Finding God in My Loneliness: A Conversation with Lydia Brownback

It was a real honor for me to sit down with my colleague Lydia Brownback to ask her a few questions about her new book, Finding God in My Loneliness (Crossway, 2017).

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Here is what others are saying about the book, followed by the table of contents and a sample chapter.

“I have a great marriage and lots of good friends and a great church family, and yet I often feel lonely. I don’t think I’ve ever read anything on loneliness that seemed to get to the heart of it, or applied any real wisdom to it until Finding God in My Loneliness. Instead of presenting a merely psychological, social, or practical answer, Lydia Brownback provides a profoundly biblical answer to the loneliness we all feel at times, walking readers through the biblical story and ably demonstrating how God works in and through loneliness in the lives of those he calls his own.”
Nancy Guthrie, Bible teacher; author, Hearing Jesus Speak into Your Sorrow

“We used to know who the lonely people were—young singles living solo in small apartments, aging shut-ins, or those sequestered away by illness. It’s not that way anymore. In a world of frenetic activity, loneliness is an epidemic that is impacting everyone. It’s why Lydia Brownback’s new book is urgently needed—too many people, especially women, are suffocating for lack of real and meaningful friendships. Christians can make the difference, though, and Finding God in My Loneliness speaks not only to the solitary heart, but also to those who desire to reach out, embrace, and fill the space. A remarkable book with a culturally timely message!”
Joni Eareckson Tada, Founder and CEO, Joni and Friends International Disability Center

“At some level—ever since Genesis 3—every human being experiences the pain of isolation and alienation. Lydia grapples honestly with various loneliness-inducing life seasons and circumstances. And she helps us understand how our loneliness can be redeemed by the Friend who endured the ultimate loneliness for our sakes, and who anoints us with the oil of joy as we walk in union and communion with him.”
Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, author; Host, Revive Our Hearts

“Brownback illuminates sources of loneliness and encourages Christian readers to lean on God when they feel lonely. She contends that readers cannot fix their loneliness, a statement that might disappoint those expecting self-help advice. Brownback gives relatable examples of the various causes of loneliness, including grief, losing a sense of home, and being different. She uses her own experience of single life, and observations of others’ marriages, to craft a particularly effective pair of chapters on the loneliness of marriage versus the loneliness of being unmarried. Brownback maintains, women must learn to trust in God’s plan and goodness. Brownback’s encouraging book is a sharp, thoroughly readable entreaty to readers looking for grace in loneliness.”
Publishers Weekly

“I love this book. It is full of truth. Regardless of whether you’re married or single, eighty years old or eighteen, man or woman, rich or poor, Western or Eastern, everyone will face loneliness at one time or another. Brownback tells us that the main reason we get lonely is because we’re not home yet. She helps us to see that only when we find our significance, security, and comfort in Christ will we realize that we are never alone. Reading this book set off a gospel bomb of joy and hope in my heart. I urge everyone to read it immediately and meditate on these truths for a lifetime.”
Dave Furman, Senior Pastor, Redeemer Church of Dubai; author, Being There: How to Love Those Who Are Hurting

“At one time or another, all of us experience loneliness—not just solitude, but loneliness. In this unique and valuable study, Lydia Brownback draws from Scripture and experience to uncover the heart issues and responses that lead lonely Christians in healthy or unhealthy directions. Without downplaying the inescapable loneliness of living in a fallen world, Finding God in My Loneliness nonetheless finds abiding hope in the friendship of Jesus Christ.”
Philip Graham Ryken, President, Wheaton College; author, Loving the Way Jesus Loves

“Young or old, wealthy or poor, married or single, loneliness can dishearten and discourage. Lydia Brownback writes with compassion and insight into the causes of our loneliness, as well as helps us understand God’s redemptive work in the midst of it. If you’re struggling with feeling like you’re the only one, Finding God in My Loneliness is the book for you.”
Melissa Kruger, Women’s Ministry Coordinator, Uptown Church, Charlotte, North Carolina; author, The Envy of Eve; Editor, The Gospel Coalition; blogger, Wit’s End

Table of Contents

Introduction: Why Are We Lonely?

Part 1: Loneliness Reinforced

1. Treasuring the Wrong Treasure
2. The Lies of Loneliness

Part 2: Loneliness Realized

3. The Loneliness of Leaving
4. The Loneliness of Night
5. The Loneliness of Obedience
6. The Loneliness of Running Away
7. The Loneliness of Grief
8. The Loneliness of Being Different
9. The Loneliness of Being Unclean
10. The Loneliness of Misplaced Love
11. The Loneliness of Marriage
12. The Loneliness of Being Unmarried

Part 3: Loneliness Redeemed

13. In the Family of God’s People

Conclusion: The Man of Sorrows