judge one another. What do I know of what it is to be gay? I know nothing of this, yet I feel justified in judging those who do? That is nonsensical. The nature of wrongdoing is fundamentally defined by those actions that harm the people with whom we share this world. I’ve never found a single example of homosexuality itself directly harming the individuals surrounding the homosexual. As such, I absolutely refuse to call it wrong, and as it not wrong, I will not ever judge an individual who possesses that characteristic. It is very discouraging to me that there are so many out there who have found reason to do just that. Even the author of the above letter, a homosexual herself, has convinced herself that the very nature of her being is wrong. I have to wonder if she knows why. Why does she feel this aspect of her existence is wrong? If the only answer one can provide is to cite a passage in a book, not to mention a book that later contradicts that very same notion, then we have truly reached a sad stage in human existence. Christ died for humankind, and if he had to watch the way we judge one another today, I know how deeply disappointed he would be in us, and how deeply it would hurt him. Judging the homosexual as somehow innately guilty of sin would surely not be Christ’s idea of opening our hearts to our fellow man.

    1. Patrick Duncan says:

      Andrew, you say that “we must decide what is right and wrong for ourselves”. Reminds me of Proverbs 14:12 – “There is a way that seems right to man, but in the end it leads to death”.

      The interesting thing is that if we take Scripture seriously, it does challenge our thinking in many ways and is quite different than “the way that seems right to man”. But I have seen time and again that the Bible contains wisdom that no earthly source can replicate. On the flip side, “the way that seems right to man” will take us down the road of greed, violence, selfishness, and every manner of vice. If we’re honest, we will see that pattern. The sooner we see this pattern and recognize the need for a higher way of thinking we will discover that there is no holy text or creed or philosophy that compares to Scripture. The reason for this is that it didn’t arise from a merely human mindset. It arose from the Creator’s perspective and wisdom.

    2. Matt says:

      Um, I AM homosexual and I fully agree with everything this letter says and would happily have written it myself had I thought of it.

      “Homosexual” simply refers to temptation, not to behavior.

      There are many homosexuals who choose to be celibate, to avoid gay pornography, and to do their best to live chaste and God-pleasing lives. But they are STILL homosexual because the correct definition of that word simply means one who experiences sexual temptation toward their own gender rather than the opposite.

      There are many homosexuals who have married a person of the opposite sex and greatly enjoying living with and raising children with their best friend, their spouse. Yet their primary sexual attraction is still toward those of the same sex and so they are STILL homosexual under the correct and cultural meaning of that word.

      All these homosexuals are condemned when their pastor yammers “homosexuality is sin” because he is condemning them for facing temptation even though they are repentant, believing and, often, faithfully obedient Christians.

      Meanwhile, about 10% of boys will experiment at some time with some for of same sex behavior, usually in the form of mutual masturbation during early puberty. Even though the Bible condemns this behavior, when their pastor blabbers “homosexuality is sin” many of them feel no condemnation at all. Their attraction is aimed at girls and what they did with another boy was “just curiosity.” They do not see themselves as “homosexual” and, in fact, do not fit under the proper definition of that word. So about 90% of those who should hear the condemnation of the Law DON’T because their pastor was too lazy to understand what “homosexuality” means before mindlessly gabbing out of his mouth “homosexuality is sin.”

      So, yeah, there are a very large number of homosexuals out there who could easily have written this letter and meant every single word of it.

      1. Matt says:

        oops that reply was meant for eugene – not patrick

      2. M says:

        Christ is more powerful then your temptation. If you are His child then Christ is what reigns in your life and HE is what defines you, not your temptations. While I agree there are many celibate homosexuals, the predominant meaning in our society out weighs the exception. Homosexuality in todays culture and in 1st century Judaism means a way of living, it is “what reigns in your life”. When Paul says dont be a drunkard or a fornicator or an adulter or a homosexual, he is talking about dont be letting sins defining your life. Let GOD define your life. Start with Him.
        If you have been taken by Christ, washed in His blood, asked for and received forgiveness, and have put away the old adam and seek Christ in your new life while no longer living IN or being a part of the homosexual lifestyle …while still having temptations in that direction.
        YOU ARE NO LONGER A HOMOSEXUAL. You have a new name, that name is NOT a homosexual. But a CHILD OF GOD.

    3. kim says:

      Andrew, sweetie, you say that the bible approves and disapproves homosexuality, no, hon, it doesn’t. No where in the bible does it say, it’s ok to be gay and then says not to be gay. I can tell you are probably on a kind of line when it comes to God and I will tell you that God does love you desperately despite any lifestyle. Jesus died for you b/c He loved you 2000 years ago and longs for you to live with Him in eternity. That’s what matters. Hang in there, dear. You are loved!!

  146. Kim says:

    I have a young adult daughter who is involved in a lesbian lifestyle. She grew up in the church. She also grew up in a sick and twisted home. My heart aches for her to know how honestly and truly loved she is, but she avoids family and she avoids the gospel, making it difficult to get close and put our arms around her. She is convinced that no one wants her around because of her lifestyle choices. It is all in her mind and in her heart. Every family member, immediate and distant miss her terribly, she has long been a ray of sunshine in all our lives. The church family misses her, on the occasion that someone sees her out in town, hugs and warm welcome are extended with invitations to ‘get together’ not cramming church down her throat. Just sincere desire for her to know both our love as friends and family as well as the love of Christ in us.

    I now live hours away and am part of a church that ministers to those who find themselves on “the fringe”. With a pastor who has come out of horrible drugs and the gay lifestyle – who knows the power of God that works in us, it is a place (and we go out a lot)where people can find just what the writer is requesting: The gospel, straight up, no additives; The Blood of Jesus flows deeper than any sin and cleanses completely, providing healing and deliverance as it flows. Holy Spirit comes in and provides the power to overcome – not just survive until His return.

    One exception to a couple of comments I read; If you have received Christ and thereby have been born again, you are no longer a sinner saved by grace. You were a sinner. You have been saved by faith through grace. You are now a saint. Now, it is no longer you who live, but Christ (the anointing) that lives in you. You are the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus. Jesus did not die for our sins. He died so that we could be reconciled to the Father. In that bloody death on the cross, he became the sin that separated us from the Father. He didn’t die because of anything you or I did, He was not resurrected by anything we did, and His grace is not affected by anything we do. That grace – faith in that grace – makes you clean before your Lord, it isn’t about what you do or don’t do, it is about what He did and Who He is in you. Grace is not a license to sin, it is the power to do the good works that accompany the righteousness that you are.

    Yes, we are to not allow sin to reign in our mortal bodies. But the only way to accomplish that is to get the focus off of the sin and get the focus on the One who set us free. You will become what you behold. Behold the goodness of God. Behold His love. Behold His mercy – it is new every morning. If you once wanted to sin and now you hate it, every time you do it, recognize your heart is changed, you are not who you once were. See yourself as the Father does – in Christ – His righteousness. He does not see the sin, He sees you. The sin issue has been dealt with. All the wrath of the Father was poured out on the Son. Now,the only thing that separates you from the Father is rejection of the Son. His love for you is amazing. Draw close to Him and He will draw close to you. Drag that sin, that wants to keep holding onto you, into the throne room. You’ve no doubt heard that God can’t look upon sin. That is a lie. Sin can’t look upon God. Sin can’t stand in the presence of God. So take the sin that so easily besets you to the Throne of Grace – there it is easily cast away. There you submit to your loving heavenly Father and by so doing you resist the devil, and he will flee, taking all his junk with him. You don’t have to fight the enemy of your soul alone. First get into the presence of the Lord, let Him show you His strategy, then go out and kick some devil butt!

    1. Janine says:

      Dear Sister in Christ, I take exception to your words. Jesus was not silent against sin, nor should we be inclined. Kim today at 11:02 am has wise words to you personally. Seems like she has given it lots of thought and prayer to her loved ones lives. But, ask me to be silent, I think Christians have been silent too long.

      When I sin, I want to be corrected!

      May God bless you, and help you, and all who seek Him, (myself included), to stay in the light.

  147. Vicki says:

    This is what i think is being missed by a lot of people here. The definition of being Gay is really about a person who engages in sexual acts (fornication) with someone of the same sex outside of a marriage. The Gay identity is about fornicators who celebrate in their fornication. And if they did get same-sex marriage, you aren’t going hear gay people advocating “waiting” until marriage because marriage is not consider holy. Marriage that is “holy” in a jeudo-christian meaning will go agaisnt their initial Gay identity as mentioned before. Gay Marriage is only a self actualization process (also known has “i have the right to be loved because it makes me filled fulfiled as a person”). Cause for the most part people only know they are gay for sure until they engage in sexual acts. So to me, gay people see many christians as hypocrites because they see fornication and people who don’t see marriage has “holy” in the church – no different from their own values. So this lady is right, we need to deal with sin within the church first because the basis of the gay critism of the church is based on many double standards with the sin of fornication and de-valuing the holiness of marriage. What this points too is this.. do we has as American churches have a problem with preaching/teaching of the Gosspel and discipleship? Cause God is way bigger than all of this mess.. but yet, we think we need to social analysis it to somehow fix it instead of going back to foundation of God’s bigger plan – Jesus.

  148. frebarb says:

    there is a naivete` in this country the likes that I have never seen before. Just what do good ole heteosexuals think is going to happen when homosexuals have all the rights they are after? I have seen first hand how groups of homosexuals act when they are together in public. They have no respect anyone around them or for our children. As a matter of fact in our case they directed their sexual celebrate toward our children and thought it was funny that we tried to protect and sheild the children from what they were doing. It was disgusting. Here’s the thing, because we can’t “disciminate” agaisnt them, nothing could be done about what was going on. We were told to leave, they had there “rights”. I am so sick of hearing about the rights of people that want to make our country nothing short of sexual ghettos- filthy and demoralized. It is so past time for people of FAITH to stand up for what we know is right. I do not want to harm anyone. I can tell you this, in a large group that is not how the homosexual commmity thinks. They do want us gone. We all had better think about just what that means to our children and grandchildren. My seven year old granddaughter is coming home from school and ask many questions about being gay and just what it means. We don’t want her to know about this right now, but we have no rights in this matter. Wake up America start thinking with an informed brain. Political correctness is a murder of the American way of life!!

  149. mike says:

    The writer, I feel, is spot on. However, what separates her from, really, anybody else is the fact she acknowledges homosexuality as sin. As Christians confess their sins, it seems that repentance will follow. This change has dramatic impact in relationships between Christians, no matter what the sin is or has been because of the understanding of the forgiveness offered through Christ. Now compare the above in a relationship with someone who celebrates their sin and looks to advance it or oppose the change that takes place in Christ.What are the odds meeting that type of person in a biblical congregation, unless they are looking for some sort of “change” to begin with? I have homosexual friends but none approach God with urge to repent or be forgiven.

  150. Kim says:

    Rom 4:3 The scripture says, “Abraham BELIEVED God, and because of his FAITH God accepted him as RIGHTEOUS.”
    Rom 4:4 A person who works is paid wages, but they are not regarded as a gift; they are something that has been earned.
    Rom 4:5 But those who depend on FAITH, not on deeds, and who BELIEVE in the God who declares the guilty to be INNOCENT, it is this FAITH that God takes into account in order to put them RIGHT WITH HIMSELF.
    Rom 4:6 This is what David meant when he spoke of the happiness of the person whom GOD ACCEPTS AS RIGHTEOUS, apart from anything that person does:
    Rom 4:7 “Happy are those whose wrongs are FORGIVEN, whose sins are PARDONED!
    Rom 4:8 Happy is the person whose sins the Lord will NOT KEEP ACCOUNT OF.”

    God is more interested in you than He is in anything you do/did/ever will do. He longs for relationship/fellowship with you. He is not willing to let your behavior interfere with that, why should you? (If we sin, we have an advocate with the Father. Confess your sins and He is faithful and just to forgive you and cleanse you from all unrighteousness.-This He said to the brethren) Satan is the accuser of the brethren. Jesus is their defense.

    God hates sin. That is why He made the One who knew no sin to become sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

    Religion will always want to look at the outward appearance. Relationship will see the heart. Jesus said if you will clean the inside of the cup, the outside will become clean in the process. When you accept Christ and are born again. Your spirit (your inside)is made perfect (clean). The flesh (your outside) is cleaned as your mind is renewed, by the washing of the water of the word.

    My recommendation to anyone and everyone: spend some time reading nothing except the Words of Christ (red).

    Mat 23:13 But woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you shut up the kingdom of Heaven before men; for you do not enter, nor do you allow those entering to go in.

    It’s time to stop trying to keep the carpet clean & the tile polished. The gospel is a bloody gospel and it will make a mess of your religion. People need the goodness of God and once that goodness has drawn them to repentance, who dare tell them it’s not enough? I say again, “The blood of Jesus flows deeper than any sin and it brings healing and deliverance every where it flows.”

    No matter what you have done. No matter how vile, how awful, how wicked, You were bought with a price, the blood of Jesus. Once bought, you are always owned. He will never sell you back. He will never give you away. No one can pluck you out of His hand. He adopts you as His own child. And like a well loved child, no matter what you do, you can come boldly before His throne of grace (into His presence) and find mercy to help in time of need. A parent doesn’t disown a child because they made a mistake, or because they made the same mistake multiple times. It is because of the depth of their love for the child that the child doesn’t want to make the mistake again. There is no fear in love. Perfect love casts out fear, because fear has torment.

    If you are being tormented by what you have been told is the church. Read the red, forgive them when they know not what they do, and become the church.

    1. Patrick Duncan says:

      It is wrong to pit the words in red against the words in black. So called “Red letter christians” are playing a dangerous game with this.

      1. Kim says:

        I was not pitting red letters against the black. The point is Jesus should be our example. His direct words are a good place to START. I firmly believe that all scripture is the infallable word of God and would never encourage someone to avoid any of it. I apologize if it sounded that way.

      2. kim says:

        The words Jesus spoke are always written in red in the NT gospels.

  151. Jerry Giger says:

    Homosexuality is what one does and not who one is. Scripture condemns it like any other sin. I will live the sinner the way Christ did and like Christ said to the woman at the well, “Your sins are forgiven. Go and sin no more.”

  152. M says:

    A thought.

    I agree that we all are sinners saved by the grace and the blood of Christ. We sinners in the church strive to walk towards and with Christ, even though we fail. However, I think an important distinction is parsing out those who live in sin, and those who are sinners. One who is willing to give up their sin and commit themselves to the life Jesus has offered is different then those who wish to live in the body of Christ while still living in sin. This covers everything from fornication, adultery, and homosexuality.
    Christ wipes away are past so that we might bask in His grace in the present and future. Jesus tells us that we are to forgive those who have fallen into sin as He has done, and He also tells us that our faith without works is empty. That means that there should be good fruit after forgiveness, that good fruit shows itself in different forms but with one predominant factor. Which is no longer being apart of the old adam, being tempted by the old adam is different then living in the old adam.
    We have people who struggle with homosexuality and adultery and fornication in our midst, that is normal, that is what it means to be a part of Christ, fighting the old adam.
    We also have people who are living in the old adam, living in adultery, living in fornication, living in homosexuality, that is not ok, and we should not be ok with it. Not being ok with it means we are discerning between the two and doing something about both. We ask for forgiveness and receive it, and move on towards Christ, not staying in the same spot.

  153. Joe Christian says:

    I think your right were all sinners, and have fallen short of the glory of god, in fact the bible says in 1 Corinthians that trees with out fruit will be tossed in the flame and Jesus warns of the people that will be at the gates saying lord it’s me and he will respond away from me your evil one for I never knew you, and I truly and the bible points to those people being like warm Sunday and Christians in gross sin not addressed or corrected, as for homosexuallity god paints a very clear picture if what I godly relationship in Christ is like and nowhere in scripture does he say its ok. If we are being biblical which we should be 100 percent cuz it’s our source of truth, then I truly believe there will be straight christians and homosexual Christians that will say lord it’s me, and none of us are perfect, but we serve a just god and deliberately disobeying and living in sin has consequences the bible speaks clear about it, I pray that you wouldn’t listen to me but that your would seek the truth out.

  154. Misha says:

    If this lovely woman was to die tonight, what would happen to her?
    (not that I wish ANYTHING like that to happen to her)
    There are many straight Christian who sin daily, but at the end of the day, we all repent.
    But homosexuality is a lifestyle, which most of them cannot or refuse to throw away.
    Even though true Christians cannot condemn her, but should have a STERN heart to help her through the guidance of the scripture and love.
    I think as Christians we live day by day, not knowing what or when something might happen to us, to live for God’s glory.

  155. Rogers Hamsini Banda says:

    Thanks John for sharing the letter. We need to continue praying for all our brothers and sisters who have “fallen short the glory of the Lord” (in homosexual sin) that they repent just as we also repent from different sins we commit in word and deed and in the good that we have not done.

  156. Patricia says:

    I know one woman who gave up her life (willingly) of homosexuality to one where she lives for a Christ centered life. I’ve always found her to be very inspirational and I’m sharing with all of you:

  157. Louis Answer Jnr. says:

    Once I was a sportsman, I loved eating much for energy to be fit and to perform. Sometimes I use to take pure honey, which really worked for me. I am a lover of sweets as well. There was nothing that would let me stop eating sugar and honey.
    Quite recently I was diagnosed of diabetes, after my GP told me after he read my lab report, He added that son, it’s your choice to live or die. Quit sugar and live, butbthe choice is your. It was very hard for me, but when I realized that, it’s between my taste and my life, I chose to give up sweets and I’m better now.
    God has made it clearly in his word, I’m happy that she recognizes that it’s a sin,
    Let the gay choose between his desires and his life ….God have mercy!!!

  158. Nick says:

    I found this to be incredibly refreshing! This is a voice in the church that is often not heard. It’s beautiful to hear someone struggling with sin just like the rest of us, but who doesn’t want the church to compromise God’s word in order to be loved. Church, let’s love our people and give them Jesus – the only one who will wipe away their sin and give new life

  159. Michael says:

    “We do not ask for your acceptance of our sins any more than we accept yours.”

    Then why does the “homosexual movement” want me and the rest of society to accept so-called “gay marriage”? It is because homosexuals cannot find affirmation of their choices of sins in God’s Word, so they now want society to override God and say that homosexuality is perfectly normal and “ok”.

    Indeed, it isn’t about “marriage” at all – it is about sexuality and justification of sin in the eyes of man.

    The truth is, no amount of man-given acceptance or tolerance takes away the sin (or it’s cost). God’s Word is the final measure.

    1. John Gordon says:

      Who are you to decide that gays shouldn’t have eqwual rights? Just because you think your religion demands it? Show me where the Bible demands it. Hint – it doesn’t. I know.
      Besides, we do not live in a society where we govern according to the Koran or the Bible or the Book of Mormon. In fact, we have very strict laws against doing that. If your reasoning for denying anyone the same rights that you have is because “your God feels that way” then you ought to go live in Iran or Saudi Arabia or any other theocracy.
      Secondly, why only stop at banning gays from marrying. How about alcoholics? Let’s ban them too. No marriage for non-virgins! Good grief, people.
      Third – I’m STILL waiting…after a multitude of requests for an example where Jesus said homosexuality was wrong. Yes, where JESUS said it. Not Leviticus 18:22 which is a part of the Jewish law for the priests and we do not follow and are not under it…unless you wanna be, I guess…haha. And not in Romans where Paul is specifically talking about people who are clearly heterosexual but having same-sex relationships anyway in some weird temple festival, thus denying the way God created them, and not a commentary on legit homosexual relationships.
      I want to hear from Jesus…strange that something that seems to be causing the church so much trouble is something that Jesus didn’t think important enough to either discuss or include in the scriuptures. Almost like it’s a non-issue that WE have made into one.

      1. Frank63 says:


        Romans 1 is not talking about people who are heterosexual but engaged in gay sex anyway.

        “In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed shameful acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their error”. (Rom 1:26-27)

        The passage talks about men inflamed with lust for one another. If a truly heterosexual man ever felt pressure to engage in a sex act with another man (because he thought his idol expected it), he would would do it reluctantly, not with burning lust for the other man. A man who can be inflamed with sexual lust for another man is not heterosexual by definition. A man whose sexual passions can be inflamed by another man is either homosexual or bisexual. It’s simply an Orwellian interpretation to say that when Paul talks
        about men burning in lust for one another he is talking about heterosexual men. Which is why for almost 2,000 years not one biblical scholar, regardless of how unorthodox, ever entertained such a fanciful interpretation. It wasn’t until the gay rights movement came along that a few revisionist “scholars” came out of the woodwork and told us that for the first time in 2,000 years they finally discovered what Romans 1 was really saying. Sorry, Scripture speaks with one voice on this matter. Paul’s teaching matches that of Jesus Christ, who clearly taught that marriage was between a man and a woman, and ties the purpose of marriage back to the created order of male and female(Matt 19:4-5).

        1. John Gordon says:

          Ummmm, yes. It is. Specifically. How did they ABANDON their “natural” lusts if they never had them?
          Secondly, you have to understand that Paul was still very influenced by Jewish principles and sometimes tried to make Christians come under Jewish laws. He circumcised young Timothy, which was an exclusively Jewish religious practice at the time. He also made claims that “even nature itself tells you that it is a shame for a man to have long hair.” What? It seems that when Paul often spoke about “nature” he meant “your local society.” Nature has nothing to speak on about long haired men – in fact, Lions have the long hair, most males are brighter and more colored. We must recognize where Paul is prophesying God’s words versus when Paul is offering his own advice. We have done ourselves a great disservice by assuming that every word from “In the beginning” to “come quickly, Lord Jesus” is spoken by God. It isn’t. Abd a lot of isn’t for us. That’s why you have so many people to day claiming Jer 29:11, when it’s a nice verse, but God did NOT make that promise with them, but with Jeremiah. Fall out from the name it-claim it group of evangelicals, I guess….

          1. Frank63 says:


            Nowhere does the text say that men “abandoned their natural lusts”. You are inserting words into Paul’s argument that he never wrote. This is what revisionists have to continually do to make the text say what they want it to say. The text says that men abandoned natural RELATIONS with women, not their LUSTS for women. A man with same sex desires is still capable of engaging in sexual relations with a woman. We hear stories all the time about gay men who come out of the closet after years of marriage to a woman with the explanation that they decided to “stop living a lie”. In any case, the only lusts being described in the text are SAME SEX lusts. And if you believe heterosexuals are capable of same sex lust then the terms “homosexuality” and “heterosexuality” no longer have any meeting. Paul’s obvious point is that men have abandoned the NATURAL sex act (with women) for an UNNATURAL sex act (with other men). The passage doesn’t say these men lusted after women and then they changed and started temporarily lusting after men as part of some pagan ritual. It says they abandoned natural relations which is a reference to the sex act itself. It doesn’t take an Anatomy 101 course for anyone to see that there is a natural fit between the male reproductive organ and the female sexual anatomy. There is no natural fit between the sexual organs of people with the same gender, unless you believe God created the human rectum to be the natural receptacle for the male reproductive organ, which is absurd on it’s face!

            Furthermore, your argument that “nature” really means “your local society” falls flat because it utterly ignores the CONTEXT of Romans 1 which is not some local situation but Paul’s indictment of the entire human race and it’s guilt before God. In verse 20 Paul begins his argument with creation itself and proceeds to argue that men’s hearts became darkened and their thoughts futile, which sets the context as universal, not local (ie. Jewish). Every other sin mentioned in Paul’s litany of offenses in Romans 1 is clearly universal in scope (ie. they are offenses that are clearly sins for all times for all places). Nowhere else in Romans 1 do we find offenses related to customs like long hair, etc. You just can’t pluck the one sin of homosexual activity out of Romans 1 and say that alone was a “local” offense but all the other sins are universal. You can’t just switch the context of Romans 1 as if it were the same as 1 Corinthians 11 (where long hair is mentioned). The context of 1 Corinthians 11 is TRADITIONS that Paul had previously delivered to the Corinthians (see 1 Cor 11:1), not the universal guilt of men before God which is the context of Romans 1.

            Finally, you didn’t respond to my point about Jesus definition of marriage in Matthew 19. Is that one of those things in the Bible you have decided is “not for us” today?

            1. Frank63 says:

              oops, sorry the reference in my prior post should be 1 Cor 11:2, not verse 1.

  160. Ose says:

    Amen lyn! The compromise and ignorance of the Word that I see here is unbelievable. You cannot decide what you FEELl is right or wrong. Lyn rightly divided the Word, and still some of you try to put your own spin to it. This letter is nothing to celebrate or agree with. Beware of the subtlety of the enemy! You cannot say you’re my sister in Christ and continue in sin. Romans 6 says, HOW CAN WE CONTINUE IN SIN, SO THAT GRACE MAY ABOUND?? God forbid! You can strive against sin, as the Word tells us to do, but you don’t say you’re a homosexual in church. I know these are the last days, because of the comments I’ve seen here. Stay in the Word lyn!

  161. John Gordon says:

    If people were being honest, they would admit that they obey the Bible selectively as well.
    At some point, some people had to say, “look, I know the Bible says for the widow of a man who is without a son to marry her brother-in-law and try to conceive…and I know that even Jesus mentioned it…but that was for them and doesn’t apply to us.”
    And at some point, not long ago, some people had to say “look, I know the Bible talks positively about slavery, and negatively about inter-racial marriage, even banning it to some extent…but that was for them and doesn’t apply to us.”
    Slavery, and verses pertaining to it measure in the hundreds. But this ONE area…that is mentioned in MAYBE 3 differemt areas, involving less than ten verses, has become such an immense thing.
    People today aren’t interested in being worlman of the Word, learning how to RIGHTLY divide it…

  162. John Gordon says:

    I’m really left dumbfounded how anyone has the time to tell others that they are in sin. Have you fotgotten how filthy and disgusting you ar? Even your righteousness is like filthy rage! I have too much in my own life to work on to even begin playing the Holy Spirit in other’s lives!
    It’s not “love the sinner, hate the sin…”
    It’s “love the sinner and worry about your own sin…when you are completely and utterly without sin, maybe then you can talk to others. Until then, shut up.”

    1. Katy says:

      John Gordon,
      most of the Christians in these comments have been quick to point out their own struggle with sin. Most of the Christians here are authentic people who want to LOVE fellow Christians who are struggling to obey God and not their sinful desires.

      There is a clearly a Biblical place within Christianity to help one another to see each other’s sins without being a hypocrite (Mt.18:5, Gal.6:1, 1 Jn.5:16).

      As far as your continuous comments about Jesus not specifically condemning homosexuality, neither did he specifically condemn bestiality, incest, abortion and more.

      Jesus was passionately committed to holiness and upholding God’s Law. See Matthew 5:17-20. All Jesus’ teaching came from the worldview of the Torah: That God created male and female to be joined in a marriage covenant with the possibility of produce children. Any other sexual relationships are a deviation from His design and cause damage and destruction to the human heart and body.

      “For a time is coming when people will no longer listen to sound and wholesome teaching. They will follow their own desires and will look for teachers who will tell them whatever their itching ears want to hear. They will reject the truth and chase after myths.” 2 Tim 4:3.4

      The main reason I have taken the time to answer your comments is because I want to encourage fellow Christians to stand for the truth, particularly for the sake of children who are being led into bondage.

  163. kidarsenal says:

    the only thing that needs to be said regarding this whole ridiculous “open letter.” it’s anonymous, which means anyone could have written it.

  164. John Gordon says:

    Katy – thanks for your response.
    I hope that you are not comparing incest (which is usually a form of abuse) and, bestiality, which involves rape of an animal that can not give consent, with a monogamous, healthy, adult same-sex relationship. The only thing similar between them is the fact that they both involve sex of some kind; otherwise, it really is a false comparison.
    Regardless – you make a good point. What to do with the things that you feel are wrong, but Jesus said nothing about? Well first of all, I’d follow the Holy Spirit inside. Secondly, I’d obey the local laws, as long as they aren’t discriminatory. For example, while God may not care if you drink a beer at a playground after hours, the local police certainly do, and unless you feel that it is discriminatory in some way, you probably would do well to obey the law, or vote to change it if it’s that big of a deal to you.
    Thirdly – you say that Christ was into upholding God’s law, the Torah…I can think of several verses where Jesus said and did the exact opposite. He broke the Sabbath, healed people who weren’t spose to be touched, drank with the wrong people, etc….no, Christ was not concerned with obeying the Torah or finding holiness through it. Sorry, but He just wasn’t – in fact, He said that He fulfilled or a closer translation “finished, or completed” the law. He also said that ALL of the law is wrapped up in the NEW commandment He gave “this is MY commandment; that you love one another.” He didn’t add “oh yeah, and don’t forget to go to church, brush your teeth, buy American, and only date the opposite sex.”
    Fourth, as I said on here before, if “procreation” is what defines a “true” marriage, there are an awful lot of barren men and women, and older people who got married who are going to be pretty surprised to learn that they are living in sin. That obviously is a false equivalency as well.
    Fifth, what on earth are you talking about with your parting shot about “for the children!?” I also want Christians to stand for the truth. I just strongly, completely, and totally disagree that what the church has taught for the last 75 years about homosexuality, is just as wrong as what the church taught for years and years about slavery and the supposed sinfulness of inter-racial relationships, as well.
    Yeah – they found lots of Bible verses to back their bigotry up then too.
    This is why instead of just sitting there and taking in other’s points of view (even mine) you must study to SHOW yourself a workman, RIGHTLY dividing the word of truth!

    1. kim says:

      John, dude, you can’t just pick and chose from the bible all the happy, dancing with daisies parts and ignore the rest. You have to take the whole thing. To say God never mentioned homosexuality is just false. 1 Cor 6:9-10 says that those who practice homosexuality will never inherit the kingdom of God. If you go to strong’s concordance and look up the verse in original Greek. It says clearly now ye 1492 not 3756 that 3754 the unrighteous 94 shall 2816 0 not 3756 inherit 2816 the kingdom 932 of God 2316? Be 4105 0 not 3361 deceived 4105 : neither 3777 fornicators 4205, nor 3777 idolaters 1496, nor 3777 adulterers 3432, nor 3777 effeminate 3120, nor 3777 abusers of themselves with mankind 733, Now that last phrase means, homosexuals, period. When did this strange teaching come into the church that we all just pick and chose the verses we like, ignore the rest, spread this bizarre hippy love around, Jesus is your ‘get out of hell for free card’ and sing cum-by-ya? Paul said in Galatians cursed is anyone who spreads around a gospel other than what we have told you. What you are saying is NOT Christ’s gospel but some bizarre hippy love.

      1. John Gordon says:

        Wrong. You don’t speak Greek, do you? The word in 1 Cor was NEVER translated as “homosexual” until this past century! The word did not even exist until then. The two words used, arsenokoités and malakos, occur in a vice list in 1 Cor. 6:9, and arsenokoités recurs in 1 Tim. 1:10. Although the translation of these two words has varied through the years, in the twentieth century they have often been taken to refer to people who engage in homosexual, or at least male homosexual, sex, and the conclusion sometimes then follows that the New Testament or Paul, condemns homosexual “activity.”
        Usually the statement is accompanied by a shrugged-shoulder expression, as if to say, I’m not condemning homosexuality! I’m just reading the Bible. It’s there in the text. Such protestations of objectivity, however, become untenable when examined closely. By analyzing ancient meanings of the terms, on the one hand, and historical changes in the translation of the terms on the other, we discover that interpretations of arsenokoités and malakos as condemning modern homosexuality have been driven more by ideological interests in marginalizing gay and lesbian people than by the general strictures of historical criticism.
        If you are at all serious about wishing to do what Paul said, “to study to show yourself a workman of God, who knows how to RIGHTLY divide the word of truth” then I suggest you dig deeper and discover for your own self what this word actually means. The clearest understanding that modern day scholars have of the word, refers to straight men who had sex with younger boys on the side – pederasty. This was common in the Corinthian culture, and Paul needed to speak out against it, and righfully so.
        Context is EVERYTHING when trying to understand the Bible, and picking one verse out witthout examining the passage, or the historical background, or the speaker, or the audience, or the geographical location, etc leads to horrible misunderstandings, tyhe way the Church got slavery wrong, and inter-racial relationships, and womens rights very, very wrong. And we only started to get those things closer to right in the last century!
        Are you so incredibly arrogant to assume that we have everything right now and couldn’t possibly misunderstand something? Sigh…

    2. kim says:

      And John you’re also wrong when you say Jesus broke the Torah left and right. He didn’t break the Torah laws, only the interpretation set down by the Pharisees. Mark 3;1-6 has Jesus healing on the Sabbath, but He says to them, Is it lawful on the Sabbath to do good or to do evil? No where in the OT did God say you can’t heal on the Sabbath. That was a Pharisee thing. He was making a point. He NEVER broke the Torah, never once. You act like you know the Word of God, yet you don’t have a single clue what it says and then you teach others to do the same. You need to race from where ever you’re getting this crazy gospel from b/c it’s not from God, period. You’re being deceived by Satan. If Jesus had broken the Torah left and right, then He couldn’t be the spotless lamb of God who was crucified for our sins. By believing that He died for our sins and making Him Lord and Savior, we are spotless before God. Without Him, we will be under God’s wrath.

      1. John Gordon says:

        Yeah, you’re ridiculous. If you calm down and speak to me like a rational person, I will enter a discussion. We disagree on a subject that you know very little about, and so you accuse me of “being decieved by Satan?!”
        Good grief…
        And no, sorry – Jesus was not spotless and an acceptable sacrifice because He completely obeyed the Torah…that’s just really, really off.

    3. Katy says:

      I write this reply not for the sake of John Gordon but for the sake of any others who may be confused by his false teaching.

      From the beginning of time, the devil has tried to distort God’s beautiful design. God created the woman for the man, to be his counterpart, and to produce fruit. God created biology. God saw “it was very good.” The devil loves to distort and destroy what God made good.

      Nowhere has it been stated that being barren is living in sin; that is a ridiculous comment. We are talking about God’s intention, God’s design, and God’s stated law.

      As Kim said, Jesus did not break God’s law. He revealed the Pharisees’ wrongful additions to it. The law that sex is meant to be between a married man and woman is one of God’s most fundamental laws from the beginning of time. Any form of immorality is rebellion and causes DAMAGE.

      1. John Gordon says:

        And yet, you refuse to directly show me from Scripture where I am wrong. You make these broad statements as if I disagree with them – this is called a strawman argument – and that is dishonest. By the way, you are wrong – several people throughout this post have claimed that homosexuality is so evidently wrong due to the f act that procreation does not occur. Yet you claim that nobody said this type of thing. Why must you use lies to defend your beliefs? Think about it…

        1. Katy says:

          You well know that the people who mentioned procreation meant that homosexuality denies God’s created biology, the possibility or intention of procreation, not that married heterosexual couples who are barren are committing a sin.

          Where does God’s Word sanction and bless homosexual sex, John? Where does Jesus? You know they do not.

          With regard to sins not specifically mentioned by Jesus, you have previously said “listening to the Holy Spirit” and Jesus’ summing up of the commandments with the Greatest Commandment, the commandment to love as proof of God’s okay for homosexuality. If you use logic like this, you will have no argument against those who plead for the rights of those who prefer (consensual of course) sex with close family members, or with minors, and why not consensually with animals? There is already a movement to promote the rights of those who are attracted to sex with children. They believe they can prove their case that the children are consensual.

          This is where your logic is leading you. You have no argument against these people.

          God does not go against His Word and the created laws of the Universe. Do not trivialize the sacredness of our sexuality along the lines of brushing your teeth.

          1. John Gordon says:

            Wrong. Nowhere have I said that listening to the Holy Spirit or anything about the Greatest Commandment as being “proof of God’s okay for homosexuality.” That’s a straight up lie. You inferred something that I did NOT say and are misrepresenting me and my words . Either quote me correctly, or don’t quote me at all.
            I would appreciate an apology.
            Secondly, how idiotic does one have to be to compare a mutual, adult, agreed upon, same-sex relationship with bestiality? An animal can’t give consent. What is wrong with the way you think about people? I really mean that. Take a few seconds and try to figure that out.
            And as far as children go, they are underage and can’t give consent. Another utterly stupid attempt at correlation.
            But we heard the EXACT SAME arguments when people preached against legalizing inter-racial marriage in Ameruca 50 or 60 years ago, so it’s nothing new.

            1. Katy says:

              Where does it say in the Bible that God approves or blesses homosexuality?

              1. Katy says:

                The ‘underage’ status of children is a man-made law, and to those who oppose it believes it falls into the same category as other ‘outdated’ laws.

                You seem opposed to consensual incest and consensual pedophilia. As a Bible-using person, how would you back this up from the Bible?

              2. John Gordon says:

                Thank you for your polite question. Seriously.
                While the specific age when a child becomes an adult is a man-made thing, we are told many, many times in the Scrtiptures not to harm or hurt children. If your state says a “child” means under 18, then that’s the rule. But it’s not the letter of the law that really applies to good people of any faith or maybe no faith. It’s that we know that it is wrong to coerce, manipulate and abuse anyine, but particularly children. The government HAD to pick an age that if sex occured while younger than, then the state could prosecute.
                But morally, it comes down to the fact that a child is not an adult, and therefore unable to give consent until the child becomes of age, legally.
                I don’t know WHY people would want to have sex with children, but I believe it should remain illegal, due to the fact that the child can’t ever give consent. Is underage sex “gross” or repugnant to me? Sure…but we don’t base laws on a certain groups feelings, but we base then on protecting the individual.
                I am not opposed legally, to ADULT incest. It has happened throughout the centuries, even in some countries still allowing up to first cousins to marry. It also disgusts me personally, but if two cousins that are adults want to get married, they ought to be able to.
                However, a good fact-based argument agaginst legalizing incest can be made which includes the dangers of inter-breeding, and it claims that incest endangers the life of the incestual couples children. While I personally agree with this, I don’t think that this is enough of a deterrent to make it illegal.
                Again, we do not and can not legislate according to our feelings, but according to the rights of the individuals. If you are an adult and you are not harming anyone or creating a victim of some kind, it ought to be legal. Just because something may seem to me, or to most people, as a repugnant, awful, no good idea, that shouldn’t factor in the legality.
                Finally, where on earth you got the idea that I am for “consensual pedophilia” I have no idea. I assume that you mean “consensual child molestation” which can never be consensual due to the fact that it involves a child who is unable to legally make that decision. By the way, pedophilia is not a crime. It simply refers to a sexual desire for pre-pubescent children. The desire is not the action. the action, is called “molestation” and as I said before is illegal. I really don’t know where in the world you got in my writings that I was advocating for it. I suggest that you re-read what I write – this is twice now that you have really inferred something that is not there.

              3. John Gordon says:

                Where in the Bible does it say that God approves or blesses driving a car?

              4. Katy says:

                John Gordon,
                I did not say you were for consensual pedophilia. Read it again.

                You are making claims that Christians should not believe that homosexuality is a sin.
                My question is, how do you back up these claims from a study of what the Bible has to say about human sexuality? You know, the kind of study you have spoken of, “rightly dividing the Word of Truth”.

                Don’t try to squirm out of it by putting this topic in the same category as driving a car, brushing your teeth, buying American. You instantly remove yourself from the debate if you cannot back up your claims from God’s Word. Anyone who is an authentic student of the Bible can see that human sexuality is a deadly serious topic.

                Stop trying to use God’s Word to promote your own personal agenda. Be honest about your own emotion in the matter. If you cannot accept what God’s Word says, stop falsifying yourself as a Christian. And STOP trying to influence others with the lies.

                I know it’s not only you. There are many who are doing it. I feel sorry for you, for someone has deceived you also.

  165. wayne says:

    HEre is a message in the subject that you may find of interest.

  166. The practice of a sinful behavior is different than just succumbing to a temptation and then committing that sin. There is too much give in this article/letter. This post sounds like other posts that want to compromise the Word of God. Surprised that the Gospel coalition published it.

  167. Sally says:

    Thank you for the letter. You are right on. I am a hetero married to a Baptist youth pastor…and we agree with you…except we do not personally see you as “the woman at the well”…we see you as sinners in need of a Saviour, just like us. You are most welcome in our home, at our table, in our lives publicly or privately. We love you. Though I wish I could speak for all Christians, of course I cannot. But this one humble Christ following family wants to apologize for how The Church has treated you- you don’t deserve that and I am so sorry. Wishing you blessings. Sally

  168. Seth says:

    I wonder, has this author ever confessed to her church and asked for help? If she did, I seriously doubt she would be met with condemnation. Many churches have ministries specifically tailored for gays who want to change. We in the church aren’t stupid, we know there are probably some gays among us. But if they never say anything, how are we supposed to know who they are or what they need?

  169. Norman says:

    Fornicators, adulterers, homosexuals…all of US must repent of our sins. Jesus told the woman caught in the act of adultery, “I do not condemn you, either. Go. From now on sin no more.” Jesus does not accept sin. Unless we repent, we will likewise perish. The prodigal repented from the pigpen to the Father’s house. Satan believes everything you believe about Jesus, but he refuses to repent!

  170. Marilyn says:

    If this isn’t sugar coating a deviant lifestyle I don’t know what is. Don’t try to make it sound God approved,sex between 2 women is wrong. Christians are told to come out and be separate. Just repent.

    1. Riley says:

      “Can you love us unconditionally and support us as Christ works in our lives, as He works in yours, to help us all to overcome?

      To those of you who would change the church to accept the gay community and its lifestyle: you give us no hope at all.”

      Marilyn, the author of the letter clearly does NOT want to satisfy her homosexual desires. Why should she say “to help us all to overcome.” If she doesn’t mean overcome her sins, you’re entertaining falsehood. She also rebukes gay-affirming churches for giving her no hope at all.

      I pray 2 things for you
      1) With all due respect, work on your reading comprehension skill
      2)Repent. You bore a false witness against another Christ follower

  171. Marilyn says:

    what she is saying is she doesn’t want the guilt, she wants to go eventually to heaven but still be between the sheets with other women.

  172. Amy says:

    It is sad to hear that anyone feels condemn by a church for their sins. Jesus did not come to condemn, but to save. Homosexuality is no worse that any other sin, for God sin has no degree. I know that there are homosexuals in our churches. Just as there are adulterers, liars, thieves, cheaters, and many “other” sinners. We all fall short of the glory of God. I pray that churches will learn to accept people no matter where they are or what how they sin. Love and accept the sinner, not their behavior.

  173. Ken Godevenos says:

    I would recommend those writing on this topic to watch this teaching that you may find helpful.

  174. jose abarca says:

    You sound like a very good christian with great intentions. Wish there were more like you out there!
    The church does not hate homosexuals, the church welcomes homosexuals and everyone for that matter.
    It is my understanding that the church does not disaprove of the person. The behaviors are what the church does not approve of. The church does not impose on you (or anyone)anything, it only follows the path set forth by Jesus.
    It is us humans who due to our personal preferences try to force the church into changing to accomodate our wishes. This applies not only to homosexuals but to many other groups of people.

    God bless.

  175. Eric Hostetter says:

    Now I would definitely meet this person for a cup of coffee.

  176. susie sapp says:

    i for one am so very sorry.

  177. john says:

    There certainly are many Christians struggling with homosexual tendencies. But it is unbiblical to characterize yourself as a gay or lesbian if you are in Christ. Referring to yourself as a gay/lesbian basically communicates that…”I still practice this…it is the pattern of my life.” But the Bible says that those who practice these things will not enter into the Kingdom of Heaven. Paul writes about those life patterns in the past tense:
    “Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God. Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.” 1 Corinthians 6:9-11

    1. John Gordon says:

      That’s just not true or accurate, John. The terms “homosexual” and “gay” and “lesbian” all refer to orientation. They refer to what gender one is attracted to, not any specific sexual act. For example, I am currently ivorced heterosexual man. I was a heterosexual as far back as I can remember, I was a heterosexual before I ever had sex, while I was having sex and am currently still a heterosexual.
      This idea that claiming the title “homosexual” as a Christian is the same kind of thing as calling yourself a “liar” or a “thief” is just utter nonsense. On the one hand, liars lie. Thieves steal. Homosexual does not DO anything. It’s just the way you feel attracted to a certain gender.
      Lying to yourself about what you “feel” does not lead to healthiness or growth.

      1. john says:

        The Apostle Paul said that homosexuals do not enter the kingdom of Heaven…and He says “such were [past tense] some of you.” You have a different definition of homosexual than the Bible does. In Corinth, there were homosexuals that got saved…then their lives were no longer characterized by homosexuality, and as it was before and according to the Apostle Paul it was no longer fitting to call them homosexuals…it doesn’t mean they didn’t struggle still. If you are in Christ then ultimately the practice and pattern and characterization of your life is none of these sins listed. Read the passage.

        1. John Gordon says:

          No. He didn’t. The word “homosexual” didn’t exist until the past century. So how could Paul have said that?
          Secondly he says NOTHING about heaven or eternal life or salvation. He says “will inherit the kingdom of heaven.”
          What is the kingdom of heaven? Paul told the Romans that “For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking, but of righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.”
          In other words, these sins that he listed, as well as many others – which did NOT include homosexuality – did not stop someone from being saved. But they certainly stopped someone from living righteously, from having any peace or joy in the Holy Spirit, as the Holy Spirit is now grieved.
          On a side note, having engaged in this post, I have to say that it makes me sad to see so many people who call themselves Christians who so badly want to condemn others and damn them to hell because they are certain that THEY are “in sin” but nobody yet is showing Christ’s grace and fighting for them…they call their judgmentalism and condemnation “love” and make excuses for their judging – “because they are in sin” they say, or “real love tells them they are in sin!” Really? That’s YOUR job, is it? Did the Holy Spirit hire you on, then? Or does the Scripture which tells us specifically not to judge and that every servant is accountable to their own master not apply to you? I think it does…

          1. John Gordon says:

            Wish I could edit, but I rushed…Paul didn’t say “kingdom of heaven” as I pointed out – he said “kingdom of God” which is described as I wrote….

      2. But would you write a letter an self-identify as a heretosexual? Or a Liar? Etc.? The self-labeling is telling.

  178. George says:

    This needs to be read from our pulpits. Sin is sin, plain and simple. Regardless of whether that sin is homosexuality, adultery, or a “little white lie”. We’re all on a level playing field in the eyes of God, and we’re called to LOVE regardless.

    We all took the same road to damnation, and we all have the exact same path to justification and then sanctification.

  179. James Wilkes says:

    A sin is a sin! Repenting of your sin is required! Yes we will fail again! However to repent we must first realize that we have sinned!

  180. How about this? Kill the “Lesbian” label and move beyond it. The letter should be titled “An Open Letter to the Church from a Believer who Struggles With Homosexuality”. OR maybe, “…from A Believer who Struggles with Pride. Greed. Lust. Deceit. Envy. Adultery. Fornication. Slander. Insubordination. Alcohol. Etc. Etc. Etc.” By starting the conversation with this label, she is by default stressing it as unique and different, and we are guilty of that on either side of the argument. The goal with any of these is willingness and submission to allow Christ to overcome them, and not to excuse them as normal or OK.

  181. Dean Bailey says:

    While I do agree with the truth of the message in this article (I have witnessed the lack of compassion myself), there was also an all too familiar attitude of pride in the delivery that still turns my stomach. And it starts right there in the title!

    My question to the unknown author would be, “If you are of Christ, and you call yourself my ‘sister’ in him, then what in Christ’s Name are you doing calling yourself a ‘lesbian’ ?!”

    It is this whole gay identity thing that many of these folks just can’t seem to get past. As a man who has himself been redeemed by the Love of Christ, I would never refer to myself as “gay” or homosexual any longer, because in Christ Jesus, the truth does set free, and I am free indeed! But in her criticism here, the author of this letter seems to have completely ignored the fact that her identity as a Christian believer is in Christ Jesus, not in her previous sexual behavior, which obviously still takes precedence with her, given the title of the message itself. What, is there some false pretense or ideology here that supposes that a Christian believer can continue to live a life of sin if that sin happens to be homosexuality, and that the Body of Christ today should be just fine with that? That’s an apostasy!

    I do have compassion, yes. But I’m going to point out the error of her pride as well.

    1. Dean Bailey says:

      ~ 2 Corinthians 5:17
      Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!

      ~ Colossians 3:3
      For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God.

      ~ 1 Corinthians 6:9-11
      Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

      ~ John 4:10
      Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”

      ~ 1 John 3:1-3
      See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when Christ appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. All who have this hope in him purify themselves, just as he is pure.

    2. Dean Bailey says:

      All of the other sins she mentions are indeed infiltrating the Church, just as much. The difference is that you will never read “an open letter to the church from an adulterer,” with a delivery such as this one, and you will also never find this attitude becoming prevalent in the church from born-again believers that supposes the identity of an “adulterer” is “who I am!”

      1. Lori says:

        And there it is. Thank you for this wise and insightful response. Thank you, Dean.

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Justin Taylor, PhD

Justin Taylor is executive vice president of book publishing and book publisher for Crossway and blogs at Between Two Worlds. You can follow him on Twitter.

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